Banishing the winter blues, warming each other up in The Village

[LEMoncehadacatcalledSANTA]

Err, we need a new thread guys - I know this is Vicar's job so i hope you like the name.

This thread is a support group for those with mental health issues and generally feeling crap, some of us are on medication, some of us have help.

So come on in, grab a stool at the pub, the fires warm and the welcome is warmer - stay a while or move right on in!

All welcome

Ha! im not very good at this!

I've just watched cool runnings. Thoroughly recommended. Very difficult not to laugh out loud

Thanks everyone for the (((hugs))) & suggestions to keep occupied. I've been taking sleeping tablets to knock myself out :(

still the same no change :( :( :(

How are you doing today dumdum?

I can't seem to get going today - seems like a good week has finished me off .

Hope everyone else is hanging in there!

(((ciq)))

I'm just blank at the min :( think it's the meds increase making me like this as it always does. No amount of cigs r making a diff so just stopped smoking for today.

((((Hugs to all hanging in there))))

Well giving up cigs may be a positive thing dumdum, i have never smoked but i can't imagine the nicotine cravings help things. I hope you start to feel better soon - if its your meds, do speak to your mental health team if you have one and keep them aware.

DP got stuck getting a tyre fitted today so the whole day wasted. DD quite happy playing on her wii though. I have a week of "work" so am pretty nervous, its only doing something for DP but he isn't able to be on site with me so im bricking it.

Good luck lem u will be great am sure :)

I'm distracting myself with tv watching "the voice" repeat so far doing the trick. My brother has taken little one for a bit round his friends so getting some me time. Not feeling any cravings for a cig either so am happy with myself for that!

I have name changed not sure about this one but it'll do for now. "Work" was good I ache like hell:) I need to do more of this!

My potential wedding booking fell through, but the couple were lovely and said if their venues were a bit closer together they'd love me to do their pictures. But as they're a good few miles apart and the wedding is in December, they'd worry about my ability to get there with not driving. I'm OK with that, I'd rather people were honest straight away :)

Got lots to do in preparation for my first meeting at the children's centre on Thursday - I'm very excited but VERY nervous too!

You'll be fine. You are doing so well

Ha, I wasn't this morning when I had raging insomnia! I think I got maybe 4 hours sleep. Not good.

Hoping for more tonight as I've got a skating lesson tomorrow. Need to be awake or lovely coach will be putting a toepick somewhere painful!

She is genuinely lovely, and would never do that, but does despair when my skills take an unexpected holiday!

Hi everyone,
hoping you're all doing ok today.

Back to my counsellor after a Christmas holiday, and it was helpful. I've been feeling v flat the last few days and struggling to work out why. Was good last week up til Fri when DH had a big pitch. He still hasn't heard. Basically I am struggling to keep the faith with his business venture. Back in Dec he was v optimistic he'd have 3 clients sign up in Jan. We have one paying only a tiny amount. I'm not sure he's being realistic, but I don't want to be completely honest in case it bursts his bubble totally and he ends up depressed again. His bad few days over new year have put me on edge. Counsellor asked where I was getting support for this anxiety - and I thought actually on here is the only place. So need to fix up a coffee with a rl friend whose ear I could bend. I know it's reasonable stuff to be anxious about, but need to get past the anxiety a bit to get a bit more info on his offering, but historically anxiety has made it impossible to concentrate!

Hey ho. Just have DD home after school today so hoping she's in a good mood and we can find something to do that we both want to do... grrr anxiety is trying v hard to take over...

Hope everyone is ok today. I'm still lurking if that's ok - I'd like to ask a question. How do you manage to get through counselling sessions? does anyone have any tips?
I spent the morning doing nothing, getting increasingly on edge about it and almost panicked a few minutes before. We didn't speak of anything too deep, just about holidays, my DS, his behaviour and his referral but even then I could barely concentrate enough to speak about it and have to fight off a snow storm in my head (like empty fuzziness which is blank). It seems to take an extraordinary amount of effort to string a sentence together. He clearly noticed as he cut short the session (or maybe I'm imaging it - he said he had to go and wish the cleaner happy birthday) and said he wants to speak again in a couple of days. I seem to be totally unable to function today and am worried because next time I'll have the children with me. Now I just feel totally shaky and a bit sick.

Well done for getting through it, Khimaira, it sounds like it was ok. It might be easier with the kids there to break the ice
Love to all, esp CiQ.
Well done LEM, little steps,eh my work is ok. I get really easily worried that I'm not doing stuff right, and get little waves of bleakness..but that's normal for me. It's helped to remember to eat and drink and go for a walk now and then.
Hello Snowy

Thanks hoochy. Brilliant that you're keeping going with work I'm sure you're doing a good job. Hope you have your feet up now.

Have just read through DH's business plan and cash flow forecast. Optimistic forecasts I think. I don't think he'll end the year in the black as he forecasts. He sent them in an email and said "be kind to me". Well I know encouragement is important, but so is reality does that sound really harsh?

hi khimaira counselling is often not easy ime. Is there anything you can do to distract yourself before your session? Or go for a walk to help with the anxiety (apol can't remember if you have DCs with you before). For me at the start, and still some weeks its hard to string a sentence together - that's a sign of your anxiety ime. But keep going. Try not to worry about the counsellor, he sounds like he's on the ball. I always find I need some downtime after to process everything and recover a bit - hope you're able to even if it means dcs watch some tv. take care.

Thank for the kind words hoochy and CiQ. And for making me feel a little less alone. I will have the DC's before and after next time so that will distract me.

I'm no help, I'm afraid CiQ, no experience about business whatsoever. Could you suggest he does a second, not so optimistic forecast to see what the results would be and come up with a plan to see how he could try and ensure it's the first forecast he's working towards.

(...crawls back under a stone to lurk some more...)

hi all......long time no see!

ive had my surgery and am now recovering at home though i have to say physically i am very very well. i get my clips out tomorrow (hurray! they are driving me mad - i have contemplated unsealing my clip scissors and doing the bloody job myself!)

i just really wanted to pop on firstly to say happy new year to everyone - lets hope its a good one and we all beat the blues.

secondly really just to say that i find myself needing the village a little less these days - i have mixed emotions on that score - i m sad about it in some ways but glad that it means recovery is very much underway for me.

im still a complete bed head.....i think my natural make up is always going to be night owl. (late to bed, late up! but i do have that luxury and am mindful that sometimes its ok) my new woof is forcing me to get dressed and get out. i try not to chastise myself if that doesnt happen until lunch time!

but i feel so much better now than i did. im still on the sertraline and im scared of coming off it....i may well need you all when that happens - but for now im very aware that im not here so much and im trying not to put myself under pressure to post because i feel i have to or because i feel responsible for the threads - im very glad that these threads have taken on a life of their own and are providing such amazing support whether im here or not!

so i just wanted to say if in not here in body i am in spirit and i will still seek the village out and lurk even if i dont need to post.

you, my village family have all been so amazing, the support here is real, solid, tangible and so precious, it doesnt matter that we havent met in real life - these threads, this board, all of you here now - old and new posters alike, were my life line when i was in the grip of depression that i didnt even recognise i had.

you are all wonderful and i mean that. i wish everyone here a happy and healthy 2014. (rather belatedly!)

just in case im not here for a bit.....
love you all and the support, solidarity and advice you all freely give. x

So good to hear from you vicar. Glad your surgery went well. No pressure to post of course thiscwill always be your village and you will always be given a warm welcome home. In the pub by the fire. We are all on a journey and at different dtages. Im feeling stronger so moving forwards I hope. I don't think I woild have got thtough this year without this thread it has been my life line

I'm doing OK - have got my 2 stone award at Slimming World today :) I'm actually focused on my mum - her recent Facebook postings make me think she's struggling, so I'm going to try and cheer her up with a nice day out when she's got some time off later this month :)

And I might just have to buy her a small gift while I'm out tomorrow :)

lem - ditto. you all feel like family. the support on here is worth so much more than anything i had in real life. im really touched and im so glad these threads became wihat they have and are so useful for people. my initial selfish post was 8 threads ago.....i had no idea that my ramblings in those early threads would help people but im so incredibly glad that these threads evolved and became such a wonderful supportive place.

you all have a piece of my heart. and i mean that.

Well done voilet on the weight loss :)

Nice to hear from u vicar & glad surgery went well :)

I've lost 1stone 3 lbs in three months aswell so am over the moon with the result - still got another 2 stones to go but am optimistic now :)

Hope all r well & bug hugsssss xxx

I'm glad your surgery went well, vicar

Just noticed "bug hugs" sorry that was "big hugs"

Come on in, True and make yourself at home :)

I've no experience of SSRI's so hopefully someone will be along soon who can answer your questions.

I've had an ACE day! Meeting went well, film has been given the go-ahead and I joined the book club that some of the mums run amongst themselves at the children's centre I'm volunteering at :)

They are such a lovely bunch, I'm normally awful in big groups of new people but I felt so welcome, no one even cared I don't have any children yet.

I'm also pretty certain I'm now a size 14 on the bottom half, for the first time in years, after trying on some jeans in a couple of shops :)

So, I'm currently flicking between the internet and a copy of Atonement i've been loaned from book club :)

true it does take a while for SSRIs to kick in properly, but the signs you've described are good - and I know how hard it can be to consult a doctor about these kinds of symptoms.

It is also good that you and DH have made a practical decision about your financial situation, sad though that decision must be. Far better to act to take control than to sit helplessly worrying and doing nothing.

Yes it will be stressful downsizing, however you seem to be acting as a team (which I never had in my own marriage, now over), and that bodes well for the future, whatever it may be.