To have been planning "The end" for so long

[Dontjudgethefudge]

I don't want to continue

I can't

I have so much debt I haven't dealt with
Haven't told anyone

I'm a coward, addicted and need to stop being such a burden

Fully aware this sounds like a typical suicidal post.
I don't mean it to. I won't do anything silly now.
I don't know how to cope anymore

Over ten years ago I was panicking about debt. I could not see a way out. I found a post on money saving expert which said basically said "there is no debt you can't get out of". Which i found hugely reassuring and helpe me. I can't find the same post but instead a new one (which basically says the same thing)

www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/

Hello Dontjudge, we are really sorry to hear you are feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources.
You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

Me too. I have everything I need to go through with it, just don't seem to have the guts to do it. I don't know whether I'm more of a burden alive or dead. I'm so sorry you feel like this too. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. You can pm me if you want to talk about it. I know the isolation is the worst part.

Could you contact Step Change about your debts? They are free, confidential and not at all judgemental. It’s hard to do when you’re massively depressed but they should be able to help you come up with a plan.