Health anxiety

[Mvshrln]

Hi all,

I've seen a couple of health anxiety threads on here but they're all quite old/inactive and wondered if there were any more recent ones, or if anyone fancied discussing it via this new thread? It's helpful when someone else knows how you feel.

I really struggle with HA, the thoughts bounce around my head until I fixate on one and worry about it relentlessly. I can see why the anxiety has appeared (friends parent passed away, the covid-19 situation has terrified me, I'm getting older/have life events happening like buying a house, and I also work within the hospice sector). It's helpful to know why but it doesn't help with how to deal with it! I'm currently taking venlafaxine and CBT counselling via videocall but the worry takes up huge chunks of my day.

Nightmare! How is everyone else?

@KingaRoo you are so right to ban yourself from Google but I haven't been able to just yet :( I've banned myself from health forums (except for this one LOL) but I was trawling through really unhelpful forums which were loaded with emotional posts and content etc which obvs made things worse.

It's helpful that we know where our HA comes from but it's just what we do next that we need help with isn't it? Like how do we start dealing with it. I have found CBT really helpful for my very high level of anxiety but I'm just battling day to day now.

DH said he would give me a foot massage for every day that I didn't google anything health related. It worked! I love foot rubs!

@KingaRoo corrr how lovely!! Wonder if I can strike up that deal with my partner haha! Googling health stuff gets me in such a state whereas as soon as I see a doctor and they talk and explain things in a rational and sensible way, I feel so much better and calmer.

This thread is so helpful. My 18 month old wakes every 2 hours and has since day 1! I have constant brain fog but it's the worst it's ever been the last 2 weeks. I've just had my 4th bout of mastitis and my main health anxiety worry is sepsis, or infection spreading and not being there for my child :( it's a constant worry. Fast heart rate, fast breathing, confusion, dizziness, drowsiness etc are all symptoms of sepsis. But also they are all symptoms of anxiety and panic attacks!! So it's that constant "what if it isn't anxiety??". I just can't believe how crap it can make me feel, I feel like I'm not real or even here. Doesn't anyone else get that? Like all of your senses aren't working or are over sensitive and voices sound different etc. It's scary x

@charlaz welcome to the thread! Glad you have found it helpful :) Yes the "what if" questions are horrid aren't they! I imagine those symptoms can be part of tiredness as well and can cause that depersonalisation feeling of not feeling real etc. Poor you with mastitis as well :( I don't know a lot about it but is it worth you having a chat with your doctor about your fears surrounding sepsis/infection? They can provide very helpful and logical support and insight xx

Thank you @Mvshrln :) yes it will definitely be the tiredness as well. I have spoken to a sleep coach yesterday who seems pretty positive she can get him falling asleep on his own in the night within the next few weeks so fingers crossed!
I think I do need to speak to the doctor about those fears, I rang them 3 times within the space of a week at the start of this mastitis episode convinced I had sepsis so I don't want to be the girl who cried wolf as mentioned above. Nice to know I'm not alone though

@charlaz thats so good about the sleep therapist! fingers crossed :)
I think majority of us have called the doctors multiple times for lots of things, but I think it is good to consider discussing your anxious thoughts and anxieties with them.

Hope everyone is doing okay! It's Monday morning and I've logged in for work. I've felt quite anxious on Monday mornings recently, not too sure why so I'm trying to think of positive ways to help me with this.

Thank you so much for writing this thread. I am suffering really badly from health anxiety at the minute and it’s so reassuring (for a minute haha) to know there are other people feeling similarly x

I just started a new health anxiety thread but was kindly told about this one.

My anxiety started 5 years ago after the birth of my son, was able to manage it but the only thing I can't manage is on and off health anxiety. On a day to day basis I'm fine, it's just when I notice something out of the ordinary on my body I start to spiral. But it's also secondary health anxiety for my children and husband too. If anything is off with them I get the same anxious thoughts and feelings.

I don't want to spend my life feeling like this, but at the same time since it's not constant I don't know if I should be taking meds?

Like I said I can be fine for days and bam. This morning I noticed a small bump inside my mouth and that's set it off.

Hello! Saddling over to join too sadly.

My health anxiety began a few years back, with the death of a very close family member. Her cancer was misdiagnosed multiple times, and unfortunately, she ended up passing away. It hit me very hard, and i've never felt the same since. Now, I am spectacularly worried about my health, and it is life-consuming.

My main worry is skin cancer. I have some moles that look a bit atypical (but have always been there and never changed) yet despite visiting the GP over 6 times for the same ones (and being told they were fine), I can't shake the thought of melanoma away. It really just consumes my life. I can't even google moles anymore as the results have me running to the next room. My wonderful dp checks them for me every week or so and is adamant that they look exactly the same, but I still struggle to cope.

I'm the same as @pinkgin85 whereby I'll be fine for a few days, notice something a bit off (even a random bruise has me frantically googling blood cancers), and then totally spiral for days/weeks on end. I do try and not visit the GP as much, as I don't find it beneficial, and I feel a bit awful now about wasting their time will silly things.

It's really shit.

Hi everyone😊

Does anyone else find that when it’s too hot it makes your Health anxiety symptoms worse? The current heatwave has had me on the verge of anxiety attack constantly! 🥵

@Raggity19 welcome :) it's good to be able to bounce off one another when we are going through tricky times xx

@pinkgin85 I can totally relate to how you feel. I struggle with "everyday" aches and pains, and any new sensation in my body sets me right off into a pure panic. The only time I'm not worrying about my health is when I'm worrying about others! (family members etc).
Personally I found medication pulled me out of my pure panic (but I was so severe that I was staying in bed every day for 2 weeks, couldn't eat, was in an absolute state). I'm still on the medication though as I am still struggling daily.
Counselling is worth considering. I'm having CBT therapy which has been v helpful to challenge my thoughts or try to reframe them when they get really bad and out of control.

@DownThePlath I'm sorry to hear about your family member. My anxiety was partially triggered by a similar experience. It may sound odd, but did you grieve for them? A lot of my distress alleviated once I properly grieved for this person (loads of crying, sadness, just getting it all out of me).
I am the same with google, and the fear of cancer. Unfortunately every week I seem to focus on a new fear of something, I become obsessed with a particular illness which therefore exacerbates the bodily sensations and causes a high level of distress and I focus and spiral for a few weeks before moving on to something else.

it's very tricky, i know :( but starting this thread has been of some comfort to me as people are so kind and they understand.

I'm also doing CBT and taking medication (for me it was very much needed).

I have health anxiety too, mainly around being sick (emetophobia), stomach pains, chest pains, and linked to my uterus, my mum had cancer of the womb, and I'm menopausal but have had bleeding in the past. I rarely go to the doctor because of anxiety about catching germs and general anxiety, but I wish I could go more often. Even now with telephone consultations I can't because I really struggle with phone calls! I'm tired of my life and have more or less decided I don't care if I get ill. It doesn't stop me obsessing about it though!

Sorry to hear there are so many of us struggling with this.

@Ijustneed I used to have terrible emetophobia, it's horrid! I'm sorry to hear about your mum and that you are struggling. What do you do to make you feel a bit better? I sometimes make myself go for a walk. I don't always enjoy it but it's nice getting some fresh air and some sun on my skin.

I am struggling today (Monday blues!). I can't believe everything I've worried about in the past few months. I've worried about:
breast cancer: no symptoms but I had a lump in December which was checked and had disappeared. I had a meltdown and went to a&e (during a pandemic!) and then I paid for a private examination and ultrasound.
Bone cancer: my shin bone has been hurting (probably shin splints from where I've been walking tons and wearing flat shoes, plus then been walking funny to see if the pain got better or worse)
Blood cancer
Brain tumour: one sided migraine likely caused by hormones
Melanoma: I have lots of moles and a new mole. Again, paid for a private check.
Bowel cancer: I had some blood from an anal tear
Anal cancer
Vulva cancer: I've got a sore pus filled spot down there
Any gynae cancers: this is my current hook and I am very afraid of this. I have a sore lower back on right side and my bum

I can't stop googling and being hyper aware of bodily sensations. I hate reading the emotional stories online because they get to me and really upset me, but I'm like a moth to a flame with them and I lap them up and drive myself crazy. I need to stop googling.

@Mvshrln thanks. My mums fine now, but I'm terrified of hospitals (MRSA/ them making errors) so don't want to be in a position where I have to go. Also general anaesthetic and vomiting afterwards. I've had emetophobia most of my life, it's awful, in the past when the children were small it reduced me to a crying mess. These days I'm not confronted with it as much, but every single stomach issue triggers it.

The past few days, despite being menopausal I've had that feeling you get before you start your period and convinced myself it's cancer.

I'm so sad we're all dealing with this. Imagine what it must be like to not have all these anxieties. People don't know how lucky they are!

@Mvshrln
It took a while for the grief to hit properly as it was such a shock (from diagnosis to death in 4 months), but yes I do grieve for her a lot now. Mostly the injustice of it. Whilst I am aware that she still may not have survived if it was picked up sooner, you can't help but wonder. I feel like i'm just constantly second guessing doctors now, and wondering if it's me they're misdiagnosing now. Awful .

I could cry at finding this thread - I’ve always felt like a drama queen but reading that other people feel like this is so helpful - the tinnitus, the lying flat on the floor to check symptoms... my concern today is a tingly feeling in my left eyebrow, probably due to staring at a computer screen for hours of every day, but I’m convinced it’s more sinister. I’ve had health anxiety my whole life coupled with a terrible phobia of needles and medical procedures. Have lived a very healthy life so had never had to realise my fears until last year. Arm started to ache after going to the gym, few days later red, hot, couldn’t move it. Went to GP thinking I’d badly pulled a muscle, and ended up in the DVT clinic. I don’t meet the criteria for a blood clot (26, female, healthy BMI, not pregnant, no health conditions) so they wanted to run a few tests. Couldn’t get the blood test, fainted, came round to needle in my arm. I felt completely traumatised and now I do nothing but focus on every single ache and pain and worry about it. It’s interesting that everyone finds Covid has enhanced this. I don’t feel particularly worried about catching Covid, so maybe it’s being stuck in the house 24/7, but my HA has honestly never been worse.

I don’t feel particularly worried about catching Covid

I hope you don't mind me asking this - I've seen other posts from people with HA saying they're not worried about catching COVID. Please may I ask why? Let me just say that I'm sure you're right in not worrying - to the vast majority of people it isn't a problem. But I have HA and have frequently found myself imagine symptoms of COVID and I'm intrigued as to why this isn't a worry to some people with HA? Hope I don't make this a worry for you - like I say, I'm sure you're right not to worry about it!

I'm just surprised that for lots of people with HA, they're not finding this pandemic a problem that way? Maybe your views on this might help me?

Hope it's okay to ask.

@Ashmarie I'm glad you're here and able to find some comfort with us xx
I've fainted a few times at hospital/doctors as well - we get so overwhelmed!
It is really interesting to see how we've got been worried since covid, and I'm the same as you where I'm not really worried about covid (although in the beginning I was hysterical at the thought of my mum catching it).

The covid situation has definitely made some people's HA worse, or people who've not really experienced HA before now struggle with it. I think (for me) it's due to:

1. every single day we were being given death statistics. this is truly upsetting and frightening however it unfortunately seemed necessary to get people to pay attention and to behave in order to stop the spread
2. this daily reminder of death may have made us examine our own mortality, something which our society doesn't generally speak about openly so it's a scary and sad thing to think about when we haven't done so before
3. whether we are furloughed, don't work, work from home or continue working, our lives and routines have totally changed. I'm wfh now and have loads more time to think and body check. Also, I can browse google on my phone and laptop whereas I wouldn't be able to do that in an office as I'd be surrounded by colleagues

but of course, whilst it's helpful that we know why we feel this way, we then need to figure out how to move forward!

@Sojo88 I think for me, I'm not worried about catching it because so many people do seem to recover from it, even those who have had underlying health conditions. Plus the measures that were put into place (e.g the Nightingale hospital) were never really used, and equipment and PPE panic was not as dire as the media may have made it out to be (I'm aware this is a touchy subject and we have differing views on this).

@Ijustneed I'm so pleased to hear your mum is fine now! It's such a struggle when we aren't sure how to cope with body sensations. And I agree with you about other people being lucky they don't worry about all this! I see people with terrible sunburn and I think "omg aren't you worried about your skin??" or I see someone moan about something silly on facebook and i'm just sitting there with 50 internet pages open worrying about various illnesses.

But then, my level of worry is bad and not what I want.

@DownThePlath yes that's understandable. That was a similar situation with the person I knew and it was so sad. It's difficult when you can't trust doctors - at my first smear the nurse said "you'll be fine" then next thing I knew I was being treated for severely abnormal cells. But it's so important to learn to trust them - they are professionals and have extensive experience, training and knowledge. And we of course need to learn to trust ourselves :)

Sojo- I’m 99.9% sure I have already had Covid. My colleague came back from holiday mid December from areas that it was prevalent and within the week all five of us within the office were knocked by the standard Covid symptoms - temperature, cough, no sense of smell or taste. At the time I thought I had the most horrendous cold but now I think it was likely that and I was okay. I have also been so strict with taking precautions (maybe this does stem from HA) and at this point I wouldn’t know where I would have caught it from, I haven’t been near another person in months. Maybe although I don’t feel too worried about catching it, the anxiety has played a part in how careful I’ve been.

Mvshrln - I agree completely. I’ve worked from home throughout but would never sit in the office googling symptoms or lie down on the office floor to check for lumps and pains, whereas I do so 10+ times a day in the comfort of my own home.

@Ashmarie yep same here. And I've had more time/money (due to not paying for travel) so I've been going to more doctors and private appointments which is just feeding into my anxiety. Once I had the private breast scan done my family thought my anxiety would go and it did.. for 2 hours :(