My husband has always been the 'bread winner' of the family, he is usually motivated, always on the go sorting things and never one to sit around watching tele. He seemed to be quite resilient and never mentioned any struggles with his mental health until just after we had our third child.
A few months after we had our third child in October 2021 his mental health took a turn for the worst, he went from crying three times in seven years to crying continuously throughout the day everyday. He never had motivation to do anything and was always down. He had very graphic visions of awful things happening to the kids and he thought he was dying, then he was convinced I was dying. However he went on tablets for a while and seemed to be getting back to his normal self however he still never really seemed to be getting pleasure out of anything.
He stopped his tablets after about a month (I wanted him to continue them but he'd googled and didn't like the side effects) but now he's going in a downwards spiral again, he's always miserable, anxious, not really enjoying spending time with the children or doing things we used to do. He doesn't even seem to like going to the pub with friends anymore. Every time I bring it up with him he says he's going to exercise and change his diet and try to get better but I'm yet to see him do anything about it.
I know I sound really really selfish as mental health is such a hard thing to deal with but it's really affecting me now and our home life with our children. I want to be out doing stuff with them and I want our home to be happy for them again. I feel very alone. He went away with work for one night and when he came back this evening I realised it was nicer without him in the house 😩
I love my husband I just really miss the old him and I don't know what to do about it.
Sorry if this doesn't make sense but I just really needed some advice