*Trigger warning* My Mum is trying to drive off to commit suicide I don't know what to do

[OriginalD0G]

My mum is disabled and was attacked horrifically by my "dad".

It's all a big mess police involved etc. She is really struggling whilst staying with me our house is tiny so she's in a caravan on my drive which is not at all ideal - all whilst he is in their house.

I went for a walk today and when I got back my mum was in a state and asking for car keys she wants to go and kill herself. She's begging me to let her go and is so distressed last time I called the gp who was useless I just do t know what to do to help her I can't cope with this I have 4 DC who already have enough on their plates and it would destroy all of us if she succeeded.

My head is a mess what can I do to help her?!

So sorry to hear this OP How is your mum doing now? I'm not sure which area you are in, but you could try calling a Mental Health Crisis Team within your area, they usually have an out of hours support line and can do home visits. They may provide some talking therapies or look at prescribing and/or adjusting any medications for your mum. Also, try and make the area your mum is staying in as safe and calm as possible - remove any medications, alcohol, etc. If the situation worsens, do call 999 again if necessary.

Mum feels that for now the crisis has passed and she is exhausted but says that when the feeling comes again she will have the number to hand.

It's so hard because I do totally understand and validate her feelings she has done nothing wrong, he's in her home that largely she paid for her home is also her hobby and livlihood in one whilst she is in a bloody caravan on my drive whilst also vulnerable to Covid and should be able to shield - it's wrong and she is right to be angry and I think this anger comes in waves she needs a coping strategy in that time. Her feelings are understandable. Hopefully if he gets a sentence we can get her home and that protected

So sorry to hear this Op. do you still feel she is at immediate risk? If so take her to A&E if it safe to do so.
If she doesn't want to talk to the police or paramedics then she might be willing to talk to the Samaritans? I would also suggest she/you contact the police tomorrow and ask for the victim support councillor to be in touch. Also touch base with her GP. She needs to be getting some support. Also escalate her situation with the council to try and get her housing.
Does she have any friends who know what ha been happening? Would she find it helpful to chat with them or even potentially stay with them for a while?

Sorry you're going through such a worrying time, OriginalD0G.

We're relieved that the immediate crisis seems to have passed, and we can see you're getting lots of good advice and support from other Mumsnetters here on your thread, but we just wanted to add a link to Mind's information on supporting someone who feels suicidal and this webpage on helping someone else seek help.

We really hope you're both okay.

So glad she's feeling a bit better OP.
Can she stay in your house? Does she need to be in the caravan?

Has she spoken to a solicitor about obtaining an occupation order?

Things are a lot better today and she has her counselling session today so really hopeful that it may help.

She doesn't need to be in the caravan although our house is way too small for even our needs and I think she enjoys being able to have her own space a bit I am constantly checking for bigger houses to rent but there's nothing out there. It's beyond shit. Covid also makes it so much harder

Unfortunately we have no other local family and any friends my mum has tried to make over the years have been pushed away by him. It's such a horribly hard situation and I feel so utterly useless.

I dont suppose it would be worth you appealing to your father's better nature ( assuming he has one) and asking him to leave the house op ?

Sadly he has no better nature. He is currently going between telling her she can have it he wants nothing. To he wants half of everything - some of the half being money that is if not legally but rightfully hers.

He won't leave because he is still holding out hope that she will come back. Whilst he has the house he still retains some power.