self loathing and anxiety

[karateplumbear]

Just this really. I am full of them this week. Anyone else?

I’m struggling with anxiety. I feel trapped and can’t get a moments peace to decompress. Dh and kids are great but my ds is 9 and autistic and he has been full on even more so since lockdown started. He can be aggressive ie hitting throwing things swearing etc and when he’s acting out it’s triggering me so much. Usually I cope ok with his outbursts but I’m exhausted and feel drained so I’m struggling with this at the moment.

Yes to peace. I had a bit of a rant today and it helped. I kind of need different people to rant too though, it's so bad and not a great strategy, but feel lethargic, fat and sodded off, and my brain won't focus or stop worrying, then I start to think god what if this is permanent. I mean as in I am always like this even when we get out of lockdown. All just worrying pointlessly. I did a fun quiz tonight and the distraction helped, forgot laughing is a good remedy.