I saw a old friend yesterday.

[selfdestructivelady]

She phoned up my mum crying because of how much I worried her. Sigh it should have been a nice catchup but she was concerned about me shaking and bursting out crying.

Why did you worry her?
Is she usually overly dramatic or might

She have a point?

What happened Self? Why were you crying?

I've just been so suicidal for months and I tried to hide how I feel but was unsuccessful. I'm so tired of fighting this awful illness.

I'm sorry you feel like this. Your friend is obviously worried about you, she must care about you a lot. Are you able to talk to anyone IRL?

I talk to another friend but this friend now wants to meet up again without dc to chat.

That sounds like it might be a good idea, do you not want to?

Sorry just seen this is actually in mental health.
Have you seen a go?

Gp I mean!

She sounds like a really good friend, you probably gave her a bit of a scare - it is very difficult for people to understand mental illness. You don't HAVE to talk to her, its nice that she is concerned but you only have to talk to her about this if you WANT to. Are you on medication? getting counselling? sorry, i know you've posted a bit but i lose track of people sometimes (because i have a memory like a bloody sieve)

I have a pychiatrist and I'm on meds and awaiting therapy. But I've had lots of therapy in the past. Thanks all she is a good friend but I'm just sad that people are worried about me. Now my mum is too.

People only worry about because they love you. I know it feels like a lot of pressure, but it comes from a good place. Your mum would want to know if things weren't going well. Are you a mum? I am and I would definitely want to know.

like LEM said, you don't have to speak to any of them. Give yourself a chance. You're awaiting therapy. Things WILL get better. It might not be an easy path, but they will get better. Keep posting.

Yes I'm a mum I know but right now them worrying is just making me feel worse.

I understand that, really I do, but when you love someone you are there for the good stuff and the bad. I know that it feels like a lot of pressure at the moment, but you are obviously worth worrying about.

If it makes you uncomfortable, try not to focus on it. Try to focus on getting yourself better. That is your main goal. Openness about mental illness, in my opinion at least, takes some of the scariness out.

You will not always feel like this

Thank you very much.