if you feel those winter blues, move to our Village, spread the news!

[ThatVikRinA22]

new thread folks.....im losing track but i think this might be our 7th!

all welcome. old and new. This is a supportive place for anyone suffering with any type of mental health issue.

im on Sertraline (ADs) and have been since last December. I had 6 months off work with depression and anxiety and the ladies on these threads kept me going.

Feel free to post, to comment, to ask questions, or just to lurk and feel less alone.
everyone in the village is lovely.

Well done Milk, that's very impressive, and inspiring regarding my own job seeking situation

you don't know me but YAY Milkhell that is brilliant and inspiring.

Morning everyone.
I am going to take small steps to change things.
I cut my tablets down last night and will see if that helps.
I am going to spend less time in bed.

This morning I have put on the dishwasher
DH has taken the boys to school and am trying very very hard to not snuggle back down.

I hope you all have a good day. x

Hope you have a really good day to NeverKnowingly
Am off to my interview soon ....

Does anyone else feel that family life is really, really overwhelmingly chatotic?

What I feel I need is more stability and structure but with me going back to work, DH's shift changes, nursery day changes etc etc I'm finding it difficult to juggle. Is this quite 'normal' or symptomatic of my MH issues?

Yes have a good day neverknowingly.

Good luck with interview Juggling. Breathe

Also did you ladies' mh issues start with PND. Just chatting to our builder who's wife has a personality disorder - hers did and she has never recovered.

Hmm, sat in a waiting room for the third time this week. Art therapy was ok this morning.

How's everyone doing?

Hope your first day back is going well milk.

Hey all sorry but I just can't keep up with the thread :(

Hope all r well.

snowy good to hear art therapy going well.

For me they have stop threatening hospital since I had the op As they think the best place for me ATM is at home. Am so glad about that. Just too many meds ATM making me drowsy!

Big hugs to all especially those struggling xxx

Milk I am firmly of the opinion that the kind of pressure you describe is responsible for many MH issues, life for you young 'uns seems very hard these days.

Hello everyone

I have just found this thread and can identify with a lot of the problems people have.

My background is

highly strung childhood with several anxiety issues, fear of the dark,fingernails down to the quick, couldn't sleep a whole night in my own bed till I was 9. Badly bullied at primary school.

Depression arrived with puberty. Parents put it down to "sulking" but as time went on my mother repeatedly told me that I wasn't normal and should see a psychiatrist. GP totally out of his depth and fobbed off continually.

Married at 19 had DD1 at 20 terrible PND totally unable to look after baby so went home to mother. DS1 born 2 years later even worse PND referred to psychiatrist and put on very strong meds. Marriage ended.

Up and down several years them married again to a man 28 years older. All seemed well DS2 born and no PND. Marriage became rocky as my older children reached teens ending with DD1 telling me that DH2 had sexually abused her for years. Marriage ended,

now happily married to DH3 children grown up and gone.Still episode of depression and health anxiety, treated with Venlafaxine. Thought the worst was behind me then DH diagnosed with cancer. Depression is trying to come back. I have a very good GP now who understands me but every day is a real struggle. I am getting lazy with the house work and sit around a lot. Have retired from work which doesn't help but am 64 now.

Over the years I have become such a good actress that most of my friends would be amazed to know I am on medication. I feel ashamed to suffer from it and sad that I have passed it on to one of my DS's. He self medicates with alcohol.

Sorry this is so long but now you know me can I join your group?

Welcome drudge, everyone's welcome.

You are more than welcome drudge, it sounds like you have had a lot to cope with in your life. I am sorry to hear about your DH and i hope that they manage to succesfully treat it. Please don't think you have passed your depression onto your DS, life is tough and some people struggle - I also self medicate with alcohol, but am on citalopram which helps with the anxiety. Its good here, no one judges x

Welcome drudge that sounds tough. Really hope your dhs treatment works well and soon.

milk I think if you're both working and have kids the juggling can be mind-boggling and stressfull with good mental health. Imo it makes us more vulnerable. I used to work but haven't for 18 months and it has helped on the stress front but I'm fortunate we can manage.

snowy good to hear about the art therapy. Hope you're home and cosy now.

Hi everyone, it's been so busy I'm struggling to keep up. Also tbh feeling a bit weird about not working/job seeking with all you amazing women doing both. But hey ho am trying to make the most of it! Got loads done this week at home Inc tackling the family finances today so that's been satisfying.

Had interview this afternoon. Think it went ok.

One thing slightly annoyed me though - it was through an agency so I had to fill the registration form in. Including the medical section. The consultant then looked at it and obviously saw I was on medication. I think that should have been "confidential" and only anyone on occupational health should have seen it.

Well done Orlando. Was thinking of you.
My interviews today went OK. Will hear later this week.
Have another one (part two of one of today's) on Friday.
Going out for an XMas meal with friends tomorrow so that will take my mind off things nicely I think.
Don't usually have several interviews in one week - it must be like buses!

You're right re: Occ Health Orlando I'm glad it went ok though. Fingers crossed for you juggling

Orlando! You had to declare you were on medication?! What on earth?

I really sympathise with those who have interviews. My body just releases shed loads of adrenaline in such situations and terror ensues! You'd luck with yours Juggling. What are they for?

I am fairly new to having MH issues (first anxiety after DS 2.8 years ago and anxiety/depression with this baby who is 7mo). I was wondering if I could pick the brains of those ladies more experienced.

I have seen a psychiatrist twice now about what was 'wrong' with me. He says anxiety and no meds required. Do I trust in this diagnosis. Are psychiatrists the kind of top dog when it comes to MH issues? I've also had the crisis team out a fair few times.

Also hello drudge - you sound like a really interesting lady and I hope to glean lots of experience from you. I'm 32 and it seems like you've walked a similar path to me. Is there anything you would have done differently after your PNDs? How long did it take you to recover and what kind of symptoms did you have? I suppose I'm after a bit of hope that this loving nightmare will end.

With the juggling thing - I'm just finding it incredibly overwhelming at the moment. I feel I need to just have a very simple life and would really benefit from routine and stability. Knowing what's happening each day. I'm a journalist but I'm honestly thinking of looking for a stress free job - Tesco or something. It would get me out of the house but not totally overwhelm me IYSWIM? I LOVE journalism though. It's such a shame MH issues seem to take over and shape your life.

• good luck

• living nightmare! Ha!

Psychiatrists specialise in meds and diagnosis, Milk You can always ask for a second opinion, it may take some time though. Do you have regular contact with anyone?

No Snowy. I just strongly feel it's postnatal and he doesn't think so. He was an amazing man and I really want to believe what he's saying - ie told me I need to keep myself very busy and get back to work. I've implemented the changes but still feel massively 'off'. Waves of panic and terror hit me and it feels largely chemical - like I'm totally at the will of the chemicals released in my body if that makes any sense at all. I am not the person I've become.

Snowymouse says take 10mg but leaflet said can take 20mg and wanted guranteed sleep that night as had such a crappy day dont take temazapam much as woried wont get anoter prescription was taking zopliclone nigthtly before that.

Today I achieved a bit round the house.
younger 2played up and rowed.
ended up beng sick before pm school run when kids downstairs and instantly felt calmer.
I dident eat much during day but tea time was starving so had a small bowl pasta.

Had slightly sleep convo with hubby about crunches sand fitness and he said that i would need to do fitness followed wit dieting and i wasent one to stck at comitment and get down to size 8 which upset me. I have lost 5lb last few weeks. im not underweight im top half of limit for height ad fed up of only wearing half my wardobe sorted it out today pit stuff dident fit at pile in the back.

I think right now i hit a plataue as was so good last week and no movement on scales or with tape measure.

I know he does not mean to be insensitive he has no idea of how i feel or what i been up to last few months its as if es oblivious to it all and so wrapped up in his new job and bloody mil.

I have exercised for last 2days.
spent 20mins in tears this afternoon as felt overwhelmed.
managed to get my shit together for school run hardly speak to mant at school.

Hes off tommorow and wants to spend quality time together.

Hope everyone else is ok.

welcome drudge

someone up there ^ must be looking after my boy (i hope its dsis) he bought bitcoins in 2009......

he just sold 5 of them to pay off his overdrafts - he paid 69 cents for each coin.
he just sold 5 for $5000!!! (he had to pay fees and convert it to £££ but still paid off his overdrafts- both of them - the bank stopped his account thinking something fraudelant was happening! lol!!)

i cant decide whether he is the luckiest fluke alive or just a genius. When he came home last week he saw a job, applied, interviewed and technically tested, got job within 3 days of applying! i am erring toward genius.....

he is paying for my dishwasher.....

i have had a lovely lovely text from a colleague on another group tonight. Very supportive and very lovely - the young chap who fought my corner the other night had spread the word - he was absolutely lovely to me in the face of a crisis and being bullied by others - he took a stand and refused to join in which i have to salute him for. he isnt on my team but he was so kind and has told others on his own team that i am having a bit of a struggle again.....so i have had a lovely text from someone on that team. i feel supported and quite honoured....the chap who stood up for me isnt really known for that kind of thing.
(someone somewhere likes me! squee!!)
i feel the public enemy number 1 most days at work so its a welcome change to have someone in my corner. i am having some time off now. i needed to book leave but it was all getting a bit much again for me - having said that i stayed over my last shift by 2 hours to get straight before i went off - feel better for it.

my puppy has made me laugh today - he is so cute. He is forcing me out of bed on a morning (he needs his breakfast!) and is doing me good. i bought him a new toy today and he and my old little dog have been having a tug o war.....little dog won! he laid down and she dragged him by the toy clampled in his jaws....he is only 11 weeks old but 4kg heavier than little dog and much bigger in stature - yet he is gentle as a lamb and always lets her win. she is a cav - he is a german shepherd! he could squish her with one paw but he is so sweet with her....

anyway. enough waffle from me. hope everyone is managing ok....this depression mularky is a bit of a roller coaster.....

Just want to curl up today but have two DCs to look after. This is so hard.

How do people switch their mind off?

Did not get much sleep last night. I had to do an Excel task yesterday (again). I am very good at Excel but I slightly misunderstood the task. So I went ahead, analysed the data, showed my Excel skills but just did not use the data "correctly". When the guy came back, I checked as I thought that I had misunderstood - I then realised what I should have done - which was a far easier task than I had made it!

So he said that he could see I had good ICT skills. I'm just really annoyed at myself again for just not getting it right - when I know I can.

Thanks everyone for the welcome. It makes a change to be with people who understand how you feel.
Milkhell

My PND was 40 years ago so I expect treatments have changed a lot in that time, but I do still remember the awful feelings that I suffered. Standing in a call box in floods of tears to my mother because I felt that the baby deserved someone better than me as a mother and feeling so sorry for DD1.

One snotty GP visited the house at the request of a neighbour who realised how bad I was and left a letter for me to take to an appointment with a psychiatrist. Of course I steamed it open and he was very rude about my appearance and the state of my house which is why I get so worried if I get behind with the housework to this day.

After DD2 I was admitted to hospital in a ward where we were all awaiting assessment prior to going to other wards. Quite a mixed bunch. I got friendly with a very young Mum with PND who was allowed to bring her baby with her. Two or three times a week she had Electric Shock Treatment and sometimes she couldn't even remember who her baby was.

I am still very wary of crying in public , can't remember the last time I did,. because to me it goes with being locked up.

Looking back, I was always falling in love with totally unsuitable people because the adrenaline rush that goes with it wipes out the depression. But it comes back worse than ever.