Winter in the village - support for all kinds of MH issues - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis, bipolar...

[creamhearts]

I know the thread is a bit dead but I thought I would start a new one and see if we can keep it going xx

((( mumwithcamera ))) that is a rough start to a morning. Hope ur home now and have put your feet up with a

I feel like a complete zombie this morning as I've had only 2 hours sleep. School run done. I've had a and a diazepam. Hope to have some sleep before school pick up but looking very unlikely

oh i am sorry but that has to be the best autocorrect i have ever seen - torrential reason!!omg!!!!

how very apt for this thread too. i think that could be my diagnosis torrential reason.

feeling so bad today. i think the counselling will be good but i am so scared.

(mumwithcamera) raining here too. I got soaked as well. Hope you are resting a bit now. My dd is 7 and does what I ask now- but I recall those fights to get in the buggy very well! Don't be too hard on yourself, it's not your fault. It's good that you got up with them, though. Not because you need to or have to or anything like that, just because you were saying how you struggle to get up. Well done for doing it. It's a big step.

(pulled) hope you get a sleep today.

Lem I think that could be my diagnosis too; I like that one! Forgive me for not keeping up, are you starting new counselling soon? I know you said CBT, but is this different? I hope it helps you though can empathise with the aprehension. I read (on here I think) that therapy is a messy proccess. I hope you have good support and friends to help. It's a real challenge to dig deep emotionally isn't it? I think it's brave of you to commit to it.

School run done here. Hair drying out(!). Very tired and drained today. CpN is coming in a bit. I feel really scared as last time we talked was before I sh a couple of weeks ago. She isn't very supportive so I'm worried about meeting with her.

Torrential reason! I just saw that

Though I think my Dp would say my diagnosis was the torrential chaos! Not much reason goes on in my head!

Went to meet another mum for coffee and both moaned about PND which made me feel surprisingly better this morning!

torrential chaos is definitely the words of the day. It's pouring down here as well.

Laying in bed but not falling asleep.
Too many negative thoughts going through my head. I just wanna switch off somehow. Gonna try some mindfulness.

Hi everyone

Thanks *pulled, lem". Meeting was v tough. But teacher friend says I got all my points across and her responses were v poor so she didn't show herself in a good light. Don't have much respect for her now. Ds got a special good behaviour award yest which seemed too much of a coincidence.

Sorry exhausted this pm.

Anyone around I feel like I'm drowning in my own negative thoughts

hi pulled
i guess the mindfulness didnt work
are you on your own tonight?

No Frances could not concentrate at all. Head is all over the place, voices/visions are pretty bad. Mood very very very low. No sleep, headache, loss of appetite and horrible flashbacks of child abuse. Feel sooooo much anger building up inside me. I feel Like I'm going to explode :( I don't know what to do. I don't wanna be back in hospital. It's absolutely horrible in there. I'm just so exhausted!

i find distracting helps , can you put a favourite (non sad) cd on that takes you back to a happy place -iykwim
im watching crappy blade 2 - its awful.

do you have any energy to do a fitness dvd - (release some adrenaline.)

pulled - have you tried that emdr therapy?

No I'm exhausted so no energy at all. Can't concentrate on watching anything either. Thoughts of self harm are going through my head

has anything recent happened to make you so bad tonight?

I'm having a lot of flashback of my childhood abuse for the past couple of days. I'm not coping with it all.

I've not been around much lately but pulled I just saw your latest post and couldn't ignore it. Apologies if you've already mentioned but are you seeing a counsellor to help you deal with things? Childhood abuse is so difficult to deal with. Sending lots of safe hugs (If okay). Keep talking and I really hope you manage to get through without self harming. However, know that if you do self-harm that's okay too. It's not an ideal coping mechanism but it is one that helps you get through. Try to show yourself some love and compassion and know that it's okay to cope however you can.

I've got to dash now but thinking of you all here in the village. Take care all xx

i know theyre difficult to stop once theve started.
im sorry your having such a bad night .

are you getting any real life help?

you have a daughter dont you? how old is she?

mines 18 ,and has only just come in from the pub! she has school tomorrow.

Thank you faith & frances

Sorry for disappearing last night I finally fell asleep and woke early hours. Still feeling the same so thinking of ringing the crisis team but don't even know what to say. Have a birthday party on Sunday that I don't wanna miss but I don't think I can continue with putting on a smiley face till then I wanna say something but am afraid of what everyone will say back.

I have been having one to one therapy but it's been hard to talk about or all. I have a friend in real life who I can tell but afraid he will try getting me to go back to hospital which I really don't want to do. I'm just scared

Hi pulled sorry to have missed you last night. Have you rung crisis yet? You could just explain how bad you are feeling, and go from there? I think if it's an ongoing thing that you are getting help for, they prefer to manage things in the community don't they ? When you say 'low'; how 'low' are we talking? I hope you feel safe. Here if you want to talk/pm.

hi pulled , i hoped youd managed to get some sleep.
id say what you wrote last night and i think they are used to people not knowing what to say .
do you think the meds aren't working?
im about to start trauma therapy - psychiatrist told me it will be horrendous ,i will feel worse before i feel better ,having to go through the trauma in great detail over and over again until my flooded brain understands its just a memory - it cant hurt me , im now an adult -i can control any situation -
ect...

Thanks loveis and francis

I just feel like I don't have time to be feeling like this. Got to pick up DD later and feed her tea (not even thought about what to make her yet) then take my dad to his stroke appointment. DD need a haircut so I booked it for tomorrow so gotta DP that then Sunday have the family gathering. It's just nonstop things and I'm just doing them in a zombie mode.

My next therapy will be trauma therapy too frances as the one to one is coming to an end soon (they have no more funding for it). I'm dreading that as I know I have to face it all again n again like you have described.

I dunno what I'm saying I'm just lost in my head at the moment.

Pulled sorry you are feeling so bad. I don't know anything about trauma therapy for childhood sexual abuse but I've seen many posters on here talking about a therapy for PTSD called EMDR or RE-WIND therapy. You could google them and see what you think. Apparently you don't have to go through all the details of the trauma - I'm not sure how it works to be honest but people on here have been really positive about it. Just noticed Francis you mentioned EMDR therapy to pulled - have you heard positive things about it?

Hi to everyone else - just popping by as am pre-occupied at the moment with a serious family illness.

hi NanaNina
I havent tried it , it was mentioned to me by my gp as something my psychiatrist might recommend but after talking to me the psych. thought trauma therapy would be best .

Thanks nana I've heard of EDMR a few times for PTSD from people but never actually looked into it properly. Last time I spoke to my psychologist about it he kinda dismissed it. I'm not sure psych really go for it much as mine has suggested the trauma therapy too.

Hope ur ok nana dealing with ur family stuff.

DD has been home a few hours now and I'm already exhausted of her. I've just come to my room to get alone time though I'm not alone!

I've heard of EMDR pulled. I have PTSD too, a counsellor reccomended it to me but the cost put me off. I wonder if there's anything like it available on the NHS?

Hope you are doing Ok nana

I've had enough today. I went to see a friend but had to leave early as I got suddenly very tired and felt sick. Then I just had a meltdown over housework, it was all just too much. I try and try and nothing gets done. It's all got a bit too much for me now and i'm in pain :(

Sorry don't want to sound self-pitying !

Are you feeling any better pulled?

((( loveis ))) just take it slowly. You can only do what you can. Pain is such a bitch and stops us doing what we want to do. Not sure there is anything on nhs like EMDR but I really doubt it.

I just exploded at my brother because he didn't want to get me fat chips from the chip shop. He was right of course that I'll be ruining the effort I've put in so far with my diet. But did I wanna listen no so I screamed at him till he got me some. I managed to eat half the portion & now I feel sick. Of course I feel fat now too. I'm just so full of rage at the moment

I feel awful for my behaviour. Maybe I should contact the crisis team I'm beginning to act strange!