One major reason for poor mental health is some people want to see you suffer, surrender and die?

[Dailymenu]

Anyone have insight on this that they'd be willing to comment on? Despite being resilient and doing everything- and beyond - of what is required of me in every aspect of my life, I feel I'm still not making headway. I'm a good mother, hard worker and keep myself to myself and even that is not valued. I have been to hell and back.

Advice on the thread title and the sub context is appreciated.

Poor mental health as in what's the point in trying to add value when it seems not to be utilised? I have done everything that has been thrown my way and successfully

Very difficult to prove though?!

i also think you are taking this completely out of proportion.

You not getting the job is not an existential/Total War attack on you, and going straight to cronyism as the reason will prevent you from analyzing whether there might be any validity in their decision. (e.g. what if the feedback was “We feel you are prone to catastrophising, and reacting negatively to small setbacks”).

it is obvious that your life is hard at the moment, and you do definitely have a lot on your plate. But, this rejection could be a springboard to redouble your efforts on the things which will get you out of there (the driving license!)

Don’t look for support on here. Instead of supporting you, they will ask you a million and one question without offering a word of support.

As the previous poster said; better days are coming. The world is filled with wicked people. Being an immigrant is also hugely unpopular in the UK. So it’s not uncommon to face unkindness and unfairness. You sound resilient and someone who knows themselves well.

You should keep on keeping on. Keeping surviving and focus on thriving despite those who would rather put barriers in your way.

If you believe in a higher power, find solace there.

Best of luck.

The only time I’ve felt people wanted me to suffer and die was when I was being bullied at school and then when I was in the depths of severe depression and not thinking rationally. Nothing you’ve said equates to people wanting you to suffer and die. I went for several internal promotions in my last job and didn’t get them. That’s life, it’s often unfair. I’m guessing this is the tip of the iceberg though. Saying you want the job for more money isn’t never going to go down well in an interview though no matter how true it might be.

It's not just the job though. And yes, i already have plans to start up booster driving lessons and pass my test. Like I said,I also support my DP.

I realise this all wrt going for the interview. There's more going on as you say

OP it sounds to me that youve done a fantastic job of pulling yourself up out of a difficult situation. And maybe you are feeling unappreciated/unsupported from people above eg by your seniors at work. Sounds like a visit home to your parents who care about you is a wonderful idea.
Then you can regroup and think about your next steps eg how to fund the driving and how to move jobs.
But don't overthink in the meantime just enjoy your trip!

Thank you. I realise I have blown this up but I do think I need to step back at work as they want their pound of flesh but don't give a fuck to give proper recognition - I effectively haven't got a pay rise for doing double the work. But that's life.

You sound somewhat paranoid, as if there is a big conspiracy against you.
The likely reality is that most people just aren’t invested enough to want you to suffer etc, you probably aren’t important enough to them.
Your lack of success/happiness etc is more likely down to internal rather than external factors

Your parents need to be responsible for themselves. Pull back and start focusing, really focusing on your own life. I am assuming they want the best for you, but you can’t be everything to everyone.

I find channeling energy into one area only makes all the difference, in your case I’d totally focus on passing your driving test, then you will have more job opportunities and a better quality of life.

just break down your goal, cost it out - make a plan and then you show some determination. Don’t book travel tickets or get way laid. Laser focus. Start looking after yourself more. The rest will follow 💐💐

So if they don’t recieve UC and CM, they get promotions?

Thank you x

No

I think people need to take charge of their mental health .

Remove yourself from anyone toxic .
If you are in a job you hate you aren't in prison change it .

People at my work off with MH are themselves toxic , nasty , negative , mistrustful . Happy to try and drag colleagues down with them .The very characters most of us work hard to avoid .

All of this is not easy but people need to take charge of their lives , counselling / support where necessary but I'd guess if some people thought about the positives they can change most things in their life to increase their mental well-being .

This

I've booked my tickets and the by next year won't afford it with the way things are going. When I return I will book my driving test and focus wholly on that

No as in “no people don’t get promotions if work know they receive uc and cm?”

To be fair

when you are a single parent, making big changes is often logistically very difficult

I don't hate my job. I actually love it and the people I work with. Management employ friends and family of friends, etc

It's a driving factor

That's a comment from a classic narc.

Is it?!! How do they know this? This is extremely bizarre.

My first priority is my DC. So yes, I cannot make huge or rapid changes, especially as I am literally all on my own.

Because I am a single parent and single income household? Surely that's not hard to deduce?

Let's fuck over the most vulnerable in society and blame them for it .... who are you that you do understand this simple concept