if you feel those winter blues, move to our Village, spread the news!

[ThatVikRinA22]

new thread folks.....im losing track but i think this might be our 7th!

all welcome. old and new. This is a supportive place for anyone suffering with any type of mental health issue.

im on Sertraline (ADs) and have been since last December. I had 6 months off work with depression and anxiety and the ladies on these threads kept me going.

Feel free to post, to comment, to ask questions, or just to lurk and feel less alone.
everyone in the village is lovely.

Milk yes I am fine now - it was my marriage causing my depression (mostly), not my depression causing my relationship problems as I had thought for too many years. My depression lifted the day I filed the petition over 2 years ago now.

Looking forward to Dr Who. I saw the first ever episodes, I was 11 at the time and we had just got our first telly.

Ooh, there's a Dr.Who emoticon for the occasion
How did I miss that?

sontaran love the name change!

ed brilliant to read your post - delighted for you

milkhell its beef stroganoff, wine and doctor who for us tonight wonder how many will be watching it!

juggling sounds lovely. We have a fire going too so perfect... Just need to get rid of the drafts and get my blanket out!

hoochy lovely to hear from you. Will you be doctor who-ing tonight?

snowy, lem will you join us?

OK, so whose everyones fav doc then?

Just a quick wave & hugs to all. Got a new phone (iPhone) so spending quality time with it Lol.

I'm prob gonna b in hospital come Monday not having a brilliant time ATM.

Love to all xxx

My Favourite doctor - has to be Tom Baker - but to be fair, David Tennant is good eye candy!

Good to see you posting dumdum xx

Thanks lem how u been? X

had a good few days Dumdum, thanks - hoping you are managing. Do you thnk hospital will be a help? hope so

Oh good to hear. I'm not sure hospital will help but not sure hw much of a fight I can put up with ppl around me to not go in. My experience of hospital has always been rubbish - I find staff just not interested & are just there to give u pills. I need long term therapy but there is a long waiting list so still have a few months wait :(

Duddum - who is wanting you to go in hospital?

dumdum32

Milkhell my family & partly my stupid voices!

I've rediscovered crochet today - VERY relaxing, and my granny square blanket is actually starting to become, well, square, instead of the oval mass of holes it usually turns into.

Have some lovely, soft, baby marble wool, and am making a blanket for my 3rd cousin's baby boy, who will be arriving in January :)

dumdum32 I have no experience of hospital but a few months who I could have (should have?) been there. The crisis team actually talked me out of it. They said "Now you don't want to do that, do you?" suggesting it wasn't the nicest place to be.

Is there any way you can have get this sorted at home? I might not know what the hell I'm talking about. X

Lollipop I've heard it's great! I love knitting but can only knit holey squares...Not much use. I love sewing too on the sewing machine making simple things like lavender hearts etc. You've inspired me to get cracking again.

Hello all - lovely to hear you are doing so well Ed - your posts are sooo different from the ones of a few months ago - you just sound so "together" if you know what I mean. It must be tough teaching and having 3 young ones at home but I have great admiration for you in getting back into teaching.

Vicar that sounds very tough and you are reinforcing the ideas that I have about the police - I'm afraid I don't have much respect for them. I suppose there are good ones but I reckon a lot of them are very "up themselves" or that's how they come across to me (though only see them on TV) maybe you have to be a bit ruthless to go where angels fear to tread?

Hoochy Be interested to hear about your new job? Am I right in thinking this is your first social work post since you qualified. Really hope you will get good support as I think this is vital in those early months. I was so lucky to land in a team of experienced workers, and I learned so much more from them than ever I did in college, though of course the placements give you some idea of social work practice. Are you going into Childrens or Adult Services?

Snowy - hope you had a good time with your family today

DumDum - I agree with you about hospital. My experience was similar to yours. The nurses don't bother with you, other than to dish out meds. The nursing assistants used to sit with the patients, but they just talked to each other, over our heads sometimes. Very rude. Also I found it intensely boring and would have to be sectioned before I would go in again. Having said that if you need to be in then that's different, and you just have to put up with it in order to get well.

Hi to everyone else - sorry I can't remember everyone.

Thankyou Nana and everyone else that has commented.

I just want to highlight what you have just said:

Hello all - lovely to hear you are doing so well Ed - your posts are sooo different from the ones of a few months ago - you just sound so "together" if you know what I mean.

I think that this is my message for everyone on this thread that is struggling. You can recover. You will recover. Whether you have been on the thread a year or a week. Just be kind to yourself and give yourself time.

Just over a year ago I had a 'nervous breakdown' of some description. I wouldn't get out of bed. I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't string a sentence together. I was slurring my words. I was sleeping 18hr a day.

It has taken me a year to get back to where I am today. It has taken medication (which wasn't right to start with). It has taken therapy - not sure how much this helped TBH. It has taken support from friends. But do you know what I value the most. The support from these threads. The hand holding. The knowing I am not a freak for avoiding the shower for 2 weeks. The encouragement and congratulations when I managed to brush my hair.

I don't post much any more as I am soooooo unbelievably busy. But I do lurk. I do still feel fragile and you are my security blanket. I may be back one day. I kind of hope not IYSWIM; but equally I hope that I will find the time to come back more often and offer the support, understanding and encouragement that has kept me going.

Ur right NN about being in hospital if u need it. Trouble is I don't agree this time. All the previous times I have agreed but I think this time my voices are making it harder.

Edwina! Now that is an inspirational message.

It's brought hope into my morning.

Ed - thats a lovely message and yes, this thread is what keeps me going. I have had a really crap year, it all started about this time last year when i stupidly took on a job teaching at college, despite knowing the reputation the place had, i'm still not back on my feet, but i am getting there. I am not putting myself under the pressure of looking for work but i do worry that i am blocking it off completely. There was talk of me going back and doing some spider work again but my friend hasn't been in touch and i think he is too busy at the moment. I still get job sites email me but i delete the emails. I am now the secretary of the PFA and im enjoying getting involved although am starting to see how its a select few that roll their sleves up and get on with the work while the others are only dong it for the kudos, which i find a bit odd, but hey ho - maybe it will look good on my CV.

I got my knitting out yesterday and there is a half knitted jumper that i am making for DD and a scarf of sorts that she is "knitting" which is nice, both of us sitting there knitting, its about the only time she sits still.

I feel content, mumsy, if that makes sense but constantly waiting for the bubble to burst. I spend so much time not doing things for fear of them going wrong - even if its soemthing simple like the knitting, thats why it has sat in the bag for three months becausse i have to join in a new colour and im scared So Ed you really are an inspiration, you and vicar (well and everyone else actually) you have all overcome so much and i often wonder if don't just need a kick up my backside to stop feeling sorry for myself and doing something with my life again.

LEM - I know exactly what you mean about feeling mummy. When it happens I think "ahh this is what it's supposed to be about,", then feel upset I don't feel like it all the time, then feel jealous of those that do.

Was reading something about people with anxiety and the strong link with procrastination. Apparently we don't like doing things in case it's not perfect. Have you got anxiety or am I just presuming?!

• mumsy

Are any of you lot religious/spiritual?

I have a real strong hunch if I could find some spiritual direction it would help me immensely as existential angst seems to underpin all of my other anxieties (of which there's a lot).

I'm back at work tomorrow for the first time since having DD (7.5mo) on direction of my psychiatrist who said I needed to get back to work ASAP.

Considering I felt like I was losing it on a trip to the garden centre with DCs yesterday I'm really hoping I can dig deep and hold it together tomorrow.

I really want to be okay as I've been utterly miserable being at home with the DCs and I want to get better for me but also off my family.

I don't want to fall apart at work, get signed off and then drop to the bottom again. I hope the psychiatrist is right and it's not going to push me over the infamous edge.

Anyone with experience of this? Before my MH probs I loved work.

Sorry for all the questions and posts. I'm so happy to find like minded women.

Milkhell - yes i suffer from anxiety, it stops me doing most things :( and i am the queen of procrastinators, and it is totally because i am scared of it not being good enough - simple things, im getting better but it has cost me my career :( I know its down to confidence, my friends are kind and tell me i can do it but i just discount it totally. Its been too long now and right now, mumsy is what im happy with - ironically its all i ever wanted as a teenager, to be a mum wiht a little family, I have everything i ever wanted - its not perfect, who's life doesn't have troubles but it never seems good enough, its good enough for me, but i always question it, think i need to be doing more.

i am a lapsed catholic, i had a bad experience with someone in religious authority (not from the catholic church) and it has taken that away from me so I can't really comment. I did find great comfort when i had PND and had just lost my dad, going to church and the "rituals" were comforting, am glad its "there" if you know what i mean, but it will never be the same for me now.

Hi Milk, I'm a Quaker and find them to be a great faith community to be part of - they are basically at the most liberal end of the christian tradition
(and not all Quakers would describe themselves as christians) Meetings are based on silence which makes them very peaceful and restful - I've just got back from one this morning. Quakers are open to inspiration from other faith traditions too, and I've taken many things from both Buddhism (Pema Chodron is a great writer on this eg, "Start where you are" - a great title in itself) and from liberal Judaism (where I am a massive fan of the wonderfully warm and wise, as well as amusing, Lionel Blue)
You can find out more about Quakers on the website quaker.org.uk
Personally I feel I need a spiritual home, and some inspiration on life's journey - though some find there's inspiration to be found all around us and I wouldn't argue with that either