SPRINGTIME in the VILLAGE (Support for all Mental Health Issues)

[NanaNina]

Thought I'd start a new thread what with it being the Spring Equinox and all that..........and there's another reason. I'm hoping to re-connect with people who used to be frequent village visitors, but like me, seem to have fallen by the wayside. Of course everyone is welcome in the Village, so I hope more recent visitors understand my post and will not feel de-valued in any way. The stigma of mental illness is alive and well I reckon so we all need all the support we can get.

SO - CALLING

Vicar (she started the Village thread some years ago and occasionally pops in) Edwinia'sRevenge SnowyMouse (where ARE you?) SilveryPussyCat CIQ (I know you were having a tough time) Lem (once a very regular visitor) Hoochymama Pyrrghena collardove Victrix Pulled Creamhearts (previously FDG) MentalPsychiatrist KeemaNaanAndCurryOn (miss you and your wit)
FaithLoveandGrace MySpideySenseTickles

Would love to hear how you're all doing. I'm much the same, up and down, mostly down this month.

I've probably forgotten lots of people, but that's all I can bring to mind just now.

Is there anyone that you can phone, any one else at home who can reduce the risk got you?

For you

Morning, how is everyone.
Carbonel - I hope you are safe and got home ok.

Loveis - ignore your 'friend' who is telling you to try harder & be kind to yourself. Your DD is going to be so excited to see you. Please believe you are doing the best you can right now.

I have a headache. pfft. wish I could go back to sleep, but have loads of money stuff to sort out with STBXH.

Morning all.

Loveis your friend is extremely unkind and misinformed to say that to you. You're clearly a great mum whose DD means the world to her. I hope you're feeling a bit better today

I'm feeling down again today after being slightly better yesterday. My ongoing weight issues are making things ten times worse... I'm trying very hard to healthily lose weight but when the scales aren't budging its so so triggering, stimulates all of my self loathing that then expands to other areas and makes me want to just not eat full stop. Then I feel bad because DS is EBF (though he's started weaning now) so he's relying on me for his food and I don't want to affect his milk supply. My head is a mess at the moment.

Lurking under a stone in the corner of the Village pond.

I've been lurking but feel I need some support, can I join you ladies. Currently on medication, started having anxiety/panic attacks towards Christmas and it caused a mild bout of depression. Been on them for 3 months now and I have felt like me again. However, had a really bad day yesterday, another attack early this morning and I feel rotten. I'm seeing my doctor next week to review my meds so going to ride this out and hope this is a blip. Just feel like I'm going backwards and I can't stop crying. I'm struggling to be strong enough to support myself, let alone my family. We're going through a rough time and I'm quite scared how we're going to get through it.

Hi everyone.
Northumberland friend has now decided she wants me to tell her one positive thing that has happened each day ! I don't really know how to respond to that in honesty.

Carbonel Hope you got home safe. How are you feeling now?

Squiggle understand the stuff with the weight and confidence- have you tried slimming world or anything like that? (has been reccomended to me).

((Pyrr))

Hello Gemdrop I've been told that sometimes meds 'level out' after a while - is it possible yours have done that at all? I'm not sure how it all works, but I think it's good that you have a review.

Really struggling today, no motitvation, very upset, a really bad day.

Loveis I can't get to any groups as I live in a village, don't drive and need to be home in the evenings to get and keep DS asleep... Calorie counting and doing exercise DVDs at home but its trying to keep it sane that I struggle with as historically I've only ever managed to lose weight through disordered eating which I don't want to revisit. Hopefully I can keep the balance with support, DH is lovely thankfully.

I think I was on one of the previous threads but can't remember. I guess a lot of my current depression is circumstantial but I've had it on and off my whole life. I was on sertraline which worked well but had to stop due to side effects, am on mirtazapine which did nothing and am now about to start fluoxetine. I'm failing my course right at the end so will probably be discontinued. I've lost my partner and best friend - I wish I could be one of these people who moves on easily but sadly I'm not. Just feel like I've fucked up my life and got no idea what to do.

Yes I'm thinking it may be the meds, don't feel comfortable going on an even higher dose though as they make me feel woozy as it is. I'm hoping the doctor can talk through some other options but we will see. Sorry to hear you're having a bad day too. Thanks

Hello to everyone - glad that the new thread has brought new people - that usually happens but the problem I have is that I can't remember everyone's back story and I don't like posting unless I can reach out to others. That's one of the reasons I was calling "old timers" because I know their back story. I'm struggling at the moment with a lot of bad days, though thankfully I often lift as the day wears on and am usually better in the evening.

Anyway hello snowy nice to see you - hope the big D subsides soon. Are you still doing your maths course, though the combination of maths and depression is my idea of a nightmare!

Keema for some reason my PMs won't send. Will try again.

Pyrrhagena your post made me smile - could you maybe push the stone away a little and breathe a bit .....

Squiggle I agree with others, that you need a referral to a consultant psychiatrist. GPs can only usually diagnose depression/anxiety. I think you should ask your GP for a referral and don't take No for an answer. And please don't worry about social services - I'm a retired soc worker and can absolutely assure you that there is nothing to worry about at all. Time was when social workers were able to offer support to mothers in your position but they are so under resourced now, they are struggling to cope with their statutory responsibilities e.g. children being abused/severely neglected by their parents. It saddens me how so many mothers I've seen on here have this fear about mental health issues and social workers.

Gem I think to be honest that fluctuations in depression are to some extent "the nature of the beast" and are very common. It probably isn't anything to do with the meds and a raised dose might not make any difference. The medics refer to them as "blips" but I know how upsetting it is when you think you're better, only to drop down again, it's like taking 2 steps forward and 3 steps back. Chances are you will soon feel ok again. Was there any trigger for this recent blip? Sometimes there is but with me there are no triggers, the bad days just come and thankfully go again. BUT I'm old so don't compare yourself with me!

Like your new name hellina and glad you're well.

Are you still in hospital creamhearts

Hmm........hi to everyone else. Incidentally do any of you get fed up when people comment that "this lovely sunshine will make you feel better" - er no it doesn't actually - if it did I'd be tempted to sell up and re-locate to a sunny climate!

Yes I do. Or "cheer up, dont let things get to you." If only it was that easy.

Bad day here. Major jelly legs going on. Mil and sfil are doing the school pick up as can barely walk. Cbt tomorrow, I hope its useful to me. Im probably expecting too much.

(Mythical)

I get fed up with things like that Nana. Friends of mine are being really very trying (I attempted suicide last week) and telling me to be postive and fight it etc etc. But brain chemistry is weird, and my own battle has been going on for a very long time. I think sometimes the fight is in staying alive every day, never mind the rest. I try and try and try and still...still depressed.

I like how you refer to 'blips' - on bad days, it's so easy to think the depression is returning for good and you'll never be free, isn't it? I had a period of improving, one or two months of doing OK, then suddenly I wasn't anymore. The trigger was my ex-partner (and DD's Dad) birthday as he died 6 months ago, really tragically, in a house fire.

Sorry, going on about myself, am really sruggling and still waiting for any sort of therapy...just anyone to talk to at all. I'm so alone with it all.

(( to all struggling today ))

Seeing DD later, though I'll have to get a taxi as I'm not even motivated enough to get the bus.

Thank you, I suppose I have spent the last 4 or so weeks feeling quite good so I hope it is just a blip. And yes, there seems to be one trigger after another!! The reason this all started was due to the stress caused after my mum died last year, she was 49, woke up with chest pains and died getting out the ambulance at the hospital. After I started medication, and felt better, mil was taken to hospital, she has terminal cancer and has been given a few months. She's currently having chemo but is quite ill at the moment. We've taken in her young dog who's like a massive puppy. We already have a dog, it's been hard to adjust. So this is probably a blip due to all this stress but I'm just overwhelmed by it all and feel there's nothing I can do to change the situation. I feel very low at the moment. I'm sorry to everyone else whose having a bad time, if anything I hope it helps to talk on here. I need somewhere to vent as I feel I can't talk to Dh at the moment, he seems a bit distant but given the circumstances I understand why.

That's the thing I often find difficult, gem - when its triggered by those kind of stresses how on earth are you supposed to avoid them? And other people seem to just cope. I often feel better in times of low stress and think things are on the up only to be brought back down with a bump at the next turn...

Got my first cbt at 12. Really nervous. nervous about getting there, nervous about what it will be like. Shaking and feeling sick already.

Back. Tis only 5 mins by car. Was going in for low level cbt but by the end of my session she said she was going to switch me to the high intensity team as my anxiety is affecting every aspect of my life. So its 12 sessions instead of 4/6 and 40/50 mins instead of half an hour each session. She was a nice lady though. Hope the new one will be as nice.

Ah Goood - that sounds like it has been positive. Do you feel ok now?
My first appointment is on 13 April

I feel a little calmer. Im happier even though she didn't do much as its nice to know she is getting me the right type of help. She did seem perplexed at how high my anxiety was, probably as I was shaking just entering the room. Talking to her was helpful though, made me feel reassurred im not losing my mind.

It's a step in the right direction Goood, be proud of yourself

Thanks North. Im glad I didnt cancel. (Nearly did as dd has come down with chicken pox)

No nn if I move I'll get squashed.

Hope everyone is doing ok today. Speedy recovery for your DD goood. I dread mine getting it!

Thanks. She's fairly happy, just spotty

Well done good, hope your dd is ok as can be.

I've got lots of anxiety and depressive thoughts today. Really anxious about who is picking dd up from school, though in reality I know my friend who had her all week is doing it. Saw dd yesterday, she is coming home to me on Saturday. Feel very, very scared at how I will cope. Could cry right now really. Bad day. Home treatment came round and asked me to rate my mood from 1-10. I said a 2 as I was struggling to even get dressed. Really, really struggling. Suicidal thoughts. Could just do with some one to talk to really. Can't seem to pull myself out of it.

Hope you are OK, Pyrr

Can I ask for support here on this thread? Is that ok? I don't want to be a burden to people.