I did an online test for depression, what next?

[PippaFawcett]

I have had a difficult year, NC with family, don't like my job as it is a lot of lone working and a long commute, DS is now 3 but has slept terribly since birth so I have been in a haze of exhaustion for three years - he is actually getting better but my tiredness hasn't lifted. I have had my thyroid tested but nothing came back and I am comfort eating all the time so my weight has rocketed.

Anyway, I did an online depression test and it said 'highly likely' or similar. What do I do next? Book a GP appointment? What happens there? I don't feel what I would describe as depressed but I do feel like my week is a long slog to be endured and 'got through' rather than enjoyed.

Experiences and advice welcome!

I obviously thought that all the stuff I outline was why I was feeling crap but I'm now wondering if it is something more serious.

How old are you Pippa ? Yes, first stop GPS and take it from there :)

I am 32. Does it make a difference? I've got a mirena coil too so I have wondered about taking that out as well, I had that put in just after DS was born.

Sounds like you could be suffering from exhaustion - 3 years is a long time to be sleep deprived. Are you a single parent? As you say it's been a difficult year. Most GPs have their own questionnaire to decided whether you are mildly/moderately/severely depressed. They ask about sleep, eating, feeling sad/tearful, lack of interest/motivation, that sort of thing. Why do you think your symptoms are something serious, not that depression isn't serious of course.

Not a single parent, DH and I both work ft in very full on (but not highly paid unfortunately!) jobs, I also have a stressful 1hour+ commute each day. DH is great and we split the workload but he has been ill this year as well so I am conscious not to overload him with extra 'stuff'.

I thought it might be more than exhaustion because everything seems so insurmountable now. Eg, if the remote control needs new batteries that is just another thing I need to remember to do etc. There is no joy in anything, it is all just to be endured. Nothing feels proportionate to the problem.

Hello,

Sorry to hear things are tough. It sounds like something pushed you to seek out an online test so i definitely agree it's worth following with your GP even if it's just to rule it out (online tests aren't always reliable). Your GP will likely ask about your mood changes in a more general sense and pending on where you are, they may have good links to services so they could ask you to fill in a questionnaire. Above all, (I'm hoping) your GP will just be helpful and give you some space to talk. If it is depression. If. There are various options that your GP could talk through with you. Whatever happens it's important to give yourself time to think about what suits you best. It can sometimes be hard to talk to someone about what you're feeling but there is no shame in it and GPs are there to help.
Good luck.

I only asked in case you were perimenopausal or something.

Please do go to your gp x

Thank you for your responses, it is helpful to know what the next step should be. I have booked an appointment and I will see what she says.

Depression isn't feeling sad. It's much more than that. Don't discount it. Good luck with the GP.

Thanks Wolfie. I don't feel sad as such but I feel very, very weary. I can make myself get up and going in the morning but it is hard. I always had the perception that depression was curtains drawn, couldn't get out of bed all day but obviously it is more than that.

I can't add anything much from what has been said as your GP is your first port of call. Good luck

You're stressed, long-term stressed. The symptoms for depression and stress can be over-lapping.

I had similar symptoms, and on my GPs suggestion I started St John's Wort 3 month ago. I can now see my problems clearer, and I have hired a cleaner! I am still on the St John's Wort and I have also started a yoga class. I have a lot on with my full-time job, my DH is registered blind and we have 2 kids. I think having a cleaner has become a a necessary expense for my sanity.

I could be stressed. Or I need to make better choices: exercise, sleep, food etc but I can't summon the energy. We do now send our ironing out to be done and that definitely helps. We had a cleaner for a year but she was pretty poor and expensive so we stopped as our finances are stretched as it is.

I think you are stressed. It's hard to make good choices if you are stressed. What the St John's Wort did for, it might also do for you - it just takes the edge off.

Go to your GP and hear what your options are.

What is the difference between being depressed and being stressed then?

Why don't you have a look on the MIND website and read about depression. When it's severe it can be an absolute torment - I have been suffering for 6 years and I can assure you it is horrendous. It sucks the life out of you, takes away your interest/motivation in anything. Stress is feeling tired and a bit run down and overwhelmed. But having said that they will be experienced differently by individuals.

Thanks Nana, I will have a look at MIND. Sorry you are having a difficult time with it

Does anyone have a link to the test? I'd like to do it.

I just googled it, it might have been on the NHS choices site - I remember it being quite 'official' looking.

The difference between being stressed and depressed is that being depressed is worse ;) When I saw my GP she checked things like was I able to function/concentrate, did I have thoughts of wanting to die, could I get out of bed in the morning. From my answers she did not think I was depressed.

Sleep deprivation can give depression symptoms (my kids are older now and do sleep, but if I don't sleep for any other reason, I can become quire depressed, I don't handle it well). I expect the "haze" you describe has become permanent for you. That's another reason a mild AD like St John's Wort might work for you.

The GP has recommended CBT so I have completed a self-referral form online. She didn't recommend St John's Wort and wants me to go back in a month whether I have had some CBT by then or not.

That sounds great! Do you know how long the current waiting time is?

My GP referred me to a local counselling center after I had been on St John's Wort for 3 months. I have just been to the initial assessment and I am now waiting for them to call me back with an appointment for my first session. It's not on the NHS, my GP said that our local CBT would take ages, and that I needed to see someone now. So

TBH I am not sure if the counselling will help me, as my symptoms come when I have PMS and I think I am peri menopausal. But I am just not ready for prescription strength AD or HR, so the St John's Wort + counselling is my best bet. Besides I believe in finding and treating the root cause if possible.

Good luck!

Thanks misscph1073. The GP had no idea how long the wait would be which was definitely my main concern too. She wants to see me again soon so if I guess we can reevaluate the situation then if I haven't had any contact from the CBT team. I hope you feel better soon, I figured it can't hurt as she said any medication would take 4-6 weeks to have effect and I would need to be on them for at least 6 months so I figured I would try that first.

I'm already much better already, thank you. I think admitting to myself that I was having problems managing stress was a huge part of it, and then taking steps toward improving my situation, ie. talking (well, at the time I was still super stressed, so it was more a case of starting a big row about how over burdened I am, unfortunately) to my DH about it, seeing the GP, hiring a cleaner etc. And of course taking the St John's Wort for 3 months.

How are you feeling now that you have contacted CBT? Are there other things you could do that could make a difference? You probably already do this, but when my kids were little and I was sleep deprived, I went to bed silly early, like 8PM, then it wasn't so bad being woken up several time sin the night, and these days I still go to bed silly really early if I need to. I really prioritise my sleep, and it makes such a difference.

I need to do that more. We made it to bed by 10pm last night which is v early for us but DS was poorly so ended up with us all night. I feel better for talking to DH about how I feel and acknowledging that I am not coping. I just long to take a couple of months off to chill! I wish that was possible. I even joked that I should fake a pregnancy so I could get a year off! Part of me believes that modern life is just too much for many of us; long hours, no family, long commutes, expensive childcare, lack of housing etc that it is no wonder that so many of us are struggling. I hope I hear back about the CBT sooner rather than later but we will see. I am glad you feel better, I am going to keep looking for small things I feel I can manage that will help.