please give me some advice on AD's

[scribbles1980]

Depressed now since November. Life really getting me down. I don't feel suicidal but just want to run away.
No enjoyment in life at all.
Back to the doctors on Monday. Thinking of asking for ads .
I'm frightened after reading that they can make you feel worse & side effects.
Please can anyone share your positive stories.
Thanks

[scribbles1980]

Yes, 2 weeks today.
Feeling much better, not fantastic but definitely better.
Thank you to everyone who has offered advice and support.
I don't think I would have taken the meds if it wasn't for the positive stories on this thread.
I really hope things continue to improve for everyone.

[Paddypaws3]

Glad to hear you're feeling a bit better.

My sleepiness is easing and I'm definitely having more good days than bad now :). I've been on them for almost 3 weeks now.

[sazerashez]

This is great! So glad to hear you are feeling better. Paddy: it was about the 3/4 week point that I got my energy back. How is the sleep?

[scribbles1980]

Oh dear, I've got bloody flu.
Throat is killing me & my chest really hurts.
Just as I thought things were getting better.
Hopefully, this will clear up soon & I will get a bit more energy.
sazerashez it sounds like you are doing great. I want to be where you are!
Maybe a few more weeks

[scribbles1980]

So I had my review today. Told the gp I did feel better so he has given my 4 more weeks at 20mg.
I said I was feeling lethargic during the day and he suggested taking the meds at night.
Not sure if I should just ride it out or switch to taking them in the evening.
Has anyone else had experience of this?

[stressjug]

It is always a case of finding the right one. the only bad experience i have had was when I was a teen on prozac. Made my depression a million times worse.
I was on Citalopram before I had DS but when I stopped during pg then had terrible pnd and a return of my insomnia and the citalopram didnt really touch it. After DD was born I went onto Mirtazapines straight away.
I started at a high dose 45mg and now 6 years later i am down to 15mg twice a day and honestly have never felt better. I cannot remember the last time I felt black or had trouble sleeping.
personally I have never been troubled with side affects or zombification with the exception of prozac, but I don't think you will be a long term depressive (its in my family and I was 8 when I started exhibiting symptoms, medicated from 12).
You are going through a rough patch and could well be a short course of something will see you right as rain.
Well done for talking about it, maybe write down how you have been feeling for when you go to the gp. I know whenever I was teary, I would get there, start talking and the floodgates would open.
Good luck and so sorry for the essay writing therapy

[Paddypaws3]

I spoke to my dr about this yesterday. I explained about the daytime sleepiness and nighttime insomnia and he was quite certain that the best time to take the medication was the morning. My sleep issues are better than last week (after I trialled taking it at night). Not sure if it's related, that's just my experience.

I'm just getting over an awful throat infection and cough too! Bloody typical, on top of everything else. Hope you feel better soon.

[scribbles1980]

Thank you stressjug & please don't apologise, it is helpful to hear other people's stories. How sad that you have been suffering from such a young age. I am glad you are feeling better.
Hi paddy I think I will continue taking them in the morning because I am sleeping well in the evening.
The daytime thing is more feeling lethargic than actually wanting to sleep. Hopefully this will wear off.
Obviously having this throat infection doesn't help but I definitely think I am doing the right thing taking the meds.
Bloody awful isn't it? Hope you feel better soon too.

[sazerashez]

The day time zombie ness lasted about 4 weeks with me. Lots of energy now except I still find waking up in the morning really difficult and am groggy for ages which as a previous insomniac is a whole new world for me.

[GooodMythicalMorning]

citalopram does help (except today as Ive forgotten two in a row so feel like shit) been on it for about 9 months now and my life has been greatly improved. Im on 40mg. I also had agoraphobia so couldnt leave the house before but go anywhere I want now. cbt is worth doing too. found it quite helpful but no means cured it.

I forgot you arent supposed to drink on it and have had a few nights drinking recently and its not been a problem for me not that im recommending you do so.

[scribbles1980]

Just checking in to see how everyone is doing?

My throat infection is clearing but I still feel very lethargic. We are trying to do some decorating and I have no interest at all. Just can't be bothered.

When I saw the gp he gave me another 4 weeks at 20mg. He said if I don't feel any better then he can up it to 40mg, which is the maximum dose.
Not sure I want to do that. But maybe I haven't given it enough time?
I am definitely less teary but still don't really feel happy.

[2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead]

IME you won't feel happy, just not sad. After a while I found that I started to feel happy when the DC do cute things and stuff, a kind of 'full of love' feeling that I'd not been getting.
I see the ADs as more to help me function, so I can make other changes to help me 'feel happy'.
Sorry if that's not what you want to hear, and you may have a totally different experience.
So glad you're feeling better, though. You sound really together now and so on sure you'll be able to take charge of you life again. But give yourself a break and let yourself have some times that you can't be bothered and rest!

[scribbles1980]

Thank you 2little
Yes, you are right. I know that they cannot make me happy & I have to put things in place to do that.
Just feeling a little frustrated.
It hasn't been 3 weeks yet, so it will take a bit more time I guess.
I am definitely in a better place than I was when I started thus thread.
Everyone's advice and support has been so helpful. Thanks x

[scribbles1980]

this thread don't know what the he'll is going on with my typing lately

[scribbles1980]

Going into week 3 now.

Not sure if it's because I have been ill or that my period is due but today I feel crap.
Really really low & tearful again.

I thought I was turning a corner but the sadness today is overwhelming.
I still feel very zombie like during the day & feeling like I can't be bothered.
Struggling to get up in the morning too.
Hopefully this is just because ive not been (physically) well.

I am so frightened that these meds won't work. I definitely don't want to take a higher dose.
How is everyone else doing?

[2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead]

When do you go back to the dr? Don't worry if s/he suggests a higher dose, or different meds. You just have to find the right thing for you.
But this is one day. It could just be a blip. It seems your proportion of good to bad days has shifted massively. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.

[sazerashez]

Hi

Don't forget that you have had times when you felt things were turning around. It's still early days. There will be moments when you still feel sad. I had a massive one yesterday. They don't make you immune to blips unfortunately! But on the whole they really do work. Just give it a bit more time and remember that they made you feel better last week and will do again.

[GooodMythicalMorning]

3 weeks still isn't long. It took about 6 weeks for them to kick in for me.

[scribbles1980]

Thanks all

I spoke to my DH and H3 said he could see a definite change in me. So maybe they are having an effect.
It's just this bloody can't be bothered feeling. The doctor said that could be the depression so give it more time
He did suggest taking them at night but as I am sleeping well I'm a bit worried about doing that.
Thanks again I am very grateful to you all x

[GooodMythicalMorning]

Yes. Dhabi noticed a change before I saw it myself so that's a good sign.

[GooodMythicalMorning]

Dh not Dhabi

[sazerashez]

How are you getting on?

[Paddypaws3]

I just came to check in with you too :). Hoping things are slowly improving.

I'm feeling ok. Definitely better than I was but not fantastic. I guess I just feel a bit "flat" if that makes sense? I certainly feel calmer and my patience has increased with the children but...

I'm seeing my gp on Thursday so will ask if he thinks I need my dose increasing. I'm 4.5 weeks.

[scribbles1980]

Hi paddy & sazerashez thanks for checking up on me!

A bit like you paddy feeling a bit flat. My period is due, I'm late (defenitley not pg). I'm never late, would the meds effect this?
Normally I'm a shouting, highly strung mess but I do feel calmer but tearful.

Going into my 4th week now. I did read somewhere that they can take up to 6 weeks to work?
Still have that can't be bothered feeling so I'm frightened to up the dose as I think I would be zombie like.
I'm going to give it a few more weeks. I haven't had a drink either. Normally when I don't drink I feel so much better. But I do think the pmt doesn't help.
Keep praying they will eventually kick in.

[Paddypaws3]

Pmt definitely doesn't help. The Dr put me on cerazette last year which has been an absolute godsend and worked wonders for my dreadful pmt. I don't bleed either which is an added bonus .

If you're still tearful, it doesn't sound as though you're quite there yet. 6 weeks is a totally normal length of time to fully feels the effects so there's time yet. I'm barely crying now.

Don't dismiss the idea of increasing your dose if need be. I doubt you'll become a zombie. I find that I become very desensitised (if that's the right word ) and just don't cry at very normal things (things that people would normally cry about). If it comes to that, you can always reduce again if you don't like how it makes you feel.