Just need some hope

[Mummyrj18]

Just want to know that you can come through a bad period of anxiety and depression, and that your thoughts aren’t your own when your in that state. Feel like everything’s falling apart and I can’t love my children but they’re the only thing keeping me going . So exhausted and confused just want to be myself again always loved being a mum now I just feel empty. Please tell me I can be that person again x

Five years ago I could have written your post but (fingers crossed) have been stable since so it IS possible to come out of it.

What help are you accessing? Is your GP aware?

I have been to my gp and local mental health centre which is helping but I just feel so anxious about not getting better 😞 hate the intrusive thoughts that I don’t love one child as much as the other which I know aren’t true but I can’t understand it 😞 don’t know anyone else that has felt like this feel alone xxx

Hi OP.

Two years ago I was in a similar place and I was convinced it wouldn't get any better.

But, with support (and possibly medication) it does.

It's not an overnight thing, it really is a journey. Do you have any family or friend support you can draw on?

You've take the right steps by talking to your GP and accessing mental health services. I felt so disconnected and lost, but they helped me work towards getting back on track.

Don't be afraid to reach out. Do you have numbers for the crisis team should you feel unsafe?

I have lots of support and crisis team helping. I’ve started sertraline a few weeks ago. Just can’t bare not feeling close to my daughter I don’t understand how I know I love her so much but have bad thoughts that I don’t even like her which makes me feel sick. I don’t have the same thoughts about my son. I’ve always loved being a mum even during hard times. Just can’t understand why I’m having these thoughts X thank u for replying x

I’ve found the loneliness the hardest part of my struggle with my mental health xx