Winter in the village - support for all kinds of MH issues - depression, anxiety, OCD, psychosis, bipolar...

[creamhearts]

I know the thread is a bit dead but I thought I would start a new one and see if we can keep it going xx

Girlie We are supposed to be going to disneyland. We booked it back in june.

Hi, can I join? I have had anxiety on and off for years. I tend to obsess about certain things - it's been the DC, my lack of friends, my family. Over the last year I've become really nervous about driving. I have a 22 mile commute to work.

This weekend, I was on call from Friday to Monday. I had to go in each day and then maybe have to go back in if needed. And it was icy and snowy and I've been a nervous wreck, even though DH said he'd take me in if need be.

And tonight, I'm on call again, and it's snowing. I have had a ball of nerves in my chest all day, and it's just not going. I've told work I won't come in, but ring for advice (very rarely do we need to go in) I don't know how to relax or to make this better.

Sorry - as I've been saying all day (and weekend)

welcome Susie this is a lovely thread for support. Sorry to hear about your anxiety - its rubbish. Being on call sounds stressful

lem is there anything you can do to reduce the anxiety at all. Have you come across "Square breathing"? or just very calming music on? Thinking of you.

girlie yes it is isn't it! Sounds like you have the meal plan cracked It took me a while for the nausea to stop (tho I wasn't retching) but that was also partly because I'd been suffering from gastritis for four months previously so my stomach was already wrecked. I think it has helped. I also think sleep, exercise and just being a lot kinder to myself - together with a year's therapy has helped. But its impossible to distinguish between all these things. I'm very reluctant to stop taking it though!!! Oh and its great for PMS

have had a terrible night, awake since 3am being sick feel really ill, going to speak to dr but not going to take any more as this is worse than the anxiety!!

Sorry to hear that they make you feel worse girlie.

Im trying chamomile tea to help calm me. Im not sure if it will help at all.

Hi there Susiesue - that sounds really difficult. I don't drive, which is probably just as well!

Girlie - that does sound horrible, I hope the doctor manages to find you a suitable alternative. Its so frustrating because if you can get through the shitty side effects then they do work, but you can't make yourself ill.

How are you feeling CiQ?

Snowy you are very quiet, i hope that you are ok - did you manage to see someone in the end?

I THINK, that the escitalopram are helping more than the citalopram, i am still anxious but its not so desperate, i am on the lower dose just now but will talk to my Dr next week about going up to 20mg, feeling hopeful that it will help. I seem to be jumping from one thing to another with the anxiety and getting triggers all over the place. Actually spending too much time on mnet isn't helping me as there are plenty of triggers on the board, the irony is that i need this thread for support so daren;t go cold turkey. Speaking of cold turkey i haven't had any alcohol this month - the longest i have been for a long time and strangely have no desire for it. Will have to see how that goes!

I find that chamomile tea helps me, i was desperate last year after i found a lump in my breast and chamomile tea (and citalopram and diazepam!!!) helped me through a tough two weeks. So i do believe it does help. I don't really like the taste of it though.

Spoke to the dr who suggested I try 10mg of citalopram instead in a few days, not sure what to think. Feel really weird today, very spaced out and stomach is still not happy.

I'm quite surprised they started you on 20mg actually. 10mg will be better then go up to 20mg. i did that and had hardly any side effects.

when do you take them? i found taking them in the mornings better and having some biscuits to munch on helped with the nausea. do try and give it a go if you can

I did the school run. (Pil came with me though) and I did feel a bit a bit panicky but didn't feel dizzy or pass out so that was good.

well done - that's a great step forward

I'm struggling lem, trying to stay in control.

Finally seem to of stopped throwing up totally knackered though so hope I get some sleep tonight.

Weel done Goood I am congratulating myself on getting dd to an opa appointment (my mum came with us though ) but still I did it and anxiety was o.kay actually not to bad. I am still practicing saying 'it is just anxiety, yes it can make me feel bad but it can't do me any real damage, its just a bunch of chemicals.' It also works for weird or intrusive thoughts, ie its just thoughts they are not real, I don't need to worry about them.'

Seems to be helping a bit.

(((((snowy)))))) hang on. call someone xx

Haven't caught up with thread but wanted to say ((((((( snowy ))))))) I'm sorry you're struggling so much. As lem says, can you call someone?

I'm not doing too great. Sorry to jump in like this without catching up with what's happening with everyone else. GP switched my meds from 100 mg sertraline to 15 mg mirtazapine today. I've got to lower sertraline to 50 mg for 2 weeks and then start mirtazapine. I'm scared of switching. I know it sounds stupid but I can already feel my mood dropping after taking 50 mg sertraline today instead of the 100 mg. I'm terrified of the self harm thoughts coming back as I cross-taper and the suicidal thoughts coming back in full force as I start the new meds :( feel really on edge this evening and like I just want to curl up in a ball under my covers and stay there.

girlie you've reminded me I actually went onto fluox liquid started at 10mg for couple weeks then v gradually increased dose up to 20.. helped a lot x

Hello villagers (old and new) I'm just dropping by and sorry so many of us are struggling. Lots of new people which is good, but I can't remember everyone and so I won't try as I'll probably mix everyone up..........so I'm not ignoring you but just wanted to say hello to:

CIQ Snowy Pulled Silvery Lem and everyone else......

Someone (can't remember who) has become anxious and afraid to go out because she feinted when taking a child to hospital and has been wearing a heart monitor. I just want to say that I feinted in the GP surgery just before Christmas (good place to do it!) but I had a very bad chest infection. Apparently my heart stopped beating for almost 1 min, so was clinically dead! One minute I was sitting on the chair and the next thing I remember was being on the floor with my GP and another doctor leaning over me. They called for an ambulance, and got carted off to A & E, and kept in for 2 days then discharged - thank god. Hospital was awful. My GP came to see me a few days later (she's SO caring and supportive but I've known her a long time) and said the paramedics were with me for 2 hours in the surgery (I was only vaguely aware of them) and was astonished that it was 2 hours. She said there had been a very "worrying half hour" when my BP and oxygen levels were dropping and I was losing consciousness intermittently.

Sorry I didn't mean to post all those details..........what I wanted to say was I was a bit scared when I had to go to the GP surgery again and got anxious, but got someone to come with me and I managed it. Re the heart monitor - I think it's not at all unusual to fit someone with one because measuring pulse/BP/oxygen levels only tells a doctor what is happening at that particular time, whereas the monitor measures over a period of time. It may be that you don't need any meds. I think you should be re-assured that they are monitoring you.

Snowy - I see you are struggling - I know that you are somewhat under stated and I wonder how bad things are for you just now - are you getting any support? Thinking of you.

Yes its good they tested me. I dont think there is any cardio issue going on, definitely anxiety. Its been a bad day today. Felt panicky most of the day.

(((( NN )))) I'm so sorry that happened, it must have been very frightening.

Hi all, I've finally managed to catch up with the thread. It seems so many people are struggling at the moment ((((all))))

I'm seeing a new counsellor at some point on the weekend (haven't had confirmation of the time yet) which I'm actually quite looking forward to in a weird sort of way. Things have actually been okay today and I'm coping much better than I thought I would with the drop in meds, though it's only been two days. Fingers crossed I don't spiral during the changeover.

For those who have borderline personality disorder, how did you get diagnosed? My friend has BPD and we were chatting before about it all and I can't help thinking perhaps I have that either instead of or as well as depression.

Nana that sounds so scary - i hope you are ok.

I am struggling, barely holding it together. I am just so sick of this now.

Sorry i can't be very supportive just now, i feel so awful . DP trying to help by taking me to work with him, which is fine when i actually have something to do but standing watching him work is making me worse.

(lem) how long have you been on the escitalpram now? Keep going, it has to get better soon xx

faith good to hear about the counsellor, hope they're good.

Good sympathies that sounds tough.

Hi to pulled, nana, silvery, girlie everyone else.

OK day, but completely wiped out this eve. Was driving back from a meeting in the dark having trouble seeing the road and managing not to be dazzled by oncoming cars. Could do with another Friday in bed I think but not really an option tomorrow.

take care all

lem I really hope it gets better for you soon.

ciq that sounds scary having trouble seeing! Can you do anything to chill out / get some rest this evening if rest isn't an option tomorrow?

I take it back that I feel okay. I'm not. I just tried reading my book and couldn't concentrate at all even though it's something I usually take great pleasure in. My anxiety's gone through the roof, I'm trying to hold it together but I'm not sure I can. I'm really on edge and fighting the urge to self harm. DP just cuddled me for a while but I'm scared he's going to get fed up and leave. I felt like I wanted to cling to him and never let go even though he's not so much as hinted he's going anywhere.

I hate feeling like this, I hate all of it :(

oh faith that's tough. Are you able to tell your dp how you're feeling and sh temptations? Can he give you a foot rub while you drink camomile tea to the sound of relaxing music or something? Don't mean to sound like I'm taking the mickey, but what best helps you relax?

The concentrating thing is hard isn't it. I have on The Restoration Man which I like, but can't concentrate on that alone so out comes laptop...

College today really finished me off and then I had to go off to a 2 hr meeting which seems to have been the last straw. Bleurh.

Thanks CIQ I hugely appreciate your reply. I don't know why but whenever someone's nice to me when I feel like this I just end up bursting into tears. I've currently escaped to the kitchen as I feel like I need to be alone. No matter how close I feel to DP and how safe I feel with him I still don't like him seeing me upset. Camomile tea and music is a fab idea. I think I'll wash up to some music and then make some, thank you.

That sounds tough having a two hr meeting after college. What are you studying?

Good evening all.

just a quicky from me to update some of the older members of the village.

I FINALLY finished my PGCE and was signed off as a qualified teacher in December. I had signed up to do some supply work and was due to start next week and gradually phase a return.
I had an interview yesterday for a permanent postion though - got the job and start in 2 weeks time! I just hope everything is not happening too quickly for me.

I've just skimmed the recent posts and it seems theirs a bit of a theme with medical problems. This is uncanny because I had my first (probable) panic attack at the beginninh of Dec. I ended up calling an ambulance in the middle of the night as a result of chest pain. I didn't think it was anything cardiac but I didn't know and as I am a single parent to 3 children I started panicking about what would happen to them if anything happened which perpetuated my panic etc. It had all resolved before the paramedic got here but he was lovely. Did an ECG and concluded that it was unlikely to be cardiac. They would usually diagnose probable indigestion but with my history and I had had a horrific week leading up to it he thought it might have been a panic attack (I also had pins and needlrs in my leg, nausea and hot flush followed by extreme chills). I think I might have had one panic attack since, and I'm a bit worried about the intensity of going back to work but we'll see how it goes.

does anyone know if vicar is still around. I'd like to update her with where I'm at now. If no-ones seen her for a while I might PM her :)