community-based psychiatric adventures of the mentally normal

[Mitchy1nge]

am not sure if mavis is still in this one

(I have varying strength nicotine lozenges from 1-4 mg, am not going to DIE of it)

but fuck that shit

have to get money out for farrier anyway

am going OUT

No no better. Slightly more energy. Can move a little easier. DP angry I don't want to get better. Its better like that. Just waiting for him to go to sleep. Sorry I've been a shit.

Hope extra energy level stays

how's it going enpo? are you playing blackjack again?

have TRIED watching other stuff but seem to doing a bit more Jessie Pavelka

Convincing DP its ok to go to the gym. Have promised a text every 15 mins. Hopefully it will convince him everything's fine.

The gym might give you a bit of headspace. Sounds like a good idea.

Not much headspace. He's threatening random phonecalls.

Also have to text every ten minutes. Fucks sake.

Hmmm, I take that comment back then.

why don't you just go to the gym together? Then each do own thing once there

That's ridiculous how can you work out with the distraction of your phone

obviously I don't understand how relationships work

can you reassure him you will ask for help if you feel like harming yourself?

Would be a lie and he wouldn't believe me anyway.

enpo how the fun helps. Home to sinew crap tv and/or less now mumsnet?

I am realising that I really don't want dh home. Things were rubbish even before the fateful day - we had even started going to relate. I seem to have run out of patience and energy and I don't think it's just cos of mh stuff, I think my therapy has helped me realise that being around him brings me down . Ho hum

Fun? Gym... some tv .. Don't know what's going on. .

Ah, I think I might have been misleading. He's the one at the gym. I'm the one immobile and unwashed in a dressing gown. It takes me ten minutes to walk to the toilet. Gym was a nonstarter but I wanted him to go.

This is my good spell. Can type full sentences. Hoping DP falls asleep tonight before I descend back into the horrors or I'll have to do another day of this.

He is back home.

Was taking 10-15 minutes to type a sentence earlier, when I could pick up my phone.

Is it properly over in your head for you and him now CIQ do you think?

Wait no I got the wrong end of the stick, you mean you don't want him home from hospital yet because he is unwell, not because it's over. Sorry. Fuckwittedness. Hope I didn't upset you.

You didn't get completely the wrong end of the stick I just lost a big reply. Things were not good before he went downhill - had been going to relate. I am at my most bleurh when I'm with him. Praying is because he's not been well, but not entirely convinced.

Have you got anyone you can call to get you through the night?

I hope when he is feeling better he will be easier to be around -his illness must've been affecting him, and your relationship, for a fair while before he was admitted.

Sorry about losing the reply - are you on an iDevice? Mine has been having trouble losing posts on MN.

Smartphone but not an apple one.
Yes - fingers crossed.

gosh that's an awkward realisation CIQ not that there's ever a great time to split up with someone how do you know when it's time to get out and when it's worth the effort? Is it wait and see?

hope you sleep ok enpo and tomorrow is a pleasant surprise

am tired but have a mental disorder of not being excessively mentally normal