SPRINGTIME in the VILLAGE (Support for all Mental Health Issues)

[NanaNina]

Thought I'd start a new thread what with it being the Spring Equinox and all that..........and there's another reason. I'm hoping to re-connect with people who used to be frequent village visitors, but like me, seem to have fallen by the wayside. Of course everyone is welcome in the Village, so I hope more recent visitors understand my post and will not feel de-valued in any way. The stigma of mental illness is alive and well I reckon so we all need all the support we can get.

SO - CALLING

Vicar (she started the Village thread some years ago and occasionally pops in) Edwinia'sRevenge SnowyMouse (where ARE you?) SilveryPussyCat CIQ (I know you were having a tough time) Lem (once a very regular visitor) Hoochymama Pyrrghena collardove Victrix Pulled Creamhearts (previously FDG) MentalPsychiatrist KeemaNaanAndCurryOn (miss you and your wit)
FaithLoveandGrace MySpideySenseTickles

Would love to hear how you're all doing. I'm much the same, up and down, mostly down this month.

I've probably forgotten lots of people, but that's all I can bring to mind just now.

north I think communication is overstating it. My gp is livid with them about it as was other consultants who are now not involved. The psych said 'in MY opinion becca is find and MY opinion is what counts in MY department'

I won't repeat the opinion of my other consultants of the mental health team sums it up!

There's a lot going on and I, frankly, want to run away from everything.

Find = fine
,

I'm glad you had a good weekend North!

Hello all. Haven't posted here before but I started a thread in MH earlier. I have a diagnosis of cyclothymia from my old GP that I don't know whether or not is a correct diagnosis. I strongly suspect that I am coming down into a depressed period now after 6 months stable and a year hypomanic.

I'm trying to retrace my mood-steps, as it were. I was very depressed for two years, increasingly so, then flipped into hypomania - sympotoms of which for me are promiscuity, drinking, smoking and impulsive, obsessive behaviour. Met DH and fell in love. Towards the end of the hypomanic period decided to try for a baby. I believe I stabilised as normal half way through my pregnancy with DS just after DH and I got married and have been there (fortunately extremely happy with my decisions!) ever since. But now feel as though I'm heading down again. Its only when I'm down that I can spot hypomania in a past period of time.

The only meds I've ever had were citalopram but they made me more depressed. Tried upping the dosage, same effect, so I stopped taking them. I just want my moods to be stable. I don't mind and don't seek treatment when hypomanic as for obvious reasons I think I'm fine then! But scared to go my new GP to ask about further/new treatment options as I have DS now. He is absolutely my world and the best decision I've ever made! So not sure where to go from here but I need to sort myself out. My mood periods last a long time, with "mini-swings" throughout regardless, but more of them during depressed periods. I'm scared about any future hypomanic episodes and I don't want to mess up what I now have with my little family.

Hello everyone! :)

Sounds like an awful situation Becca and very frustrating. I am sure someone with more experience may be able to offer advice.

Here if you want to chat though.

Hi squiggle - have you ever been assessed properly by a psychiatrist or just your GP? If you're unsure of your diagnosis then a proper assessment may both help you to confirm what the issues are, but also make sure you're on appropriate medication.

At the very least a meds review is needed. Not all ADs work the same for all people, so if citalopram makes you more depressed, then maybe trying sertraline or fluoxetine might help.

Just my GP. I'd love to be assessed by an actual psychiatrist to get some answers but they just always want me to do counselling or CBT. Neither of which help because I know all of my triggers etc and can analyse myself til the cows come home. They seem mainly focused on insight, thinking that if you understand your mind you can control it better. I understand perfectly but that doesn't stop the feelings. I can sit there and say "I feel x way because of y" and the counsellor pats me on the head and says well done. But that doesn't help me stop myself from feeling x.

Having DS I do worry what will happen if I go and ask for further referrals. I know he's fine and I'm a good mum, which I'm sure my HV would confirm, but it worries me nonetheless. I'm going about getting access to my health records. I figure that if I know what they already say then that will give me a better starting point.

Also said GP's diagnosis was partly based on the fact that I'm a writer and artist. Apparently I have a "creative mind"

Thankyou north

squiggle I was told my mind was creative as I was in a scientific role and suppressed it so much

Sometimes I think speaking to these people makes things more complicated

Stressed today just trying to get a sick note from the doctor's. They've done it but was much more complicated than it needed be.

I'm still around, just coming out of some depression. I hope everyone's doing ok?

squiggle, if it's social services you are worried about, they don't do much. I'm on day 4 post - suicide attempt and no-one's offered to help with dd or made a refferal or anything. They just check dcs are fed and clothed and that's it basically. If you need help, don't let that fear be the thing that stops you.

I'm really very tired and have a banging headache.DD is still with friends. She will be back at the weekend now because of their work commitments etc, but mainly to give me time to recover properly before jumping back in. Home treatment were helpful today, but made me feel selfish and full of regret for what I did. Will see them again on Friday, with a Dr.

Feeling very low and alone.

Hi everyone.

Hope things are starting to feel brighter for you snowy

Are HTT helping love?

squiggle I def think it is worth being referred into secondary MH services - they can give you more specialised care

Hi Cream, how are things going with you?
Htt are being kind of ok, they aren't coming out until Friday now. My dd is still with friends, but I'm missing her and really wanting her back. She's coming back at the weekend. My friends wanted to give me some time to recover from things.

I missed your post, snowy, hope you start to recover soon.

Managed school run with dh this morning but then had to turn back half way when doing the pick up and leave mil to get them on her own. Bit embarrassing.

(Mythical). That's really good that you did one though. Congratulate yourself on that. It must have been hard.

I am feeling really tearful, missing DD. Am seeing her tommorow and then she's back at the weekend.

Had a chat with a friend earlier, she says I have to try harder. I'm trying as hard as I can . Now I feel really guilty for letting dd down and ashamed of my actions before. I feel like a really bad Mum, sending her to stay with friends. Like I've totally and utterly failed her. Not in a good place.

How's everyone else doing? The village is very quiet...

Loveis, please please be kind to yourself & believe that this is the best thing for your DD right now, you miss her - you really aren't a bad mum and you aren't failing her. You are seeking help & you want to get better, that's not failing that's wanting to achieve.

Sorry - dashing off, but didn't want to see you unanswered x

good evening, just been reading your postings and sorry you are suffering.

Thanks Northumberland. Am feeling really, really stressed tonight about even seeing dd again. Anxiety is through the roof and very tearful. Starting to think she will hate me for leaving her with friends, worrying about her and being scared of taking her back, all at once.

I think you will feel better once you have seen DD. How much does she understand what you are going through?
I understand why you are feeling anxious. Have you tried some meditation / mindfulness? I find it sometimes helps me.

I'm at rehearsal tonight, but will check back in later x

She won't hate you love, she'll just be happy to see you.

She just thinks I'm tired and that's why she is staying with friends. She's OK with it all really. She's only 7 so I'm trying not to tell her too much as she's so young. Think I'm just a bit riled by a friend's comment that I "have to try" to get out of my depression, else my dd will end up with a Mum with mh issues. I grew up with a Mum with mh issues, so it's touched a nerve and I'm still very fragile really.

hi love, is the friend the one dd is staying with,that made the comment?
crikey - if you knew the key to get out of depression you would be a very rich
lady.

No, the friend dd is staying with is v supportive. This is a different friend.
I know I wish I knew the way out of this though. Feeling suicidal and being separated from your child is absolute torture.

Saw a good thing on face book about "getting over it". Said next time someone says it imagine breaking both their legs and telling them to walk it off. Resonated with me
Struggling big time myself tonight so cannot help anyone. Can't face going home (SH risk at home) been driving around for hours trying not to have an accident & feeling hopeless.