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Original poster

Banishing the winter blues, warming each other up in The Village

998 replies

LEMoncehadacatcalledSANTA · 20/12/2013 21:52

Err, we need a new thread guys - I know this is Vicar's job so i hope you like the name.

This thread is a support group for those with mental health issues and generally feeling crap, some of us are on medication, some of us have help.

So come on in, grab a stool at the pub, the fires warm and the welcome is warmer - stay a while or move right on in!

All welcome

Ha! im not very good at this!

OP posts:
ColouringInQueen · 28/01/2014 14:40

(((hugs)))spc thank you for responding. This morning on the back of last week seems to have sent me into a tailspin Sad. He is looking for work. He seems to be accepting that he might have to start out with projects that aren't his ideal ones. Can't believe the extent of my anxiety around this. But this and the whole excluded by friends thing is proving deadly. Bit annoyed - thought I was a bit more resilient now, but hey ho.

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 15:00

Ciq I hear you about "what is real" and i think the answer is what feels real, for you, at that time. So please dont doubt yourself. Your dp sounds a bit like mine with unrealistic expectations I have had soooo much anxiety over dps business in the past. The only way I can deal with that is be involved interfere I do the invoicing and book keeping but has also taken to organising his diary or he lets things slide. That in itself is stressful but better than not knowing wtf is going on.

Am pissed off with him though. He is working round corner from school. Im run ragged with his tax snd then got soaked walking my mums dog. Asked him to do pick up but hes too busy. Not feeling the love today! Not so much as a thankyou from my mother Hmm

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 15:39

Struggling :( need to hold it together long enough to do tax return. Have to go through dp's statements with him tomorrow. Don't think I can do this :( can't stop shaking

TheSparklyPussycat · 28/01/2014 15:46

LEM this can't go on. Your DM is making you ill.

SnowyMouse · 28/01/2014 15:46

(((( All )))) So many people having a tough time at the moment Sad

Can you try some deep breathing or square breathing, LEM ?

Big hugs all.

NanaNina · 28/01/2014 16:11

Hello to all of us.........like you say Snowy so many of us are having a tough time at the moment. Sorry Lem about your mom - she really is a PITA isn't she. Pity you can't bring yourself to detach from her a bit - emotionally and practically. I now SPC Lem's mum us making her ill, but she has a "hold" over her doesn't she Lem. I know you had a really good therapist a while ago - did you talk about your mum then I wonder. Would it be worth getting therapy again.

Hello CIQ are things any better with you and DH - I seem to remember things weren't good and ditto to what others have said about these "friends" - you don't need people like that it in your life and it says more about them than it does about you.

Hello Hoochy what is the job exactly - I think you were talking about adult services but haven't been on the thread for ages. Are you feeling stressed?

And Snowy the "non-complainer/thinking of others" member of the group - you have such a sweet nature. Are you getting to art therapy this week?

Sorry can't remember the new names.

I am still feeling mega crap and say therapist this morning (first time she has ever seen me in a bad state) and I was crying and shaking which is what I normally do on bad days. She was really good and helped me to slow my breathing down, in through the nose and blowing out through the mouth very slowly, and she put her hands on my shoulder as I was breathing so they didn't hunch up, and asked me if I could lower my voice because tension in my throat makes me talk in a high pitched whiney way. She said when she first saw me I was having a panic attack - I must have been having them for ages as that's how I always am on bad days.

What's "square breathing" Snowy

SnowyMouse · 28/01/2014 16:15

this

I hope to get to art therapy, if the transport turns up. My CPN said it was important to go.

ColouringInQueen · 28/01/2014 16:46

(((lem))) step away from the tax return. Make a drink, step outside for some fresh air and deep breaths (sorry bossy mode), find a nice story to read to your dd maybe?

Thanks nana. Dh and I are muddling along. Not quite as angry and grumpy towards him generally - it comes and goes tbh. I am realising that he really doesn't "get" me often. This morning I had to explain when I was making a joke. The jokey teasing my dad used to do when I was a kid was missing in his house so he doesn't get it/takes it personally. It's weird when you recognise significant differences at this stage in a marriage. Honestly though if we didn't have dc I don't know if we'd still be together!

Really sorry to hear you're having a rough time at the moment. (((hugs))) I'm the same with the anxiety Confused. Good that she saw you like that though - makes it clear how you are! Hope you have a more peaceful afternoon.

Hi snowy that square breathing looks good. It reminds me of my "alternate nostril breathing" from yoga which I find helpful

here

DumDum32 · 28/01/2014 17:38

Off to hospital to be admitted - likely to be a week stay :( not feeling good about it at all.

(((Hugs to all struggling & who need it)))

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 17:42

Oh dumdum thats pants :( I hope you manage to get on an even keel xx thinking of you

SnowyMouse · 28/01/2014 17:45

Good luck DumDum32, thinking of you lots.

ColouringInQueen · 28/01/2014 17:45

Oh (((dumdum))) hope you feel better for it in the end. take care

ColouringInQueen · 28/01/2014 19:13

dd "mummy you look really sad this evening" Sad

SnowyMouse · 28/01/2014 19:28

(((( CIQ ))))

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 20:07

There must be something in the air :( so sorry everyone is feeling so rubbish.

Feeling a bit better here. Dp running me a bath ( I should think so to!) Am going to have a big cold glass of wine and read my kindle.

SnowyMouse · 28/01/2014 21:20

That sounds nice LEM
I'm struggling Sad

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 21:31

Hang on Snowy xx

LollipopViolet · 28/01/2014 21:36

One of my relatives has finally had her baby DS this evening - 4 months to the day after we lost my granddad.

I'm feeling very emotional - happy for her, sad that granddad never got to meet her DS.

And annoyed as I'm in the Midlands, she's in Scotland and I can't go for cuddles! Grin

LEMmingaround · 28/01/2014 22:59

You will have to plan a holiday Lollipop - congratulation to your relation :) some happy news. Sad about his grandad, my father died when DD was 8 weeks old but he never saw her because he was too sick. I talk to her about him all the time and i can see him in her in all the things she does. She has inherited his lovely gentle nature :) I take after my mum Hmm

SnowyMouse · 29/01/2014 10:11

No transport yet Sad

NanaNina · 29/01/2014 14:38

Oh Snowy that is just not on...........FFS why can't they provide transport for you? Hope it did eventually come and you got to art therapy.

SnowyMouse · 29/01/2014 15:27

It came late but I got there, 3 more sessions to go.

LEMmingaround · 29/01/2014 18:35

So glad you got to go snowy :) What did you do today?

Well - the tax return is filed!! thank god for that! My DP had taken over keeping records last year when i got sick - christ on a bike, i can't let him do that again, nothing tallied, had to go through his bank account with a fine tooth comb and work out why i had payments that didn't match invoices etc because clients had sometimes lumped payments together or rounding things up, just DP neglected to update, i was having to add it all up to find out what was what!! He is a fantastic builder/carpenter but should not be let anywhere near the accounts! You can imagine how stressed i felt! Shock I am finally sitting down and i am very tempted to turn off my phone! Managed to get my mum to the doctor today so tht was good. Then there was a baby seagull in her garden wiht a broken wing :( It had a bloody good go at my hand when i bundled it into the cat carrier. My mum feeds its mother and you could see her on the roof getting really distressed, poor thing - it didn't end well for the baby either because it had snapped its main wing bone clean in two so was put to sleep :( Had more running around after tablets etc. To say i am knackered is a bloody understatement. My house is a tip and ive stuff to do for the PFA but i am very tempted to have a duvet day tomorrow.

NanaNina · 29/01/2014 18:47

Glad you got there Snowy - are you enjoying it. I imagine it might suit you better than a "talking group" as you strike me as being quite a private person........I know you're struggling and I wish they could get your meds sorted.

LollipopViolet · 29/01/2014 18:51

LEM baby will be spoilt by both his granddad's - I meant we lost my granddad (my cousin's uncle) 4 months ago.

I am in self-destruct mode with my eating. Cannot get a grip. Put off going to weigh in til Saturday hoping it'd get my head back in the game. It has not. Tomorrow is a new day, and all that.