feeling very low

[sodown]

Do you ever reach a point where you think if it wasn't for the kids there really wouldn't be aby reason to carry on

yes [short and to the point]

well in the past anyway have now learnt to ride the waves...i will explain..............................if you stood on a beach and walked into the sea and tried to fight against the waves you wouldnt get anywhere,,if you relax and ride the waves its a lot easier...iykwim

you ok??

yeah i do know what you mean!! think thats part of my problem sometimes. instead of just relaxing and going with the flow i'm always thinking about how my life could be better. i'm on my own with my kids and have friends and a little job so i keep busy but i just feel like i've had enough of the same old crap every day. just went upstairs to hoover the bedrooms and ended up sat on the floor sobbing!!!

oh hun...((((hugs}}}} i honestly know how you are feeling ..its like life is going past at 100 mile an hour and you cant get on the ride.
how old are your children?

5 and 7 and believe me i wouldn't be without them for the whole world. I do feel like life is passing me by. all my friends are married and they're always off doing things like families do. I know i should be all modern but i'm so tired of being on my own, i long for there to be somebody else to take the strain for a while. somebody to love me. i am emtionally drained. i just can't help thinking what if this is it. what if this is all i do for ever. i have never felt so alone in my life.

not all people that have a partner have support love etc [sometimes they may look happy on th eoutside but they are not]
you need to start doing things for you even if its a bubbly bath when the children are in bed..please dont think that someone else will make you 100%happy ,you need to do it yourself..i spent ages thinking if this change id be hppy if that wasnt there id be happy etc,,you cant go on waiting to be happy ,,i know how difficult it is but try this...when you wake up in the morning before you get up say this is going to be a good day a couple of times over in your head,then if poss get washed make up etc before you need to rush out [will make you feel 100%better] try not to get paranoid about the house work and spend time playing with the kids i spent too much time dusting things upstairs and making sure all clothes were hung the same way round etc [who the hell is going to look] make cakes with the kids today ,choose a thing everyday to do with them i promise it cheers you up ,,my dd age 8 was poorly monday/tuesday and she sat sticking glitter to paper ..loads of which ended up on table and floor ,in the past i would have ended up in tears because of the mess ,but when she had finished it was a certifiate for me!! which is now on the fridge dor still dripping glitter!

also even if you feel like you could punch a wall try to smile at people you will always [well nearly ]get a smile back if you give off neg vibes ,,like you dont care and you dont like you ,who else will? honest it will get better...

I know everything you say is right. I know my happiness needs to come from me and not from a man but i just don't know how to get there. I'm so good at putting on the mask and smiling at everybody, pretending that everythings ok. I'm the mum at school who always has my hair done and makeup on and from the outside people would probabley think that i am this happy confident person. Nobody sees what goes on in my head. I can't get past this feeling of having a great empty void in my life, i don't know how to fill it. I feel broken, like the old me is dead. i feel so lost in my life. i don't want to be like this because above anything i want my children to be happy and i desperately want to be a good mummy, sorry for ranting

you are not ranting! when i ended up nearly being taken to hospital i was so bad ,,i ended up telling a couple of people and i got oh you cant feel like that you always look happy etc ,,i said im like a swan all serine and floating alon but underneath my legs are going like the clappers ..have you told your dr how you feel? at the mo i am using a homeapathic remacy [from boots] called"ignatia" great stuff ! well works for me ....you are very welcome to cat me anytime if you want to rant or if you just need someone to talk to

and you are a good mummy loo what your doing for them your being a family! and working your a star!

i watched a dvd last night [it was crap!!] but it had someoone say .." your mind can make heaven a hell and hell a heaven" so true ,,how many people would dearly love to swap places with you? to have 2 children that love them and friends ..i know this dosent make you feel any better but its true.

you ok?

IM GLAD TO HEAR ITS NOT JUST ME THAT FEELS LIKE THAT IF IT WERNT FOR MY KIDS I DNT THINK ID BE HERE NOW

sorry A-A-angel, went and had a bit of a lie down, try and calm myself down a bit. sorry to hear that you're feeling low too tanya.
I think that i defo have to do something about my life. or maybe its not a case of doing something, maybe i need to accept and be glad for what i have and concentrate on those things. I know i'm so lucky to have my kids. some people have nobody and i can't imagine what gets them through the day. If i didn't hav my kids i don't reckon i would get out of bed at all. But i have got them and for that i am grateful. i just need to shake off this dark cloud that seems to be following me around. whats happening with you Tanya hun?

all I can add is, your children won't always be so draining as young kids are - nothing stays the same, and even if you don't get a man anytime soon, you WILL one day get more time to yourself, and feel more yourself again.

Go easy on yourself - being a single parent is the most exhausting and draining job that there is on this earth - I mean it!

Good luck xx