Emetophobia - terrified of this sickness bug

[nellyraggbagg]

This sounds so stupid, but I'm completely terrified of the children (not to mention DH and me) catching this Norovirus that's doing the rounds. I've been emetophobic for as long as I can remember, and it has become even worse since having children. Every time they open their mouths, I'm terrified they're going to say they feel sick. When I go to bed at night, my last waking thought is: "Oh my God, what if they're sick in the night?" My DH is working away a lot at the moment, which makes matters even worse (he is good at dealing with sick, thank goodness!!) I have dealt with both children being sick (I have found that manic cleaning helps very slightly to take my mind off the blind panic), but am rigid with fear following newspaper reports of this current bug. How will I pick DS up from school if DD and/or I get it? My Mum is miles away, unfortunately. And what if DH gets it? I don't know how I'd cope if he were sick. Please, please help, someone - even if just by saying that I'm not the only person who feels like this!

Gosh - I think I must be ill cos I am here again!!!! Wiggleit - wake up - I am sorry I have caused you to fall into a dead faint with my very active presence lately

I would love to lead you astray over a few drinks. It would be soooo nice to meet someone just like me (only a bit madder lol!)Lets arrange something! xxx

Nelly - how are you? Are you still feeling anxious? The waiting is the worst isn't it?
I didn't know you were originally from Sheffield! Where did you used to live and where are you now? I think I remember you saying you were near Leeds - am I right? Hope it is all ok for you and that you have a peaceful night

Hi, i also have a terrible fear of vomiting and feel that nobody understands how bad this is for me. I feel ashamed of myself as i think that this fear affects my children. My main concern is actually being sick myself although i obviously hate to see my kids suffer. Anyway, a month ago my ds, 15 months had a stomach bug. He vomitted on and off for 12 hours and also had three bouts of diahorreah during that time.
I breastfeed him so continued to do that but he still became dehydrated and ended up in hospital on a drip and then had to have a tube in his nose. The whole experience was terrifying. After 2 nights in hospital he was allowed home and started to pick up after a couple of days. For the whole time i was petrified that myself or my DD's or DP would come down with it, i was counting the hours away so that i could get past 48/72 hours. I was scared to eat and to go to sleep as waking up in the night feeling sick is just so scary to me. Well as it turned out my DS was the only one affected so i managed to relax again, but not for long, my DD aged 4 was sick on Sunday about 2 o'clock. Only once but quite a lot, infact to make matters worse she was sick on her little brothers back. I was a work at the time so my DP had to deal with it. Mot long after she vomited she wanted to eat something ao she had some toast and an apple, which she kept down.

When i got in from work she seemed fine but then she kept saying that she felt weird! She eventually fell asleep and has had no other bother and has been eating normally and running around as normal. So, today we were just getting to the 48 hour mark and i was begginning to relax a little and even thinking about starting to eat normally when my 2 year old grandson was sick in the town. We were'nt really all that close to him at the time but he had been at my house this morning for about 20 minutes or so this morning. I'm not too sure about how much contact he had with my DS but i'm so worried that my DS will get this bug again, don't know if i can cope if he ends up in hospital again. I'm scared to go to bed hence the reason i'm posting this so late. Its definately a bug that my grandson has as he vomited a few times in town and had diahorreah aswell. This fear is completely taking over my life.

Kaylasmum: you poor thing. We will all know exactly how you feel!

My DD ended up in hospital on a drip when she had rotavirus, and it was a horrible experience for everyone. DS had terrible diarrhoea at the same time, so DH and I had to take it in turns in the hospital, as DS couldn't go in for fear of infecting anyone else.

I shall have my fingers crossed that your DS doesn't come down with anything. My guess is that your grandson can't have passed anything on in that short time, especially if he hadn't had any symptoms then. But I would feel just the same!

The sick girl in my DS's class is at school today, which I'm really, really cross about . I "casually" asked her mum if she was better today, and her mum said she slept for the whole of the afternoon and night, and seems fine now. To me, that is not good enough!!! It may be that she has just had a mild version of a bug, but that she's going to pass it on to others who'll get a more violent form. And I can't understand anyway why a mum wouldn't want to keep her at home just to make sure she's okay anyway. She's a full-time mum, so she wouldn't be missing a day's work/pay by doing it. I just don't get it!

If DS comes down with a sick bug in time for his birthday on Tuesday, I will be really, really annoyed...

Notalone - ah, yes, I am a real Sheffielder. I spent my entire childhood in Dore, and my sister still lives in Ecclesall. Sheffield is still my favourite place - we tried to move back a year or so ago, but it was even more expensive than Leeds!

thanks Nelly for your reply, i eventually went to bed at about 3.30 and had about 4 hours sleep, still too scared to eat. So far so good, but the slightest little cough puts me on edge. My DD is still complaining every now and then that she fees "weird"! Cant get her to explain what that means but i'm worried that she's picking up on my anxieties. I feel so bad, i have 5 kids and i suffered from depression on and off over the years and now my DD aged 23 has been diagnosed with bi-polar and my son aged 21 has mental health issues and is on anti-psychotic drugs and my 16 year old DD has very low self esteem and struggles a lot with certain things. I feel that this is a result of my depression and anxieties. I live for my kids and hate to think that i've done this to them.

When do you think i'll be able to stop worrying about my ds catching this bug, i would have thought that if he was going to pick it up then he would have by now especially as his sister was sick on him. But then its only been about 24 hours since he had contact with my grandson.

i totally agree with you about being angry at the mum that has sent her DD to school so soon after being ill. My DD was sick on Sunday afternoon and i'm not planning on putting her back to nursery until tomorrow, just to be on the safe side.

Hello Kaylasmum, welcome to our club! We all totally understand where you are coming from and how this fear affects your life.

I've also had this phobia for as long as i can remember and it affects lots of things about my life. I also hate night time and fear waking up feeling sick, hence have stayed awake many a night for as long as i can.

I think i would be as worried as you under the circumstances but try and keep it in perspective, your DD was only sick once and ate later and was ok so maybe that was just one of those things. As for your grandson, it doesn't sound like he had much time to have much contact with your DS if he was only there 20mins, plus he was ok when he was at yours. According to experts these bugs only become contagious when the symptoms start so hopefully he'll be ok. I have everything crossed for you and really am thinking of you and hoping everything will be ok. Please keep us informed.

You can always come on here anytime and get support, the girls on here are fab! I'll be around on and off this afternoon if you need to chat. xx

Notalone, i've only just come round from passing out! Is it really you or has someone nicked your name??

Let's meet up then chick, be nice to be in the company of someone who totally 'gets' me! Have you an e-mail address? I'll e-mail you my number. xx

wiggleit thanks for your reply, i really do try to look at this rationally but as you'll know sometimes the feelings overwhelm me and thats when i get into a blind panic and cant think straight or logically. I did'nt mention before that my grandson actually had diaorreah for a couple of days beforehand and i did say to my daughter that it wold be better if we stayed away from each other until we were sure that my dd and her son were ok. She said that he often has really runny nappies and put it down to the fact that he drinks quite a lot. We are both on a diet and she does'nt have scales and came round to mine to weigh herself. I said ok to her against my better judgement and now here i am worrying myself stupid! I think my daughter gets a bit annoyed with me when i say that if one of the kids have a bug then we should stay apart but i think its only sensible. My ds and my grandson really did'nt have much contact at all but still i'm worried. When do you think i'll be able to stop worrying so much. Its now 29 hours after he was at my house, what are the chances of my ds getting ill now.

Hello ,

I've been lurking on this thread for some time,but never posted before.I suffer from emetophobia,too,but only mildly now.Having had children seems to have improved matters.However,I do suffer from a phobia about dogs,which has been steadily getting worse,to the point that if I'm at home & hear a dog barking,I get the symptoms of a panic attack.

I underwent a course of hypnotherapy,which made absolutely no difference whatsoever.The guy treating me said that it usually works for most people,but in my case I was probably too anxious,as I had to deal with my fear every day,which is why it didn't work.You can imagine how low I felt hearing that.

Today I bit the bullet & saw the Senior Nurse Practitioner at my local G.P'S.I was shaking at the thought of telling someone about my silly phobia,but she couldn't have been nicer.She said that she completely understood why I reacted like I did,that it was the body's natural reaction to stress,& that she knew what it was like to suffer from an 'irrational fear'.She has prescribed Beta Blockers for short term help & put me down for a course of CBT.Apparently I can be seen in the surgery in less than a month.

I'm so relieved that she took me seriously & was understanding.I thought I'd post just to let you know that I was petrified of seeking help,but it was the best thing I could have done.I'm feeling far more positive about things now.

So,please don't let being thought silly stop you from getting help.They really have heard it all before.

Hi Kaylasmum, by the sounds of it i think your ds should be ok as they didn't have much contact. I do understand how uptight you're feeling as i would be exactly the same, i'm probably not the best person to ask about it because i am the most irrational person around! I'm always asking bb to help me rationalise things on here! I would say though that after 48hrs have passed i would feel more comfortable about things. I really feel for you hun and i'm always around at some point checking in on here. Try and not let things get out of perspective (easy for me to say huh?!) ..xx

Furious - i went to my doctor and tried to explain my phobia to her and was met with the response 'well no-one likes being sick' and made me feel like i was wasting her time. So I left it at that and thought i'd try another doctor but i really think i would benefit from some cbt. BB's relaying some things back to us from her treatment and i find it most helpful.

Furious - thanks for the encouragement. I keep chickening out of telling the GP for fear that she'll think I'm a nut!

Kaylasmum - hope everything is ok and that your DS hasn't shown any symptoms of illness. I'm still in a panic about the pesky girl in DS's class. She looked ok at picking-up time, but that's not much consolation to me!

Hello to everyone else!

Hi everyone. Nice to meet furiousgeorge and kaylasmum. Nelly doesn't your school have a 24/48 hour exclusion policy after V

Evening everyone, had company all night so haven't been able to be on mn

I'm about to turn in but just wanted to check on here before i do.

Kaylasmum - how you doing chick? How is ds? I'm sure he'll be fine! Thinking of you. xx

nite all xx

Well so far my DS has been fine, but of course still worrying to an extent. I had a terrible experience when i went into work yesterday, i work on a checkout and as soon as i sat down i felt so sick, i was sure i was going to throw up. I felt the panic starting to rise but took some deep breaths and it started to subside. I felt sick for about half an hour, all i could think of was "oh god! i'm getting this bug". Don't know what it was but i'm not feeling too great but that could be down to not sleeping much and barely eating for the past 3 days.

My grandson is still quite ill, thats 5 days of diahoreah now and he was still vomiting yesterday.

Almost 48 hours since my son had contact with my grandson, maybe i'll e able to relax over the next 24 hours.

Hang in there, Kaylasmum! I have my fingers firmly crossed for you...

Schmoo - yes, the school certainly does have an 48-hr exclusion policy following d or v, and reminds parents of this in the weekly newsletter. However, some parents still choose to ignore it. This really gets my goat!!!

Hi everyone..

Kaylasmum - glad all ok with your ds still, think you should be able to relax a bit more now. Maybe you felt ill because you've been so worked up these last few days, and also the not eating and not sleeping won't help! Hope you are feeling better. x

Nelly - i agree with you about the parens who choose to ignore the 48hr rule..it really winds me up! It's there for a reason, why can't they respect that?

Hope everyone else is ok! xx

parents even!

Argh. One of DS's friends came out of school as white as anything and looking very poorly. I quizzed his dad (as you do) and he apparently has bad tummy ache... I steered very clear of him on the way out - he had that dreadful Look about him (you know the kind of Look I mean). And another boy in the class apparently had d last night, but was at school today (he did seem perfectly okay, but still...). Guess what frame of mind I'm in now?!

It's the anniversary of DD v-ing on Saturday. Only an emet would know that...

Come home, DH!!!!!!!

Nelly you can do it go girl. Not long now.
I am feeling worried as well dropped ds (3 years) off at nursery just as another boy arriving V everywhere. His Mum looked most put out she would have to take him home and couldn't bring him to school tomorrow. I am so looking forward to the bank holiday no school etc for a few days

Hello and welcome Kaylasmum. You should be fine by now. I hope as the hours go by the worry starts to diminish. There should be less bugs around and less virilant ones too now that spring is here so I reckon you will be fine now. If you do need a rant or just want to express worry then this is the right place to do it.

Thanks you for you post FuriousGeorge - think you were very brave to seek help. I did it too and it was horrible because I thought they would think I was mad. Think its fab news re the CBT too - you will have to let us know how you get on when you go.

Wiggleit - hey! How are we going to exchange e-mail addresses? Are you on FB? I will try that CAT thing in a minute - have never done it before though so if nothing happens I have tried ok!! Where do you want to go? Do you promise you are not a hairy arsed trucker posing as a mum lol?!!!! xx

Not long to go now Nelly!!! Is he back tomorrow? I am the same about v anniversaries. (Hey - did anyone watch the apprentice last night - that would have been my idea for a greeting card lol) and am always quite superstitious about them too. For example I V'd in 2002 and then again in 2004, in 2006 I panicked all summer thinking it would happen to me again as it had been 2 years and there were 2 years between the last bouts.

How are you Schmoopoo??

Hey Wiggleit - I have just checked and you have to pay to join CAT and I am skint until at least the end of the week. Are you on the mumsnet page on facebook? xx

Evening all!

Nelly - Thinking of you, at least your DH will be home soon!

Schmoopoo - Poor you, i'd have died if i'd been there when the little boy v'd! aaarrgghh! Thinking of you too!

Notalone - not sure how we going to exchange details actually. If i went on the CAT thing, you could look me up couldn't you? I haven't gone on that but i may. I'm not on any facebook thing either coz as you know from before (if you remember) i'm computer illiterate! I didn't even know how to go on the daily page thing on here! (forgot what it's called) (how crap am i?) How do i get on the mumsnet page on facebook? And as for your question, yes i am hairy arsed but not a trucker! I promise i'll shave me bits tonight!! xx

Schmoo - poor you. I would not have been happy!!!!!

If we can get through the next few days without incident, I'll be hugely relieved. I hope today's poorly boy is kept off tomorrow for a very long weekend...

Does anyone think it's possible that ill girl on Tuesday and ill boy today is just a coincidence?! (Please?!)

Hi Wiggleit. Well if you shave yer ass I am sure that will be ok lol. Just don't bring your truck as we shall be drinking If you join facebook and request to join the mumsnet group (via search on left side of profile screen) you will have to wait a couple of days to be accepted, then we can find each other and send friend requests to exchange info. Hurry hurry - I want a drink or three with someone who understand my phobia!!! xx

Nelly - ill girl and ill boy may just be a co-incidence. Perhaps one of them usually walks to school but was driven and was car sick. Maybe they had eaten something dodgy? Maybe one of them was under the weather and was sick because of that (I know some people are sick a lot more than others). Do ill boy and ill girl know each other? Thinking of you. Let us know how you are getting on.

PS- I have a dodgy belly tonight and during my driving lesson I thought D might be coming on. Am in denial and a bit scared. Normally if I V it comes on very suddenly so do you think I will be alright? I am also hungry but my stomach still hurts.

Notalone - oooh, poor you, hope you are ok chick. Could it have been nerves?
Have you got an e-bay account? x