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Original poster

Please talk me down from the edge

61 replies

trudygarland · 01/09/2019 00:48

I have a daughter and a husband. I feel like I am the luckiest girl in the world and yet the most hopeless. Samaritans took too long to answer. Help

OP posts:
AmazingGrace16 · 01/09/2019 00:49

Hello,
I'm here listening

EveningLight · 01/09/2019 00:50

Tell us what’s going on. Please try them again. And also see a doctor ?
We are here too.

DramaAlpaca · 01/09/2019 00:51

Also here.

AmazingGrace16 · 01/09/2019 00:52

Try the Samaritans again. You've got all the time you need.

Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 00:55

Doctors are taking 4 weeks even after 3 years of ups and downs, medication isn't working and no one wants to listen. My Dh is becoming less understanding and I'm scared I'm going to lose both him and my daughter. My job is part time so I am lucky in that respect but I feel like I'm drowning and have no reason to feel that way. I can't breathe anymore, I'm suffocating and no one can see it

OP posts:
Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 00:56

Thanks for the replies x

OP posts:
AmazingGrace16 · 01/09/2019 00:57

Have you felt like this before?

Freddiefox · 01/09/2019 00:57

Hi, I’m listening.

Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 00:59

@AmazingGrace16 slightly but not as desperate as this...I feel stupid now but I don't know where to turn to anymore without hurting anyone

OP posts:
buttonz · 01/09/2019 00:59

I'm sorry - having a similar evening. You are not alone,

Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 01:01

I don't want to feel like this, has anyone got any positive stories please. How do I pull myself from the edge. No sleep and everyone else in bed is a recipe for disaster, I'm scared but I want the feelings I have to stop

OP posts:
Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 01:02

@buttonz I hope you're ok x

OP posts:
Gemz1806 · 01/09/2019 01:03

I'm listening. Are you able think of the good things in your life? Little things that take away some of the shade away. A song, a memory, a happy time you can share with your DD about when she is older?

DramaAlpaca · 01/09/2019 01:06

Could you call your surgery first thing on Monday & ask for an emergency appointment. Tell the GP what you've told us here about how you are feeling & your meds not working & ask to try something else. There's something out there that will help, sometimes you need to try a few until you find what works, I know I did.

steakandcakes · 01/09/2019 01:08

I have bipolar and recently started medicine,I know how you are feeling.

Things went from rock bottom to semi normal in a few days,so it does get better! It just takes the right people and help.

But you need to talk to somebody properly,get your meds changed asap,and do you have a mental health team you can call now? I know my ones are great...hoping yours are too.

X

bellainthemiddle · 01/09/2019 01:08

Try 111 or A and E - I'd suggest the second actually.

I think you need to be with someone who can help you, from a non-involved perspective.

Sending hugs, you can do this x

steakandcakes · 01/09/2019 01:09

Would it help to just talk about some random bullshit with us to take your mind off it,until your partner or somebody is awake?

AtrociousCircumstance · 01/09/2019 01:13

How long have you been on the medication? Long enough for it to settle? Or maybe you could try a different one?

Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 01:15

@DramaAlpaca I've called everyday this week about my meds and tried 4 different ones. Every day I have been put in a queue at 8.30 to be told to call the next day for a same day appointment. Our doctors surgery is overstretched but I can't seem to get through that I am desperate. 3 phone calls resulted in me getting the number for an external counselling system but even that waiting list is 3 months. There are
great days where I wonder what the hell is wrong but then there are days like this where I plummet and have no explanation. I don't want to do anything drastic because of my daughter and husband but I am at the point now where I can only imagine the ultimate release

OP posts:
MoreCuddlesForMummy · 01/09/2019 01:15

Keep calling Sams... I used to be on the phones. This is a very busy time of the week but they will listen and they are very well trained to try and help you 💐 I’m so sorry you feel like this x

AmazingGrace16 · 01/09/2019 01:18

I think that being with or talking to someone real would really help you tonight. A and E if you can get there safely. Samaritans, 111 even.

Teaandcrisps · 01/09/2019 01:20

Hey OP - I'm up with insomnia again if you fancy a chat. Was there a particular trigger tonight?

Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 01:21

Just reading my messages back makes me feel ashamed, it took a lot for me to admit to breeding help though. For 4 years I have tried to get the right medication only for it to feel useless after a few months. I'm tired of side effects and waiting for them to work though. I feel like every time I make a breakthrough, the plummet is worse and now I'm on the edge. Still on hold with the Samaritans right now but just talking and letting this out is helping so thank you Thanksx

OP posts:
Original poster
trudygarland · 01/09/2019 01:22

Needing not breeding Hmm

OP posts:
lovelilies · 01/09/2019 01:23

If you can go to A&E, you will be seen by the crisis team, would that be an option for you?