Social taken my children

[FLICKFLICK89]

Probably posting wrong here first time user Lost my children for a second time due to mainly mental health there already on care order from previous different issues what are My chances of getting them bk as 2years been suffering and asking for.help but nothing was put in to place to help me till 3weeks b4 they where taken

most importantly, the children are safe

It sounds life you disagree that being constantly in A and E for nothing, leaving your children with an unsuitable parent time and again, is problematic.
Your children need stability and reliable parents, not chaos.

I'm sure that you do realise on some level what your actions have caused with regard to the children.

You need to stop seeing social services as the enemy for a start.
They're doing the best they can for your children.
How many have you got? How old are they?

Well it didn't feel like nothing at the time else I wouldn't ov gone no 1 said my partner was unstable they said dishonest and yea I do no what my actions was causing this is why I wanted the help

Don't see them as the enemy am just wanted see the whole report instead of bits and contact over the children there 10 and 11

It sounds like you’re having panic attacks. They are very intense physically and can feel like heart attacks, with chest pain and shortness of breath.

BUT they are completely harmless, you will not die of them and you don’t need an ambulance/medical assistance. They will pass on their own. You can learn to breath through them and the sensations will slowly fade. A long slow breath out is important, keep breathing slow and steady and they will pass.

have you approached your local IAPT/talking therapies service for CBT? They may or may not offer this based on how they assess the level of ‘complexity’ and whether they think you can engage effectively and benefit from a short term structured treatment or not but it’s worth a try, and shows social you are making an effort.

Your poor kids. Think about them first, not fighting with social services. What was the exact incident that got them involved in the first place, you need to fix that.

You said he emailed... what about calling them and then following up with an email?
Like further to our phone conversation today blablabla or sorry we tried to call you X times between 3pm and 8pm ....

There is obviously stuff going on with dad you are not telling us (absolutely fine!!). But it does make giving advice difficult.

At 10 and 11 this could be having an absolutely traumatising effect on them. They certainly don't need returned just to be bounced back out again at the next incident. For their sake I would seriously consider putting them first and leaving them be. Have you even considered maybe they'd rather stay elsewhere?

I see on your other thread that your kids have been removed before, for two years. Focus on getting yourself better and provide secure, solid, home for them to try to start living with their trauma.

To make your replies make more sense, either tag whoever you’re replying to with @ username, or click the dots in the corner and select ‘quote’.

Speak to the Family Rights Group. They’ll help you navigate this process.

OP forget about emails and "legal challenges", and all the rest. The children are safe and what you need to do for them now is focus on your health. You mentioned the crisis team, are they coming round daily? I assume you are on medication, are you taking it absolutely as you should? Be honest with the mental health team, follow your care plan, take your medication, eat well and take care of yourself physically. That is what you do right now. The rest is noise at the moment. As long as you know the children are safe and being cared for, there is nothing you can do for them until you are better.

With regards to the father being 'unsuitable' it sounds like a similar situation to a mother who is with an abusive partner, she may be able to care fully for the children but is deemed not safe as unable to prioritise their emotional wellbeing by leaving. I supported a friend through a similar situation, the children were on a care order but with the parents, thankfully the dad had a decent solicitor who made it clear to him that unless he left he would lose the children. We've also had a similar situation in our family where someone had to leave their home to ensure the mental wellbeing of the children and if they hadn't ss would have stepped in.

Is your current partner the children's father?

You need to interact with social services, calmly and clearly tell them it is your intention that you will do all that they ask to regain care of your children.

Make sure you interact with the crisis team, your GP and everything else that you can get access to, have therapy, get on a medication regime. If it isn't helpful, get it changed. It can take many chops and changes to get the right medication mix.

Ask social services for guidance-
• you want to know what steps they expect that you take to adequately prove that your children's needs can, and will be met by you and DH, in your home.
• Which information they want to be kept updated on, and by which way is preferable- email, call or can you just save it all for each meeting.
•How involved you can be in the children's daily care whilst the children are at their grandparents and if there are any things they'd specifically prefer that you weren't involved in for the time being.

Work with them, work with them, and work with them.

I do wonder how this all came about though, did the hospital make social services aware that you kept turning up? I'm just not sure how you got to the point where they turned up after so long

I'm sorry this has happened to you, Op but can you please tell us why dad can't care for the children? People have repeatedly asked and you haven't replied. Surely if dad was providing appropriate care for your children, however unwell you unfortunately were would not have resulted in them being removed? There must be more to it.

All this seems to be about you and want you demand, ot does not come across as caring for the children or what is best for them

They need to best care they can get going with what you said that is not with you or their father it seems

OP, I'm not sure you are going to the support you need here. Is there anyone you can talk to in real-life?

I'm very sorry you are having such a difficult time.

All this seems to be about you and want you demand, ot does not come across as caring for the children or what is best for them

This.

In all of your posts op, you're talking about you. Your health problems, your mental health, how no one would help or support you, how you want your kids back and what MN think your chances are.

In all of your many posts you've actually barely mentioned the children.

What about them? What impact has all this had on them? What's the best thing for them right now?

The posters attacking OP - there may be validity to your points but I'm not sure OP is in a place where she can address them, or take them on board.

This is clearly a complex and difficult situation

Exactly - that’s why I suggested she should seek help from the Family Rights Group. They will explain the process to her and support her through it. They have FAQs on their website.

Does this group look at the 'whole family' rights and include parental responsibility?

@GertrudeJekyllAndHyde sorry I did not mean to quote you! I meant to quite the post from someone else saying the OP was attacked.

I don't see anyone attacking the OP. They are trying to articulate her posts. A thread full of gentle "it will be ok" posts will not be useful. There will be qualified social workers and family lawyers that can give sound advice but first these posters would need to establish the facts, which has been challenging due to the manner in which OP writes. It's not an attack to give practical advice, that's presumably why the OP posted.