Bipolar support thread?

[Crawling]

Ive noticed there are quite a few of us and thought maybe a thread for us would be good. All are welcome those diagnosed and those awaiting diagnosis.

Ill start with Ive been depressed so long now I dont remember how I used to feel, yet id still prefer this to mania as the havoc I reaked last time was very painful to clean up after my episode. If I had to chart my mood today between 1-10 1 being I cant think how to make a cup of tea and 5 being good 10 being the tv is talking to me and I must go out now im about a 3 today what about you guys?

Domestic I hope you get some inspiration and get your writing done. Can I ask have you tried the older anti pysch? The reason I ask is they work different to the new ones and mught work better in your case.

Haloperidol for e.g is a typical anti pysch and works different to the newer a typical anti pyschs.

The side effects are worse but if they work then its gotta be better than suffering this illness.

Domestiic;have you tried lithium? That is the only one which helped me.

I haven't tried lithium yet resurrection. No one ever suggested it to me. Does it have bad side effects?

I can't use lithium :( I'm not allowed to try because I've got kidney issues and it's so hard on the kidneys/thyroid. Everyone keeps telling me it's the gold standard for BP :(

really- funny then that no one tried to put me on it ever. I've only been given the anticonvulsants. Carbamazepine and lamotrigine. No idea if they did any good or not. When came off carbamazepine I felt no different just a bit less sedated!!

Sleeping 9/10 hours regularly and always exhausted in the morning...

Just catching up with the thread.

I'm an awful mother when I'm ill, and not that great when well. DH is much better with the DCs than I am. Well I suppose that's not entirely true, when I was of on maternity leave I did loads of stuff with them. The problem is that I've been ill for so long now I've forgotten what it is like to be truly well. If DH and I ever split up, I don't think he'd be an arse. He's been through it before and did the right things then, but who knows. I've put him through hell this last year.

I'm lucky DH has been supportive, but my last bout of psychotic depression over Xmas really pushed it.

I'm still under the care of the CCTT, and will be for a while as I've not managed more than 12 weeks of stability in the last year. I still have suicidal thoughts, mainly of jumping off bridges or under trains, but am in control of them now, whereas before it lead to me being detained under the MH act.

flat flat/ this is just shit. i don't expect anything from fridays apt. spych has anything else to say than just wait. there is not really any way out this.

babyheave:how fast did you come off your antispychotics? you might have caught this one: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tardive_psychosis.. what is CCTT?

Just to give you all hope for the future.My sister is Bi- Polar and went through a very bad spell about 6 yrs ago.ashe had a stay in a hospital and had various medication. When she left hospital to come home she ended her marriage of 25yrs and lived alone for quite a while.She then joined a choir which helped her a lot.A member of her choir introduced her to one of her friends.She is now remarried with 1yr old twin girls and is very very happy.Hang on in there ,there is life after Bi-Polar .good luck to you all.

Mummy - I'm glad your sister is okay...

Got to say that made me sob, though. I don't want a life after bi-polar. I want a life now. I don't want to have to explain why I can't use the telephone, why I couldn't let the postman in today, why I can't sleep and am having graphic nightmares about people breaking in. I don't want to take loads of medications and report to someone who decides if I can drive, I don't want to spin through a week's worth of emotions in a day.

I want stability, and normality, and a family. And I want somewhere where I truly belong and feel at home.

CajaDeLaMemoria: I think now they like to describe quetapine.

big hug to you Caja. You have a real stressful event to deal with, bipolar or not that would knock anyone.

God knows I understand about the emotional wheel spin.. my boyfriend just skyped me from italy and I had that weird high feeling again although our relationship is unstable and often makes me worse.

I did manage to let the postman in Caja but it always gives me palpitations!!! If I'd been broken into god knows if I'd manage it. So hats off to you for sticking with it all.

this might make some of you laugh: the closest I've got to a break in was when I left the car unlocked and someone stole the satnav. At the same time I couldn't find the car keys so I became convinced someone had stolen them, as I had a history of leaving the front door open as well :/ I called landlord to change locks (he loved that...), watched car like a hawk, couldn't sleep etc etc. They turned up later (my son found them) after I'd created a massive drama :/

God knows caja if anyone ACTUALLY broke into my house I'd be an utter wreck...

I cant do this im such a crap rubbish mum. I just cant deal anymore. I want to escape my life run away I need a break. Theres so much stress and I am so close to losing it with dd stupid twatty Portage worker. I just cant do it anymore.

I so so want to cut to release some pent up emotion but im trying hard not to I just need to wait 30 minutes then dp will be home and then I cant as he will stop me. I keep trying to distract myself but I cant im fat and ugly and useless waste of space I dont have any friends because people dont like me.

i don't have any friends either. we moved to this town and i haven't been able to make any friends because i am most of the time depressed. the rare times i am ok i start to make friends but then it dries up as i can't anymore meet them. i ahve also made some enemies....

it seems quite a few of us is having a crap day.

Mirage thats the same here and my only friend decided to sleep with me on my last manic episode meaning he is a friend no more.

I also dress scruffy and wear no make up dont bother with my appearance when depressed even on a minor depressive day as I lack energy and motivation to make a effort. This means I then feel too self conscious to take to people. Anyone else do this?

i have been scruffy last two monts. some weeks i only went out to walk my dc to playgroup. another day i saw another woman at the school who looked like a mental patient. scruffy and no emotion in her face.

a mental health patient

Perhaps it was me mirage I hate going out particularly the school wish I could hibernate.

yes, must be,. I just hope I don't look as sad as you :)

Hi sorry for just jumping in, I have seen that PTSD is closely related to bi-polar and wondered if anyone had a view on something I experienced. I have always wondered if was bi-polar, having quite manic episodes (spending crazy money without thinking and a few embarrassing outbursts) followed by very low and anxious episodes.

I had some counselling last year and started having nightmares and being very jumpy, everything on the PTSD list tbh. Easily startled, avoid going out (always have)

I was started on Prozac which I have taken before during low moods, and they send my mind quite wild, I couldn't sleep at all and was doing very strange things such as googling why Scottish people use certain words and wanting to know how started Scottish slang I done a few other strange things and my brother who is manic depressive actually asked me to leave his house as I was 'freaking him out'.

I am more balanced now, for someone with a stress disorder anyway. I just wondered what your thoughts were on me having bipolar? I could be overthinking this. (Another delight of PTSD)

I could be way off mark here but my Therapist who is giving me CBT had to google PTSD so I feel a bit alone with this.

Thanks

Overlyyappy your post has got a few red flags I was misdiagnosed at 15 during a depressive episode with PTSD my pyschosis being mistaken for flash backs and anxiety over things plus guilt making people talk to me. Ob no one here can diagnose you but if I were you I would speak to your gp and describe any up (hypo or manic) symptoms you have as these are very important. HTH.

Thank you. I see my counseller and GP tomorrow (eek out 2 times) so will talk with both of them about this.

I cannot say I have flashbacks, I do sometimes think of things but was with the STBXH for 16 years so would think this fairly normal. I will have a chat tomorrow and see. I did something online and scored as being manic. I would just like to get a diagnoses, treated and better ASAP, if possible.

A lot of your posts are very much how I feel.

Wish you all well as whatever this is it it is very crippling (cannot think of appropriate word)

Thank you very much. As you can see I am hyper.

Hello all, I'm bipolar 2. Mood good/stable. On 300mg of lamotrigine only but seems to work. Last manic episode was spring - summer, so I'm expecting one soon. Have been down since September before I reached therapeutic level of 300mg (for me) - seems like I need loads of the stuff.