"putting the SPRING back in our step - village support for depression and anxiety"

[LEMmingaround]

Heres the new thread guys. What is this, thread 9?

This is a thread that is situated in a virtual village of support for those suffering from mental health issues, or just those struggling with what life throws at them.

Please feel free to join in.

I'm keeping an open mind about the new psychiatrist, and I know she only wanted to add meds because of a blip I had last weekend, but it was just a blip.

I'm sorry that your therapist doesn't go for good/bad days NN - surely everyone with MH conditions have them?

Hello all, I've been lurking for a while & too chicken/in denial to post! I've had depression/anxiety problems in the past but all was going well until November when I started feeling it creep back again. Went to the GP & was given Sertraline which I really didn't get on with & couldn't get past day 2, despite trying several times! I've got another appointment tomorrow because I'm really not functioning properly anymore & have 2 small children to look after 24-7. DH is great but he's got to work & then has to come home & clear up from the day's whirlwind activity which leaves him with little time to be especially supportive. He's got his own issues at work too which I think he'd really like me to be supporting him about but he recognises that I can't do that right now.

I'm also sort of planning to discuss my concerns that I might have ASD. I'll probably conveniently forget about that until after the appointment though. Just thinking about the mere possibility of not being believed is giving me a panic attack! Maybe I'll pretend that the depression isn't related to the ASD & sort that out before raising the ASD idea when I'm feeling a bit more stable.

Does anyone have experience of fluoxetine while bf-ing? DS2 is 11m & only feeding once or twice a day just for a couple of minutes so I don't think he's getting much but neither of us are ready to give up completely quite yet. I know fluoxetine has worked for me in the past so I don't really want to faff about trying to force bf-approved medications to work for me if there's something I know is likely to with minimal side effects! I've just got to get myself well as quickly as possible for the sake of my children. It's not fair on them to be cooped up inside all day with me barely able to do more than read a couple of stories with them, when I'm not sobbing over their clearly doomed lives because I'm not frolicking & painting with them 24-7!

Right now I have no idea how I'm going to get through tomorrow. I feel like leaping in the car & going for a very long drive & conveniently not returning until after the appointment. If DH hadn't been working overtime so he could go in late & come with me in the morning I'd probably not go at all. I know I need to pull myself together & just get there. It's blatantly stupid to not go to a Drs appt about depression because you're too depressed to leave the house!

Someone remind me how to breathe normally?!

still here. still reading. just.
exhausted. too much going on to regale you all with.
just to say im still thinking of you all.

so sorry Vicar :(

I am struggling - even though i got the all clear, im not convinced - i can still feel the lump even though they have drained it. I know this is my anxiety in overdrive, i have pins and needles in my arms and head. DP is beyond fuming (with me). I don't know what to do.

(((lem, vicar)))

welcome AGnu and well done for being brave and posting here, and giving the Sertraline a try - that's a great start. It's really hard having depression and looking after young children - many of us on this thread are in a similar position. Mine are a bit older but they ask why I look so grumpy....!

I remember how daunting it is going to the docs about this. But it really is worth doing. GPs see many, many patients with depression and anxiety. I'm on fluoxetine, but I'm afraid I don't know about bf with it. Have you done a search of the threads - there's bound to be some info. I remember too that wanting to get in the car and just drive off.

If you're worried you many not be able to communicate effectively at the GPs you could take in some notes? lots of people do that.

Anyhow I really hope you manage to get to the GPs. Take it as easy as you can with dcs, you're not well, so therefore painting is not required! All the best.

AGnu hello Hope you got to sleep last night and are ready for your appt today. I don't know about meds and bf but your doctor will. Hopefully you'll come away with something to help you and you'll start to feel better soon. Thinking about you - good luck!

((( NN ))) ((( lem ))) ((( snowy ))) ((( vicar )))

Welcome agnu be kind to yourself for a start & yes do remember to breathe it's viral :) this is a great supportive thread as you May have read anyway so feel free to jump in when you want to.

My morning has started too early for my liking but onwards as they say!

Hope everyone has a good morning :)

viral dd

AGnu one technique which is good for breathing:

Find a calm place. Close your eyes. Breath in slowly for the count of three, pause, then breathe out slowly for the count of 5. Pause and repeat. Once you've done that a few times, you can change the counts to 5 and 7, and maybe 7 and 9.

GP refused any medication & gave me a leaflet with a phone number to call & arrange group sessions. I hate phones & I don't have time to be going to regular sessions! She blatantly didn't believe me about the ASD & started talking about how everyone has tendencies. Everyone might have 'tendencies' but when those 'tendencies' are the source of recurrent depression & anxiety I'd say that warrants further investigation! She wants to see me again in a month & did agree to a double appointment to discuss ASD but basically told me I had to prove it or she wouldn't refer me to the people who can tell if I have it!

I'm tired. In more ways than one!

Lol oops just saw the "viral" that was meant to be vital :)

ciq hope ur doing well :)

agnu that sounds terrible of ur G.P. Could you maybe see another G.P at your practice? Do make the call to the group therapy though as it can take sometime to get a place. I don't know where u are but in London it's about 3 months waiting time.

Was that your normal GP AGnu (love that name!). I am very about group sessions - we are all so very different. However i see the use of a support network. Was it because you are BF that she didn't want to give you the ADs? I have heard sertraline is very good but have heard that it is a bit of a bastard (understatement) when you first take it, a few of the ladies on this thread (vicar being the one that sticks in my mind) struggled horribly at first but are now doing really well on it and it has really helped them. There are other ADs in the same family, i am on citalopram

Yes, i do believe we all have tendancies, tendancies towards ASD, OCD, anxiety, depression, psychosis - each and every one of us. Its part of being human. BUT you are right, if those tendancies are exaggerated or to an extreme where they cause someone distress or affect their day to day life then it is not ok to dismiss that and to tell you that its down to you to prove it is the most ridiculous thing i ever heard. I mean, if you wanted to "prove" it, all you would have to do would be to spend a couple of hours on google and list the bloody symptoms to her. Can you ask to see another GP?

Do you think having a "diagnosis" of ASD would help? it may do as it may help you access the correct therapies and gain an understanding of how you are feeling, but there are also therapies that you can access without a "label". CBT is very good - i am considering asking for another session of this beause i started it and didn't engage with it very well because i am a very skeptical person, but actually it has a value in breaking negative thought patterns. There is an online CBT program run by moodgym.com (there is a link on here somewhere) i am going to give it a try because i have been struggling lately. This could work well for you if you can't make time out for counselling - hardly surprising with two young children.

I am really sorry that your GP wasn't very useful after you were brave enough to go and talk to her. Don't be afraid to go back and stamp your feet. We are all here to support you and offer virtual hand-holding. You will get through this.

I have been to the doctors - more diazepam for me - to be taken regularly instead of a one off to get me over this week, she wasn't surprise about my lack of trust in the results but has reassured me and did make a face when i said i was worried beause i could still feel the lump. Pretty much said, well what do you expect - in a nice way - my Dr is so bloody lovely, i wish she could be all of your doctors because she is very thorough, not overly sympathetic (id actually hate that) but she "gets it". She did partly admit to me she suffers from anxiety herself in so many words. So having to draw a line under my cancer fears.

I have to do this because i was so excited about my good news yesterday that i went and told a friend (a mum from school) and she had just (this very week) been given the bad news that her lump was not OK and she needs a mastectomy in about two weeks time, then chemo :( I am so devestated for her, she is such a lovely lovely person - one of the few people at the school who i class as a friend. I am going to have to be there for her, she isn't English (althogh her DH is and her son) and her family are not here, they will come for a short while but other than that she is on her own (her DH is not the easist of people, very cold man) and i can't let her go through this alone. I just don't know where i will find the strength as breast cancer is my biggest fear in life. But i will have to find it - she is my friend.

DP wants me to get a job - I know he is right - having to have a real rethink about what i want to do. Am thinking of working with people with mental health issues (if thats even possible/appropriate), it is really just a thought at the moment but lets face it - we are all bloody lovely so working with more bloody lovely people like you lot could only help me!

Welcome AGnu Could you see another GP? (((( vicar LEM CIQ DD32 ))))

Sorry about yesterday, I was very stressed out Not stressing now as I can't change things.

Snowy what on earth are you apologising for? you pretty much only ever offer support on this thread and is invaluable - i have pretty much hogged it for the past week and you have always been there with support - those hugs, they make a difference funny enough. I am glad you feel less stressed.

I don't know, I think it comes along with feeling low (apologising). My GP is going to ring me next week about the blood tests, always get anxious when there's something wrong - at least I know it's just iron deficiency thanks to the psychiatrist taking a look (that's one good thing about her, she'll look up physical results and explain them, even though that's not her job, it helps with the anxiety).

((((everyone))))

Made it through my appt with the practice nurse this morning to get blood taken, just got to get through my appointment with the GP in an hour ans a half.

Shaking

(((( Victrix )))) Can you make a list of what you want to say/ask?

I am lucky that my GP can ring me next week, there wasn't an appointment until a couple of weeks time, and my GP is always over subscribed.

:) I'm down to 13st 9 lbs

I'm trying to write my list just now, I took a list along for my initial appointment last week that she was keeping with my notes and no real change so I can refer back to that as well if need be. I don't feel like the propranolol has done anything but it's only been a week I suppose

Welcome AGnu I think the GP should have prescribed for you - as you know there are ADs you can take while B/F and it sounds from what you are saying you clearly are depressed. Takes one to know one.....and all that. SO I second going back to another GP and asking for the one you took before that suited you. Maybe as CIQ says you could do a bit of googling to find out what ADs are ok when B/F. To send you away with a leaflet for group therapy is simply not on..........you have 2 babies FGS and can barely summon the energy or motivation to cope with ordinary tasks which is what depression does to us. My worst nightmare would be going to a group to talk about depression and anxiety....YUK. Forget it and get another appointment with a different GP asap.

Re the ASD - I don't want to cause you any more distress but do you think there is a possibility that it is the other way round - that the depression and anxiety is causing you to think you have ASD, as when the brain malfunctions it can do extraordinary things as we all well know. Just a thought. I was convinced I had a physical illness for months and was going to the GP over and over and telling them about my physical symptoms (but not telling them I was having suicidal thoughts) - the symptoms turned out to be anxiety symptoms and I conked out in a fairly spectacular severe depression and on psych ward for 3 months.

The other thing is that I don't think a GP would know or be able to diagnose ASD - it is more the domain of a psychologist/psychiatrist I think, and that might be another reason why she fobbed you off. Can I ask how long you have felt you could have ASD and where you might be on the continuum between mildly affected and severely affected.

Sorry you're still have a tough time Vicar

Lem I'm not surprised you are still worried. I convinced myself I had throat cancer some years ago and the GP was not taking me seriously so I paid to see an ENT specialist and he examined me thoroughly and told me I definitely didn't have throat cancer and I just thought "he doesn't know what he's talking about" and I continued to worry for some time and then it just kind of faded and I think that's a fairly common pattern with health anxiety. Would you feel better if the cyst was removed. Is that an option?

Re working with people with MH problems. I think the only way you could do that would be to train as a psychiatric nurse or a social worker specialising in mental health, and I don't think those would be options that you would choose to do. Both 3 year degree courses.

The other thing is you might be able to volunteer with one of the voluntary organisations like MIND or RETHINK. I've had a snoop around their pages with the idea of volunteering but I couldn't see much beyond fund raising which I don't want to do. The MH trust in my area has something called EBE (experts by experience) and there are several ways I could get involved with this e.g. being part of a panel to improve the service, getting involved with IPs to hear of their experiences and offer support. I haven't done anything because I don't really want to be involved with the hospital where I have been an IP on 2 occasions - and the other part of the trust is several miles away, so I'm not sure. You could see if there was anything like that in the MH Trust in your area.

Hello to everyone - have to go - my CPN is due here shortly. Looking forward to seeing her as haven't seen here for a month and she is so lovely.

I hope your CPN visit goes well, NN

I guess I'm anxious about the blood tests as I ended up in hospital last time. Roll on Tuesday.

Well I made it.

Signed off for another week, switched to citalopram from propranolol. Blood tests due back next Thursday. Managed to pop into a shop and pick up a few bits as well- now back on the couch breathing like I've run 23 marathons.

GP continuing to believe me and not fling me back out into the wild.

Sounds like a productive appointment, Victrix Well done on getting things done!