Astrologer getting in my head

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I'm in my late 30s, married with a loving DH (my 2nd marriage) and my DC is a toddler. Decent paying job albeit intense.

Prior to this I had a rocky life - suffered child abuse till I was 12, emotional abuse from ex-DH.
For the first time in my life I'm in a good place however I have great anxiety about the future and having the happiness that I have now taken away from me. I can't stop worrying and embarrassingly have started consulting an astrologer in the hope of getting some sort of reassurance that my future will be ok.

Unfortunately the astrologer i consulted has said that from now till 2028 I will have a rocky time financially and with my DH hence I should not have a second baby (we were planning on trying for second child this year). This has really affected me as in 2028 I will be 44. He even said that I already have one child and now is the best time for contemplation not to be greedy to want more.

I don't know what I should do as I'm afraid that if I wait till I'm 44 I will be too old to gave a child and might not be able to conceive. Also frankly I'd rather have my second child soon as don't want a big age gap between my two children.

I know I sound really stupid but I don't know what I should do. Do I follow what the astrologer has said or do I do what I want.

Im afraid that if I go ahead and try for a child Im taking a risk and my life can get rocky again. Im actually incredibly anxious now.

My parents/friends/family aren't the sort who believe in astrology. I did some googling and found this astrologer so was not someone recommended to me. I tried another astrologer who said that my husband will cheat on me in a few years time which I'm gobsmacked by as my DH is a good man. And now I'm paranoid.

Any advice or anyone who has been in a similar position before? Thank you.

You are wise to look at other areas to support yourself, but it's not silly to try to get some support it's just a bit rubbish that these people will take advantage of someone when they're vulnerability.

I have used astrology as a tool to support or help with understanding where I am in my life & what could have been the underlying factors that brought me to that point.
I wouldn't worry about what this person said to you about having another child, try & put it out of your head because it's up to you, & they really can't be saying stuff like that, it's unhelpful & should never be like that.

On another's note have you tried a diary? I rediscovered this a couple of years ago & find it really helps when I'm struggling with something, you write really well & while it's quite an old fashioned way to work out problems I've found it more helpful than talking to someone. That said you could give CBT a go see if that helps.

@Messyhair321 A diary is a good idea, I used to write in a gratitude journal many moons ago and it was impactful.
I've since blocked the astrologer on WhatsApp and will not be consulting one.

There's a lot of value in astrology as can be seen with how you've used it. The problem is finding a decent one!

Hi OP, I consulted astrologers for many years. One lady in particular was one of the best, very sought after and a lovely person, and became a bit of a friend for a while. BUT she always made it very plain that events happen in their own time, and refused to put a timescale on things. So the definite timings in your predictions alone strike me as a red flag - so does the definite advice, a reputable astrologer just doesn't work like that. ALSO, the two main things she predicted in my life, as well as many minor ones, never happened! (Going back more than ten years now - of course the 'no timing' is a great get out clause...)

Looking back, it was fun, and comforting at the time, when I wanted a bit of extra attention, so the 'mothering' was valuable, but the predictions were all rather general and as if cut out to fit someone who wasn't me. I needed it at the time, but that time is past ( it also didn't influence any decisions I made.) I realised you can't live life on standby, waiting for what might happen, and half relying on someone else's authority - you need to respect your own.

I also realised that with the best intentions and principles, these people are running a business. A regular customer is a gift.

Put the money you're spending on astrologers into a baby fund. Start looking at baby clothes and thinking about baby equipment. Trust the universe, and trust yourself to create your own future. You know your path better than anyone else - go for it!

Hi OP, I got a bit lost in astrology at a time in my life when my mental health was very poor and I was, looking back on it, desperate for someone to tell me what to do. Through therapy I am able to see that this was because I didn't have a secure base of my own through which to make decisions. This is due to my past history. It has take a lot of work but I feel far less inclined to look to someone else to dictate my life now. I can see that getting lost in a more spiritual world was an attempt to escape from my personal difficulties. It has been difficult to face it but my emotional health is more stable now and less reliant on others. Good luck.

I follow an astrologer on Twitter for the laughs.

According to her, Charles would never be king, we should be in the middle of a massive deadly pandemic and Italy would have left the EU.

Has any of this happened?

No.

They're abusers who make money out of abusing and defrauding/manipulating vulnerable people and you were primed as a child to seek abusers out. Probably felt very familiar, the uncertainty/unease about what they were saying but their confidence and insistence that if you didn't comply that Bad Things Would Happen? Did you ever try and bargain in your head that if you did something, your father would be kind to you and if he still wasn't, look for something else that had made that happen?

Not your fault. Get therapy and don't go anywhere near magical thinking like that again.

I nearly didn't date again my now DH ( been together 5 half years) because of what a 'fortune teller ' told me. I saw her on Facebook a few years ago sadly talking about her abusive partner , so she's not that pyschic ( and im not dismissing DV - had it myself)

Why are you taking advice about conceiving a child from an astrologer ..,,
You mention some pretty traumatic stuff, you’d be better off seeing a counsellor to work that through.
Quit seeing the astrologer bloke!

omg .....prayers prayers prayers

Why would you go to someone who doesn't know you spins lines and makes your future even worse lol boggles me. Make your own future do what you want be happy

I am into astrology but with it you have to have free will. You can’t just expect that your chart will provide so waiting around for your planets to move into a more favourable position is where you will miss out on life.

Ultimately it’s about living your life and being aware that things are going to be tough but eventually things will become better

A bit like not trying to climb up the corporate ladder because in 5 years time your chart reads that you are going to get a big promotion. And in 5 years time your promotion could be to supervisor of your department whilst if you had been slowly climbing up and bettering yourself the big promotion could mean you are made a director

With sites like Astrotheme and Astro and a bit of googling you can look up things yourself

I must admit that I could see huge issues in my own transit chart and try as I might I tried to put everything into place to guard against things. But ultimately it did say I needed to move house and I needed to do it in a certain timeframe or I would end up losing everything,
I did sell up just before interest rates started to rise and looking back I would have lost the house by now

if you have your accurate birth time and place then you can get your birth chart.

A trusted and very good astrologer, a friend of the family, told me that me and (let's call him) Fred were perfect. Our charts were perfectly aligned and she had never seen two people more suited.

Spoiler: he was a twat and I divorced him.

You are trying to manage your anxiety by outsourcing your peace of mind. If you're going to do that, it should be to a lovely caring counsellor.

I went to school with a woman who was a convincing compulsive liar as a teenager. She became a private appointment astrologer and is married to a 'clairvoyant' they are very rich and have even benefited from inheriting a clients estate. This is a manipulative liar you need to see for who they are

Thank you for your responses, I struggle with very bad anxiety and seeing an astrologer was a way for me to prevent something bad happening. My mental health is very poor and I'm not sure what to believe - I've talked myself out of the astrology but still have moments where I spiral thinking about his predictions of "bad times" ahead. I really do struggle.

How can a chart tell you that you need to move house? Genuine question!

Thank you very much, this is how I feel.

Ignore the astrologer. Have your 2nd baby and be happy!. Babies don't need as much money as people make out. We were really poor when I was growing up but I was a happy child.

Thank you ❤️

Do what you want to do. Take absolutely no notice of what an Astrologist tells you. Astrology uses your date of birth to form a chart for you. Statistically you share the same birth date with 20 million other people world wide. So that reading you had done also applies to them.All 20 million of them , utter rubbish. Ignore it and do what you want to do

How can a chart tell you that you need to move house? Genuine question

tbh at the time I was looking ahead at the next year or 2 and had no intention of moving house. I thought all the things that it was forecasting as I have always been careful with money and Dh was in a safe job till retirement, dc all were on course for being financially ok

Then Covid hit and we all lost our jobs. We as a family collectively had no money coming in and circumstances meant we needed to sell otherwise we would end up losing the house.

That was when I checked out my chart and whilst there was a wide window of when it would be better to sell (astrology doesn’t say you have to do anything but it advises what would be the better time to do something) and if I tried to hold on then I would end up losing everything.

As it was we sold within the time frame but I must admit that if I had hung on for another few weeks then yes I would have lost it all.

I use astrology as an advisor if I have to make a decision. It is about having free will to do a parachute jump but if your transit chart says that a certain day there will mechanical failures or you are more prone to accidents happening then maybe book the jump for the week after

I would go ahead and have a baby. You know it is financially going to be a tough time (I think it is for a lot of people) so just be an extra bit cautious with your finances. I.e kit out the nursery with freebies from FBMP as opposed to getting everything brand new and save as much money as you can, where you can

itsjustmeBobby A proper natal chart is unique to you. It is about not just your date of birth but also your year of birth, your exact time of birth and where you were born.

Even twins who are born even 60 seconds apart don’t share those specifics

I went to see a couple of fortune tellers out of curiosity when I was ttc. I'd ignore anything they say. If they'd been able to predict my dh would die suddenly, Id have insisted he get checked out and treated and he might still be here now. It's a load of rubbish in my opinion.

astrology isn’t fortune telling

The one the op saw was claiming to be able to predict her future. That's what I call fortune telling. I can't remember what the ones I saw were using to predict my future. (Or not predict it in my case)