Bipolar support thread?

[Crawling]

Ive noticed there are quite a few of us and thought maybe a thread for us would be good. All are welcome those diagnosed and those awaiting diagnosis.

Ill start with Ive been depressed so long now I dont remember how I used to feel, yet id still prefer this to mania as the havoc I reaked last time was very painful to clean up after my episode. If I had to chart my mood today between 1-10 1 being I cant think how to make a cup of tea and 5 being good 10 being the tv is talking to me and I must go out now im about a 3 today what about you guys?

That's a really cute idea Crawling :) I will definately do that. I was just thinking of a journal too that I could fill with writing so that I actually follow some of my own advice. So I can put that in the box too.

I've just asked my CPN to bring my appointment forward with my consultant. I explained I'm not happy on quetiapine, that I'd rather not take any meds and can she tell him I would prefer to try lamotrigine. This was on the phone, I will see her on Friday.

I'm not happy with my consultant as you know. He's not very proactive. I had to tell him 'how about the normal quetiapine' which I've been on for a couple of months. Last year I had an appointment with the perinatal team in which they confirmed that the quetiapine I was taking then was suitable for pregnancy. I feel that my consultant has taken their recommendations on meds as the 'bible' when all they were doing was confirming with me what I was already taking.

I'm nervous that he will still stall with the meds thing. My CPN was wondering if it's just that I'm depressed grrr No I'm frustrated to be left on quetiapine all this time.

How is everyone doing now?

I'm OKish, but finding work very hard going and I am absolutely exhausted and being really grouchy with DH and the DCs.

Saw my care-co this morning and did a relapse plan. I was quite good at identifying when I was getting depressed, but had no idea what my signals were for when I was going manic. Not one.

Can anyone else recognise when they're going manic, or does it take someone else to point it out?

I know the signs but I wouldnt be able to say im going manic I need help IYSWIM. I would just laugh at the suggestion to be honest as I dont feel ill even if I did realise I probably wouldnt care.

That was what I said to her. I've always identified being manic as being well. I did say in my meeting that I could do with a short manic period to get on with work and get the house tidy. Her response was something along the lines of Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

I can recognise when I'm going manic but it doesn't really help. It's like a wave and will progress not much I can do about it.

I have a emergency meds kit that I asked for which has sleeping pills and tranquilisers. So hopefully If I can medicate myself sooner I won't get so ill

I'm really, really not coping with work. I've already been close to tears twice so far this morning and I've only been in an hour. I've managed to hold it together, but the voices are back telling me to jump off stuff and while I'm totally in control of it, its making work difficult. I've already taken some PRN to keep me going.

I don't know what to do for the best. I need to be paid as I've already borrowed mortgage payments this year and I can't keep on taking if I'm not sure if I can pay back. If I take more time off I know they will competency me. Either that or another restructure is being mooted and I would expect my job to disappear in a restructure. It just all feels so bleak.

Babyheave that must be tough try to hang in there its been so long since I have worked that I dont remember how hard it is really. Just try to take it one day at a time. Perhaps treat yourself this weekend specially as its mothers day. Maybe relax let someone else do the cleaning while you have a relaxing bath.

I find it easier when doing something hard to see every little achievement as a good achievement. Count each thing on a list and give yourself a reward each day for getting through it until you feel better.

Hi guys- I would be so grateful for some help- I'm Bipolar type 2 - on 400mg slow release of quetiapine and 150mg of sertraline and four weeks pregnant. I suffered a miscarriage in December and am worried about it happening again- has anyone been on this medication?

Mummyamy86

Hi just passing and had to comment. Yes I have been on the slow release quetiapine 400mg. It's so sedating and was making me miserable so I asked to be put on the normal release one. I'm on 400 mg and find myself taking 200mg normal release and still finding it too sedating and hard to keep myself in a good routine. I've been trying to stay on quetiapine this past year as I am trying to conceive. The consultant seems to think it's the only med that I can be on. So I've been struggling and getting depressed cos of it.

I'm sorry you have been through the heartache of a miscarraige so recently but I am so happy that your pregnant again. For me it's important to stay well and be on meds. I would perservere and stay on meds too if that feels right to you.

I have discovered since looking on Dr Hale's infant risk forums that there are three possible meds for pregnancy and breast feeding quetiapine, olanzapine and lamotrigine.

www.infantrisk.com/forum/showthread.php?67-Is-anyone-here

I have suffered with sedation and weight gain so I will be asking my consultant about going on to lamotrigine.

I feel reassured by going on the infant risk forums and also make sure you are getting the support of a perinatal team.

My heart goes out to you and I wish you all the best

Mummyamy86

Hi just passing and had to comment. Yes I have been on the slow release quetiapine 400mg. It's so sedating and was making me miserable so I asked to be put on the normal release one. I'm on 400 mg and find myself taking 200mg normal release and still finding it too sedating and hard to keep myself in a good routine. I've been trying to stay on quetiapine this past year as I am trying to conceive. The consultant seems to think it's the only med that I can be on. So I've been struggling and getting depressed cos of it.

I'm sorry you have been through the heartache of a miscarraige so recently but I am so happy that your pregnant again. For me it's important to stay well and be on meds. I would perservere and stay on meds too if that feels right to you.

I have discovered since looking on Dr Hale's infant risk forums that there are three possible meds for pregnancy and breast feeding quetiapine, olanzapine and lamotrigine.

www.infantrisk.com/forum/showthread.php?67-Is-anyone-here

I have suffered with sedation and weight gain so I will be asking my consultant about going on to lamotrigine.

I feel reassured by going on the infant risk forums and also make sure you are getting the support of a perinatal team.

My heart goes out to you and I wish you all the best

sorry for double post, trying to post link

Great the chemist cant get hold of one of my meds and ive run out. So now I need to wait till my pychiatrit can either prescribe a higher dose as they have that or a different one.

Thats no use is it Crawling. Is there another chemist you could go to instead?

This weekend has not been relaxing. I've spent most of today trying not to cry, which wasn't helped by DS having a full blown ASD meltdown in front of around 500 children and adults at a gym display.

I have work tomorrow and the thought of it makes me feel sick. Until DH gets another job, I don't see what choice I have.

I hate ASD meltdowns you have my sympathy its hard and people make it worse by staring giving dirty looks. I hope your dp finds a job soon Babyheave it must be adding to your stress being the sole provider atm and we all know stress and Bipolar dont mix.

I cant go to a different chemist as the pharmacist said it was a problem with the company and everyone had failed to get this particular med delievered.

Nightmare re meds. Not good at all.

DS hasn't been good recently. Thats the second major meltdown over the last few days. The other one happened in the playground at pick up time and DH had the pleasure of dealing with all of the looks. He had to pick him up and carry him to the car that time. I've tried to find out if there is a problem, but I think it comes down to there being changes in his routine. Me working again and DH out of work means that his daily routine has changed - only a tiny pit, but that seems to be enough to set him off.

It's been a bit quiet on here. How is everyone doing?

I'm having a day off work to chill out and relax. Yesterday wasn't too bad. I managed to be reasonably productive, caught up with some colleagues and came out feeling like I'd actually achieved something. I hope I can keep it up.

How about you?

Hi babyheave IM doing good sorted my prescript ion out he doubled my dose and I've.managed to get back to exercise as my foot is better. Glad your having a day off today.

How is everyone?

Work is going ok and I'm on a bit of an up a at the moment which helps a lot with work. I see my psych on Friday so can ask about changing my meds. I've already done a small change in that I've swapped the slow release for normal and I'm not feeling so wiped out during the day. I'll see what they say about it, but hope they'll be reasonable.

Good that you've got back into exercise Crawling. Do you find out helps a lot with your mood?

Hi everyone, I'm 5 weeks pregnant after a mc last December. I'm bipolar 2 and on 300mg quetiapine slow release and 150mg sertraline. I'm worried about my medication and the effects on my baby. My psych and dr are more concerned about my health although I have been stable for a year and aren't helpful at putting My mind at rest- is anyone else on this medication or know more about it? I am desperate and would love if anyone could help me x

Welcome mummy I decided to go med free during PG so can't help with that sorry I do take anti pysch while BF with no I'll effect though.

Babyheave good luck with tomorrow hope he listens. I find every day I dread going on my x trainer and spent 2 hours pushing myself before I go on it but once I do it really raises my mood it's well worth the investment it helps keep the eating side effect of my meds down too as it distracts me.

Babyheave how did your meeting with pych go?

Im meeting mine today and hoping he will up my doses not hopeful though as I am still breastfeeding.

The meeting with the psych went OK. He wants to put me on lithium rather than deal with addressing the side effects of such a large dose of quetiapine. I told him to get bent that it wasn't something I'd consider.

Quetiapine and Lamotrigine (when I take them!) work well for me. I see no need to swap onto something else. He agreed in the end that I would reduce the Q from 600mg to 450mg, but up the lamotrigine to 250 a day. This is fine by me as I find Lamotrigine pretty much side effect free.

I've got some 25mgs of quetiapine to take if my mood starts going awry and a whopping 4 x 2mg of diazepam for a 28 day script. Ooh Mr Psychiatrist, you are really spoiling me.

Work. Well work is OK. I'm not dead and haven't killed anyone. I've even managed to get some management level work done. I'd love to have just an teeny tiny hypomania to get on with things a wee bit faster, but knowing my luck I'll just end up suicidal and depressed.

Im glad it went well for you I didnt go so well he said he has only just doubled one of my meds but try taking them earlier and if its not working in two months he will up.

Glad to hear work is going well.

Im feeling a bit up when should I tell someone. I want to go out and get drunk, I keep fantasing about having affairs and feel a desire to be single. I feel trapped and im doing more exercise I feel my looks are more imporatant. My sleep and sex drive are fine atm. If I am up its early stages as there is only a mild feeling. I dont want to say anything yet as I dont want to worry anyone in case im wrong and this just stems from being stuck in for two years. plus I dont want to be stopped from going out because I really need a break.

But at the same time I dont want to leave it too late or I will not want help.