doing things that you know will upset you

[IamAporcupine]

I had to buy a ticket. I knew there was only one seat at that fare.
I didn't buy it. I made excuses in my mind and was going back and forth, unable to decide between that flight and another one.
I just kept waiting and waiting.

Now, of course, that fare is gone, and I am sitting here crying.

How the fuck is this even possible?

psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/02/03/do-you-have-difficulty-making-decisions/

Indecision is very normal when struggling mentally. I wouldn't be so harsh on yourself

I suspect that this is a case of you having negative self-beliefs and sub-consciously looking for ways to confirm those negative self-beliefs. Any chance you can access some CBT?

thanks chocolateworshipper that's exactly what it is.