Suicidal ideation

[walkdowntheavenue]

I've a 3 week old baby and a 3 year old child. I've not been coping for months, had depression untreated all through pregnancy. Over the weekend it got significantly worse. I found myself parked up on a cliff ready to drive off it. Having the kids with me was all that stopped me. I don't want to live anymore. I don't know why I'm even posting.

Hey walkdowntheavenue, sounds like a really tough time, I don't know what to say but I don't want you to feel alone. Would it help to talk about it? I'm sure there are others who will have wise words but if you are feeling desperate how about calling the Samaritans? Here are there details,

www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us

Can you speak to a sympathetic GP and get some advice from there?

Please know you are not alone

Oh dear. Sounds like you're in a very dark place. Do you have anyone in your life you can talk to about this; a partner or a friend? I hope you have a nice HV of GP who you'd feel comfortable talking to, because they'd be in a good position to refer you for help.

I don't have children, so I can't say I know the place you're in now, but I do know what it's like to not want to live anymore. It can pass. The "help" people offer actually can help, so it's really worth giving it a try.

And well done for stopping yourself from driving off that cliff, and for posting. I think you are really brave to have found the strength to carry on, especially for the sake of your children xx

Also, I just want to add, if you don't have a HV or GP you feel you can talk to, or you feel things are urgent, you can alway walk into A&E and tell them you feel you're in risk of doing imminent harm to yourself.

I don't have a hv to talk to, I'll try get to see gp.
I don't see it's going to help, I just don't want to go on. I can't see a future where I don't feel like this. I'm so tired.
I have a partner but things are awful with us. I don't think I love him anymore.

I'm sorry things sound so difficult on all fronts. :( Please do go and talk to your GP. And if they won't jump to action, remember the Samaritans are always there, as is the A&E. I know when you're feeling that bad, everything is going to feel hopeless. :(

Another suggestion of mine is to have a look if there is a Mind office nearby that offers any help.

Please hang in there! Things can get better!

So sorry to read that you're feeling so low. Just to add to what the others said that Samaritans are always there to listen, they don't judge, they're not there to talk you out of anything or dispense any specific advice, rather provide a space to talk about how you're feeling, if you don't feel able to talk on the phone to them you can always text or email them.

www.metanoia.org/suicide/

I can hear that you feel there is no light at the end of your tunnel. That is depression talking, it is not reality however real it feels. Your gp can help. Meds and counselling will help you feel better, you must just take that first step, pick up the phone and make an appointment.