please give me some advice on AD's

[scribbles1980]

Depressed now since November. Life really getting me down. I don't feel suicidal but just want to run away.
No enjoyment in life at all.
Back to the doctors on Monday. Thinking of asking for ads .
I'm frightened after reading that they can make you feel worse & side effects.
Please can anyone share your positive stories.
Thanks

How are you feeling today? Did you sleep any better?

Good morning mopants thanks for checking up on me.
Had a really good night's sleep. A bit difficult dropping off, but fine.
Just desperately hoping that these meds work. Maybe when I up the dose to 20mg?
My head does seem a little clearer and I don't appear to have major side effects.
Maybe a little more anxious.
I think I'm just desperate for these meds to work and so worried that they won't.

It'll be a bit more gradual than just waking up happy. But they will be having an effect. You will feel it more as you up the dose but also because you'll have been on them longer. Stay positive.

Forgot to ask how are you doing mopants?
Did you manage to go for a walk?
So wrapped up in myself and I know many of you are going through similar things.
Hope everyone is ok

Nope. I stayed in my pyjamas all day. Started to cook a roast dinner then realised I hadn't been shopping so only had a chicken some potatoes and tins of sweet corn. Not quite the wholesome meal I imagined but all the kids went to bed on time relatively easily so I got an early night as had been up since 5.30. Today they're running riot (we neeeeed the holidays to be over) but I have managed to switch on the washing machine and Hoover one room.
Oh, yesterday my big achievement was getting a hammer and two nails and hanging a net curtain that had been put on a wire then folded up on the windowsill 'to be done tomorrow' when we moved house two years ago. So you know, it's the little things!!

Well done mopants
Are you feeling better in yourself?
Our house is a bit like that and we moved in 8 years ago

I'm trying very hard to 'let it go'. It's not important. So what if I haven't vacuumed the stairs in a while. I am a bit more tired but that will pass. We can only see a third of the dining room table as the rest is covered with clean washing that is yet to be folded and moved upstairs but I will tackle that tomorrow morning while the kids watch a film with daddy. Nothing is insurmountable

And I even tied a pretty ribbon around the net curtain and hung it in an arty farty way so it puts a smile on my face every time I walk up the stairs

I take Prothiaden and have done for a year or so - I am lucky that I get a good effect from a very tiny dose.

OH ( a doctor) was on an SSRI at one time and, after the first few days, found great benefit from it. He found the only way to start it was to cut the tabs into quarters and then gradually build it up to full dose one week at a time. He had no problems gradually coming off it when the time was right.

I have a friend who has been on Citalopram for many years following a cancer diagnosis (she still has the tumour, but needs regular chemo). It has allowed her to have a normal life in the face of all these traumas.

DD has been on them for many years - Citalopram again - and it has been a lifesaver for her. She has tried to reduce the dose unsuccessfully, but this does not matter as she feels fine on them and there is no reason why she should not continue with them.

I am probably a bit older than you, but have successfully knocked my depression on the head by adding in HRT - a tiny dose.

The advice from others here that it is a bit grim to start with and then it does the trick is quite correct. When you are depressed you forget what it feels like to be positive and cheerful, but it is wonderful when it arrives!

I do hope that you will get some help and be feeling better soon.

mopants sounds a lot like our house at the moment.

Mishaps thank you for your positive stories. You're right I have forgotten what it feels like to be cheerful & positive.
If it wasn't for everyone on this thread I think I would not have taken the ad's.
Most of my family have got to the stage where they think I should pull myself together. If only it were that easy??

I also think there is such a bad judgement on people that take ads. When I have spoken to a few friends & family I have got the response that I shouldn't take them.

Only after hearing the stories on here & speaking to my gp that I realised there is nothing bad in taking them and that I shouldn't continue to suffer.
Thank you so much to everyone that has contributed this thread.

It is a shame that mental illness seems to have such a bad reputation. It really isn't anything to be ashamed of and should be treated the same as any other illness would be treated

How are you feeling today?

Hello sazerashez
Much the same really. Did go for a walk yesterday with the children & managed to stay up last night rather than retreat to bed at 9pm
The total tiredness seems to be lifting. But I don't feel 'happier'
Going out tonight for dinner at a friends and I really really don't want to go. DH is insisting.
Doesn't help that he is in a foul mood. Feels like I am being a bit punished for feeling low.
Maybe just me though.
Hopefully things will improve.
How are you doing?

I've just changed from fluoxetine to citaloptam. I used to hate the side effects of fluoxetine and so far I'm finding thes citaloptam much better. I've done a week at 10mg and just upped to 20mg. The first 2-3 days I felt tired, spaced out and had a headache and the same again now ive upped them. I've had no increase in anxiety which was the most awful affect of the fluoxetine.

Feeling hopeful.

I've also started CBT which I think will be useful.

Could your Dh go alone tonight? One of the things ive picked up from cbt already is that you have to look after yourself. Every time you force yourself to do something when feeling fragile, it is further damaging your mental health. Ok, we all need a little push in the right direction on occasions but Ive come to realise that sometimes we need to listen to ourselves.

I've suffered from depression on and off for 20 years. For the first time ever, I've asked my gp for a sick note for work while I get myself through the change in my medication.

Paddy well done for getting help. Hopefully things will start looking up for you.
Maybe I will feel better when I up my dose.
No chance of not going as the children really looking forward to it & I haven't done anything with them really this week.
Maybe I am expecting too much from the meds?

I think you probably are. I saw my gp on Thursday after almost a week on the new tablets and he said he certainly wouldn't have expected to see an improvement yet. In my experience its more like 3-6 weeks.

Keep going with them though. You will see a gradual improvement rather than suddenly waking up one day feeling great.

Hang in there x

Citalopram plus CBT saved my life - literally. I started on 20mg but saw the real difference when I went up to 40. I was on that for about a year, then spent another year coming off it. And I love life now.

I know it's easy to say but don't push yourself too hard. One of the most helpful things for me was recognising that I was ill & my feelings came from that.

Thanks, just feeling a bit sorry for myself again.
Can't bare the thought of feeling like this forever.

You'll get there. Just keep plodding on.
I don't think you'll suddenly 'wake up feeling happy' you'll just not feel so low / anxious. And be able to function more normally.
Hopefully you're nearly there.

One of the most helpful things for me was recognising that I was ill & my feelings came from that.

I couldn't agree more :).

You won't feel like this forever. That is the depression talking. Try to relax and take each day as it comes. Soon enough you'll look back at the day and realise you've had a 'good day'. You then might have some rubbish days followed by more good days. The good days will gradually increase though.

Yes. It all seemed fairly normal & inevitable at the time but looking back now I can see how wrong things were.

So, weekend was ok. Went to a friends and enjoyed it. Told them I was on antibiotics so couldn't drink.
I have been sleeping so much. Not during the day though but 9-10 hours at night.
No bad dreams.
Upped my dose today to 20mg. Not really feeling happier, but calmer maybe.
The only side effect seems to be my lose of appetite which is great
Hope you are all OK

Glad your weekend was good. Getting decent sleep always helps towards feeling better. You seem to have been really lucky with the side effects hopefully you will have a good week and keep noticing improvements. I realised on Saturday that I was actually laughing with two of my children and playing around with them and I can't remember the last time I just laughed. Was so nice

loss of appetite

mopants that's great! My DD came into my room last night with a huge knot in her hair. Normally I would have been snappy with her for waking me up. But I calmly brushed her hair until I got the knot out.
Sounds horrible doesn't it? But a week ago I don't think I would have done it. Or would have been really grumpy with her

I really hate myself when I am depressed. Yet it takes me ages to actually admit to it and then to get to the doctors for help. I let my son brush my hair yesterday (I hate having my hair messed with, don't even get it cut) and it was fine. I was listening to the eldest read on my kindle while he was doing it and it was lovely afterwards to think I'd managed to be a happy parent for a while. We are on the up. In a few weeks we won't recognise ourselves! I unfortunately do not have the loss of appetite but am breastfeeding so don't know how much is down to baby's growth spurt and teething issues.