Astrologer getting in my head

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I'm in my late 30s, married with a loving DH (my 2nd marriage) and my DC is a toddler. Decent paying job albeit intense.

Prior to this I had a rocky life - suffered child abuse till I was 12, emotional abuse from ex-DH.
For the first time in my life I'm in a good place however I have great anxiety about the future and having the happiness that I have now taken away from me. I can't stop worrying and embarrassingly have started consulting an astrologer in the hope of getting some sort of reassurance that my future will be ok.

Unfortunately the astrologer i consulted has said that from now till 2028 I will have a rocky time financially and with my DH hence I should not have a second baby (we were planning on trying for second child this year). This has really affected me as in 2028 I will be 44. He even said that I already have one child and now is the best time for contemplation not to be greedy to want more.

I don't know what I should do as I'm afraid that if I wait till I'm 44 I will be too old to gave a child and might not be able to conceive. Also frankly I'd rather have my second child soon as don't want a big age gap between my two children.

I know I sound really stupid but I don't know what I should do. Do I follow what the astrologer has said or do I do what I want.

Im afraid that if I go ahead and try for a child Im taking a risk and my life can get rocky again. Im actually incredibly anxious now.

My parents/friends/family aren't the sort who believe in astrology. I did some googling and found this astrologer so was not someone recommended to me. I tried another astrologer who said that my husband will cheat on me in a few years time which I'm gobsmacked by as my DH is a good man. And now I'm paranoid.

Any advice or anyone who has been in a similar position before? Thank you.

Do what you want.

Let's say your astrologer is right (they probably aren't). You can survive rocky finances but there's nothing to say your finances will get better and stay stable after you're 44. Babies and children and adults survive rocky finances. If we waited until we were stable to have children, there would be far less babies in the world.

Your husband may cheat on you. Good men cheat all the time. But that's not now. Now your husband loves you, your relationship is happy and stable and you both want a child.

All we can ever do is live in the present. The world could end tomorrow. You may never make it to 44. You may make it to 94 and be financially secure the entire time. Nobody knows. Not even the astrologers.

So do what makes you happy and PLEASE see a therapist about your worries about the future. You control your destiny, not the planets.

Would you be able to afford an astrologer and a baby? If finances are a concern and I’m an astrologer trying to secure my wage I know what advice I would be giving you. Live your life and try for your baby. Give up the astrologer.

Astrologers are full of stories, ie lies. It’s not true OP. None of what they’ve said is true. They make money out of this shit.

Astrology is for entertainment only. A therapist would be a worthy use of your money - not these charlatans.

Please feel totally confident to dismiss what they’ve said.

Please, please, please don't be taken in by this person - one step up from a medium or a palm reader. No one - NO ONE - can predict accurately what will happen tomorrow, never mind in the next five years.

Ask yourself this question - why are you relying on this person for guidance rather than your own almost 40 years of experience?

Someone I used to work with was really into this kind of thing, absolutely convinced that the readings she got were accurate. What she failed to see was that she changed her plans to replicate the future she was forecast.

She would be told she shouldn't make any big changes so she'd stop looking for a new job for example, then tell everyone how right her forecast was because she hadn't taken made any big changes and her life had stayed happy.

Don't let someone else influence your life, if you want another child then have one.

I mean it doesn't really take rocket science to predict that many people will suffer financial hardship for the next few years - does it ?? Sorry but just do what you want to do.

Unfortunately the astrologer i consulted has said that from now till 2028 I will have a rocky time financially and with my DH hence I should not have a second baby (we were planning on trying for second child this year). This has really affected me as in 2028 I will be 44. He even said that I already have one child and now is the best time for contemplation not to be greedy to want more.

EVERY ONE of child bearing age is likely to be having a rocky financial time in the near future. And that means that EVERYONE that age who is looking for stability/ security in their life (and that's anyone who will see an Astrologer) will maybe give pause about having a second child for financial reasons.

Astrologers play the odds. They know what is likely for people of a certain age so trot out these cliches safe in the knowledge there's a fair chance they will hit the mark.

Because they are con artists who play on anxieties.

The astrologer has probably told half a dozen women your age the same thing this week.

It's not even one step up from palm reading. It's all bollocks.

OP, no-one can predict the future. Stop wasting your money and making yourself anxious over nothing.

Have a child, or don't have a child - it's entirely up to you and your partner.

Thank you for your advice and kindness.

A big part of me has trouble accepting that I'm worth good things. I find familiarity in my life being hard as that's what most of my life has been like hence I turned to astrology which you are all right - its nonsense.

There were a couple of things that were so ambiguous/untrue example he told me that I had a very difficult time giving birth to my DC but not true at all if anything it was such a positive experience.

I will look for a therapist instead as the astrology has badly messed with my mind and at one point I was telling myDH that I'm certain he will cheat on me.

I'm a believer but I still take things about the future with a pinch of salt. I wouldn't plan my life or make decisions off of what they said. What happens happens.

Thank you, I need to trust myself more.

OP, I believe in all kinds of spiritual stuff. Good astrologers would never say things like "your husband is going to cheat on you 5 years from now." That's not how astrology works. It is a sign that you're dealing with an "astrologer" who is wanting to create anxiety in you so that you hand over more of your power and money.

If you believe in what they tell you, you will create a self-fulfilling prophecy, where you're expecting your husband to cheat and that will push him away.

Please put these ridiculous predictions in the bin.

Thank you! You're so right, people survive rocky finances!

Astrologers are nothing more than charlatans, and like other such people (eg clairvoyants) should come with a disclaimer that they are for entertainment purpose only.

Seek help from a qualified therapist or trusted friend and do not let your life be dictated by this fraud who has zero interest in your well-being.

I will, thank you!
I have to confess I've been consulting two different astrologers since last October and it has made my mental health worse.

When there's childhood abuse or neglect you can develop negative core beliefs - the way you think about yourself, others and the world at large. Have a read of this article to better understand how they work and, crucially, how you can change the way you think;

https://www.betterrelationships.org.au/well-being/core-beliefs-self-acceptance/

I believe in all sorts of spirituality including astrology but I know of no astrologer who would ever say x will happen. Difficulties can arise when planets are in challenging placements to your birth chart but those are to be taken note of and navigated the way you want to with the information given.

It's a general map of the land, not a detailed itinerary. You choose your path.

You are worthy of good things for the very reason you're insecure - you look after them and know them when you have them. Many people don't see what good they have in their lives and complain solely about the things they don't have. You know you're now happy and obviously don't want to lose it. The astrologer you saw is playing on your fears for cash, not giving you the general advice needed to navigate life on a spiritual path.

Please please disregard these people.

Thank you for sharing this with me. I will read it.

Childhood trauma is hard to shake off. My parents would hit me a lot even for small things. As an example when I was 7, my dad threatened to pour the water in my water bottle on my head in front of my friends if I didn't finish all the water by EOD. I was also beaten with a belt. I've since tried to forgive and make peace with how I was treated by my parents but the feeling of being insignificant and not being able to trust myself is something I struggle to shake off.

I appreciate you sending this my way

Thank you ! I will disregard the astrology, this thread is helping.

The astrologers focus was so much on how challenging my planets are and as such I should not do anything etc. he certainly wasn't talking about navigation.

I know I will regret it if I listened to an astrologer and waited till I'm in my mid 40s to try for a baby - and I could not get pregnant.

I feel stupid for spending so much £ on astrology now!

I also believe in spirituality etc , but this sound like utter tosh.
They can't tell you stuff like this as PP as said
Delete
I read about someone who worked for an online astrologist - they admitted they made it all up.
Think about what you truly want and then make plans to get it.

Don't feel stupid. Astrologers, like clairvoyants etc prey on people who might be a bit lost, looking for direction, missing loved ones, etc, that's what makes them particularly scummy in my book, they take advantage of people.

Not many people use astrologers.

So when an astrologer finds a willing mark, who seems to believe, they will latch on.

So you are the cash cow, maybe coming two or three times a year. A few hundred pounds.

What is the first frivolous expense likely to be cut if you have a baby? The astrologer.

So the astrologer says don't cut off my money have a baby.

Thank you. I'm finding it hard to break the habit as I'm so paranoid about my future. I've made the conscious decision to not consult with astrologers and slowly weaning myself off googling my horoscope.

I clearly need a therapist

Hi I am sorry you had this experience, I am also quite into astrology BUT it isn't right that you can predict things that these astrologers have said to you, they simply cannot predict that sort of thing. A key aspect in anyone's life is that they have free choice, and no one can be as accurate as to say that your DH will cheat on you or that you will struggle financially (except that most people are at the moment so its not much of a prediction anyway!).

If you are into this sort of thing I would just learn about it yourself, I have also consulted an astrologer in the past, especially when I have been struggling, mine is also a counsellor, and would absolutely never make these sort of predictions, she would look holistically and for the positives that are going to help. And would listen to my story. It sounds like your readings were a nonsense, sorry you wasted your time and money OP.

Thank you for your message xx
I'm someone who suffers from low self esteem and negative thoughts about myself so it's unfortunately easy for me to believe an astrologer when he paints a negative picture about my future. TBH I'm so silly to have randomly found them on the internet.

I'm not even aware of how astrology is meant to help - is it meant to help navigate more than predict?
What upset me the most was when he said I should delay having a baby till much later (which would mean I'd be in my 40s) and I thought to myself - do I want to believe some random astrologer and risk not being able to conceive.

I'm so ashamed to have wasted money on this. I've decided to look into CBT instead as I clearly need to sort my head out 😞