Petrified by mental health issues

[Firesidetreats1]

I’ve suffered mental health issue - anxiety and depression since I was about 16 I’m 27 now. I’ve recently just found out I was pregnant and wasn’t sure what to do after already having an abortion when I was 24. I’ve decided to keep the baby but I’m petrified of my mental health and scared I’m going to have a break down. I’m currently 6 weeks pregnant and this past week I’ve felt terrible - sick, anxious, tired and really low. I’m scared of my mental health. Has anyone experienced anything similar?

I have these fears too, although I'm not pregnant it has put me off trying. Are you on any medication? X

It’s perfectly understandable that you feel worried, OP, given your history. But as long as you make sure your GP, midwife and obstetrician are fully informed, you will be carefully monitored, and treated as necessary if you suffer a relapse.
For what it’s worth, I used to regularly anaesthetise women with severe postnatal depression for ECT treatment. Over the years, the numbers have dwindled to almost none, as modern antidepressants are so effective. By the time I retired, the patients were largely elderly people with long standing resistant depression- I certainly wasn’t getting any new mums being referred.
Do you have support, and access to treatments such as cognitive therapy to reduce your anxiety? If not, there are freely available resources online which you can use at home.
Congratulations on your pregnancy, and I hope you can look forward with excitement and happiness rather than anxiety. Do mobilise friends, family and your health care team to help you - you’re not alone with this. Good luck, and God bless.

You need to let your midwife and Gp know, they can organise support and treatment.

Having a baby is hard,there are many, many mothers who’ve experienced what you are going through, don’t feel alone.

We weren’t trying it just happened (failed birth control) I’ve been on anxiety medication in the past but depression my GP was recuculant to putting me on anything due to my age - I was in my early 20s and said to try diet changes and excerise. I find it comes and goes but I’ve had a very difficult year this year. I do yoga once a week and have tried private counselling at the start of this year but I didn’t feel like it was the right match for me. I just feel I need to speak to people who’ve been in a similar situation. I get scared to tell people in case they think I’m incapable and a nutter.

OP, if a friend or relative told you they were struggling with depression and anxiety, would you think “Ha, they’re an incapable nutter”?
Of course you wouldn’t! You’d be sympathetic and want to help in any way you could.
So will other people if you confide in them - your friends would be very strange friends if they would condemn or despise you for being ill.
Don’t be so hard on yourself! Accept that you simply have an illness, and you may need a bit of extra help around your pregnancy and post natal period. You’ll come through this, OP.