What did depression feel like for you?

[Vampyhooch]

Hi,

I think I’m suffering from depression. I just wanted to know other peoples experiences of it and what helped really. Feel awful.

I felt very flat no real emotion just . nothingness. I had councilling and ADs but I wasn't on them long. Get help speak to your Gp

@Mrsjayy

I felt very flat no real emotion just . nothingness. I had councilling and ADs but I wasn't on them long. Get help speak to your Gp

That’s how I feel. Really disconnected from myself and those around me. Just feel like I’m existing and can’t feel anything. Did you find the ads helped?

Yes they did help me through it I was prone to reactionary depression when I was younger so I can pinpoint triggers but initially I had no clue what was happening, it started after my first baby so pnd but it continued.

Anger. Exhaustion. Everything a huge and pointless effort. Knowing nothing would ever improve and the future was just darkness. Knowing I was rubbish. Wishing I didn't exist, moving to wanting to die, moving to planning how to die.

@Iwalkinmyclothing

Anger. Exhaustion. Everything a huge and pointless effort. Knowing nothing would ever improve and the future was just darkness. Knowing I was rubbish. Wishing I didn't exist, moving to wanting to die, moving to planning how to die.

What helped you through it?

Medication. SSRIs- fluoxetine has worked for me although I remember the dose being increased a few times until it worked properly, and last time I was unwell sertraline. Therapy is ok, but I do not do well with CBT and other kinds of therapy are harder to access. Mostly it was the meds. I think I would be dead if there were no antidepressants.

Suicidal despair. Every minute of the waking hours was pure torture. Antidepressants took this hell away.

I had no motivation and felt miserable. Just wanted to lie in bed and not see anyone, not think about anything, I barely had the focus to even watch tv. Had no appetite and ate one meal a day. Forcing myself to go out for a walk helped. I actually got a dog to encourage me to go out. After a while I pulled myself together enough to take up a hobby one night per week and that helped too.

@Davodia

I had no motivation and felt miserable. Just wanted to lie in bed and not see anyone, not think about anything, I barely had the focus to even watch tv. Had no appetite and ate one meal a day. Forcing myself to go out for a walk helped. I actually got a dog to encourage me to go out. After a while I pulled myself together enough to take up a hobby one night per week and that helped too.

Did you recover naturally or need meds?

@gypsywater

Suicidal despair. Every minute of the waking hours was pure torture. Antidepressants took this hell away.

Glad the ads helped. Did they get you back to your normal self?

@Vampy Within like 10 weeks. It blew my mind.

It felt like wading through mud.

[quote gypsywater]@Vampy Within like 10 weeks. It blew my mind.[/quote]
No way! Which ones did you try?

@GoneFishingAgain

It felt like wading through mud.

Do you mean finding it hard to get through each day etc?

Wishing that I could press a mystical button next to my bed that meant I didn't wake up in the morning. It was a grim time.

@Vampyhooch It was Paroxetine. Have had a similar experience with Citalopram. True clinical depression should respond very well to ADs.

[quote gypsywater]@Vampyhooch It was Paroxetine. Have had a similar experience with Citalopram. True clinical depression should respond very well to ADs.[/quote]
Is there any way of knowing if it’s definitely clinical depression?

@userxx

Wishing that I could press a mystical button next to my bed that meant I didn't wake up in the morning. It was a grim time.

:( that’s not good. What helped you through it?

I woke up everyday cried and sobbed, wrote my goodbye letters to my kids/DH, planned my funeral. I couldn’t wait to die but I was to much of a coward to actually do it. Then one day I decided to go to the doctors, I got ADs and life changed.

@Mixitupalot

I woke up everyday cried and sobbed, wrote my goodbye letters to my kids/DH, planned my funeral. I couldn’t wait to die but I was to much of a coward to actually do it. Then one day I decided to go to the doctors, I got ADs and life changed.

big hugs great that you went and seeked help and that it worked for you. Did you have any other symptoms?

I used to feel so hopeless. I’d go through the motions, but not see the point in anything. I felt suicidal, mostly to just want to stop the pain. I felt sick constantly and had horrible stomach pains. I would self harm to just feel something different. I knew I loved my friends and family and I forced myself to see them, even though I didn’t want to see them at all.

A few months back I was diagnosed with PTSD and dissociative disorder. I have been in therapy for six months - which has helped a lot. I don’t think I’m depressed anymore, just struggling with the symptoms of the PTSD. It’s a horrible place to be, but it doesn’t last forever - there is hope.

I’m just placemarking to come back to later. After I’ve had a think.

Like a sinister malevolent miasma inside. Bleak.
Just a swirling cloud inside me, no stability, nothing solid to hang onto. I used to say l felt like ghost, bits of me drifting off. Horrible haunting cold feeling.

Like a dementor

Waking up in the morning hoping it was really late (like hoping it was late in the afternoon) so the day was over quicker

Feeling like I was looking in on myself and it wasn't really me

Feeling 'nothing'

An awful time - if you're feeling like this, please speak to someone

@dillydallydollydaydream7

Waking up in the morning hoping it was really late (like hoping it was late in the afternoon) so the day was over quicker

Feeling like I was looking in on myself and it wasn't really me

Feeling 'nothing'

An awful time - if you're feeling like this, please speak to someone

What helped you get better? At the moment I feel awful. I’ve spoken to gps but still awaiting confirmation about whether I can try meds.

I’m dreading each day at present. Don’t feel like myself at all and feel exactly as you described. It’s awful.