Emetophobia - terrified of this sickness bug

[nellyraggbagg]

This sounds so stupid, but I'm completely terrified of the children (not to mention DH and me) catching this Norovirus that's doing the rounds. I've been emetophobic for as long as I can remember, and it has become even worse since having children. Every time they open their mouths, I'm terrified they're going to say they feel sick. When I go to bed at night, my last waking thought is: "Oh my God, what if they're sick in the night?" My DH is working away a lot at the moment, which makes matters even worse (he is good at dealing with sick, thank goodness!!) I have dealt with both children being sick (I have found that manic cleaning helps very slightly to take my mind off the blind panic), but am rigid with fear following newspaper reports of this current bug. How will I pick DS up from school if DD and/or I get it? My Mum is miles away, unfortunately. And what if DH gets it? I don't know how I'd cope if he were sick. Please, please help, someone - even if just by saying that I'm not the only person who feels like this!

I've had it, and DS had it (he's only 5 weeks). Dh didn't get it. Its horrid but manageable. I know you are phobic of it, but if you do get it, I'm sure your motherly instincts will kick in and you'll cope against adversity. Try not to worry, I don't think its as common as the media say it is.

Well we've survied another 24 hours without D and V. DS home from school no one sick from his class thank heavens. DH taking them swimming tommorow!!!

I've only had this problem since the birth of DD3 11 weeks ago. Not phobic of being sick in any other way only the fear of sickness bug. DH is convinced I've got postnatel depression.

Seeing doctor on Monday what will she think?

DS and DD2 no longer need prompting to wash hands (i doubt they do it when I'm not around though) I fear that I'm passing this on to them so in order to cover up my anxtious behaviour I think I coming over slightly hysterical you know big grin high pitched happy voice.

Someone was sick at DS's school today. Argh. Someone was absent from his class, which sent me into a panic - turns out he had a temperature...

Oh god how awful nelly. I question my kids and other parents in playground about whos sick when they were sick ect ect.

Do you convince yourself that you feel unwell and it's the sickness bug? I do and pray for the next day to arrive hopefully bug free! God it's so irrational and in one breath I can be rational but 1 second later I'm in a state again....

Right guys opinions. DS 3 is due to go to a party at the house of a child who had the bug over christmas. The party is tomorrwo I am terrified he will touch something that has the virus on and infect him self. He is a great thumb sucker feel really mean not taking him he knows the family well

Oooh, what a horrible dilemma, ineedapoo. When did the child have the bug? If it was more than 10 days or so, I'd cross my fingers and go for it - unless, of course, all his family have come down with it since then... If the general advice is that children can go back to school after 48 hrs of no symptoms, then a week or so (assuming nobody else in his family has had it) should be long enough for the virus to die off??

notalone: sorry, I just noticed I didn't reply to your question. Yes, we're kind of neighbours!! My sister's DP lives in SW Sheffield - not sure which hospital he works at, though.

DS is going swimming tomorrow, so that's a new cause of anxiety - can't help but feel that, as people have paid for swimming lessons in advance, they'll send children even if they're ill!!

DS's school newsletter today came with a warning about norovirus, saying that they're reminding children to wash their hands and not put their fingers in their mouths. That is some tiny consolation! DS also said they were not allowed to share recorders because of 'nasty bugs'...

Which reminds me: we went to a friend's house for lunch a while back, and she allowed her children to lick the spouts of juice, chocolate sauce etc - and then offered them to my DCs. I went into serious panic mode - esp. when she emailed me the following day to say that her DS had come down with d&v. Presumably he wasn't contagious the day before - but I did feel cross about it. Same person invited us in when we were delivering Christmas cards - then said: "Oh, we've all got gastric flu, but we're probably not contagious" !!!! I remembered a sudden appointment!!!!!

They have been better since 1/1/08 think we might go but wash our hands a lot

If they've all been ok since then, I think I'd do the same (at least if they've already had it, they can't be incubating it!!)

DD has suddenly got very nasty runny poo. I am on high alert.

Now she's got a temp of 102. I am hyperventilating!!

oh god nelly...i feel your panic... fwiw, ds almost always starts his bugs with runny poo... i have everything crossed for you that this is a different type of bug (of which there are loads doing the rounds at the moment). i may be wrong but i don't think noro starts with a fever, think it often comes on later.

thinking of you. will keep checking in for updates. be strong nelly (and don't forget to breathe)

eek. I have chickened out and have handed her over to DH (thank goodness it's the weekend). I keep reminding myself that everyone says that noro begins with sudden v-ing rather than runny poo. And I do need to remember that noro isn't the only tummy bug in the world (DD got rotavirus including the vomiting bit on my birthday two years ago, would you believe - I am still traumatised). She may just have one of the usual low-grade-ish bugs that do the rounds. Or so I'm trying to tell myself as I sit in the spare room in a panic, not daring to go downstairs for fear of what I'll find!!!

what a birthday present! ds came down with rotavirus while asleep in his puschair whilst we were out on a very long walk a very long way from home last March or so. Suffice to say it was not a pretty sight and i was not a pretty state. And, although the gp told me not to worry as we have all had it as children and therefore have immunity i came down with it a few days later... thankfully the v bit wasn't too violent at all (mainly horrendous nausea). but oh my god the d bit...

i digress. i hope you are remembering to breathe there in the spare room. and i hope you have a magazine or other distraction in there too, to try and take your mind off what might be going on downstairs. but to me (an professional emetophobe) it really doesn't sound like noro...

breathe breathe breathe

Thinking of you nelly. I do believe the worst bugs start with v and then d to follow up. My kids have had d lots of times with no v, so fingers crossed for you all.

Would you consider going downstairs, on the understanding that you can remove yourself to another room if v. starts, or even if it seems imminent?

The first thing my therapist asked me to work on, from very first session, was to "Stop checking". Ie. to stop counting the number of children in and out of dc's classes, and resist the urge to question mums/teachers/your own children about what they are "off sick" with.

Its because you are seeking reassurance, BUT if you hear the child has some kind of v bug, you don't get reassured at all - you just go into higher anxiety. And the checking/asking does not change anything.

Could see sense in it and am trying.

Well, I did venture downstairs, and found both DCs building a sofa house and leaping around pulling imaginary crackers, while DH read the paper (!!) I'm now going to Sainsbury's - DH did volunteer, but I fear being left alone with DCs (even though they're in bed).

DaphneHarvey - your therapist is of course quite right. I do check on all the illnesses for reassurance - then, of course, it has completely the opposite effect if it turns out that someone has got a sick-bug. When I saw the norovirus headline in the local paper, that really set me off worrying - but, of course, if I hadn't been passing the newsagent at that moment, I'd never have known about it - yet the risk (or non-risk) would have been exactly the same.

We have had quite a few d bugs (DS's version of rotavirus was just the D bit, thank goodness).

Now here's a really weird question: I am (slightly) even more phobic about DS v-ing than about DD v-ing. What on earth is that about????? And as for DH: if he v-d, I think that would just about make me leave home!!

I think I might try to get referred for CBT. It certainly can't harm. I did once read a magazine article about a woman who was so phobic that she made her children stand outside if they felt sick, and wouldn't let them back inside until they felt better. I like to think that I could never get to that stage, but I can also see how somebody could get there. She had CBT, and it worked well for her - to her immense relief...

Oh nelly, I think they are going to be alright. (and even if they aren't you'll all survive etc etc)

Know what you mean about DH v-ing. I put this high on the scale of anxietying, but not quite as high as if I get it.

Its all about me this thing. Contradicts with my instincts as a parent, which is what makes it worse somehow. Ie. am a good mum and put my kids first as is only right and proper, but if they are sick I am heading for the door. If they make me sick, I am questioning my decision to have them at all. And so on.

The guilt makes it all worse.

Nelly I share your panic we wnt to the party on the way home ds who is 3 said my tummy hurts. I panic. hand him party bag and say put sick in that he says can't be sick on cake. Drive home very quickly. 2 lots of D at 6.30pm now fast asleep help ***

help ds has just woken up crying saying his tummy hurts

help ds has just woken up crying saying his tummy hurts

oh, you poor, poor thing. It's all very well for me to say, as I'd be in screaming pianic mode if I were you - but you will get through it, whatever it is. My fingers are v v v v v firmly crossed for you. If I can send anti-v vibes your way, I am doing it one hundred percent.

Thankyou nally I am hoping he has just eaten too much

Keep remembering that norovirus doesn't start with D, but V!! That's what I keep telling myself, anyway. With a bit of luck, he'll be fine in the morning.
The 'not being sick on the cake' story reminds me that when DS actually was sick (aged 3 - a bad day, etched on my memory), I told him that if he needed to do it again, he should do it into his cuddle blanket rather than all over the car. I thought I was trying to be rational and practical, but he has never forgiven me!!!

oh god, ineedapoo. am thinking of you too and sening anti v vibes your way too. as has been mentioned on this thread, it seems the dreaded noro starts with sudden v (rather than tummy ache and some d) so here's hoping that your ds just has a bad case of too much cake/jelly/party sandwiches etc.

nelly, so glad things seem a little calmer in the nelly house...

daphneharvey, i could have written your last post myself (if only i was that eloquent). so well put and so true.

it was exactly this time last week that i was in panic mode with dh feeling green... and this time next week we fly to south africa. now if a 12 hour airplane fkight isn't a breeding ground for noro i don't know what is...

flight, even.

x post with nelly.

Oh Zonedout how do you cope the flight I am always terrified of travel sickness and watch other ppeople like a hawk ds is asleep again fingers crossed