why am i so down

[fostermum]

im off to live in new zealand in six weeks back home, new life ,new job, new friends , but today i feel so low and tearful,ive taken my AD's so its not that, i just want to climb in bed and cry

it sounds as though although there are a lot of things to look forward to, you need to grieve for what it is you are leaving behind. your friends here, your job here, etc. perhaps you just need to do what you need to do to come to terms with the grief of that.
i did a little geographic move when my dd was 16 months and had to leave behind lots of friends who had been an absolute godsend when dd was born. i don't know how i would have managed without them. when i moved, although i was excited about my new life, i did just have to give myself some time to come to terms with leaving them. it was hard, but better to do it at the time rather than keep it all bottled up for it to come back much later.
good luck

maby thats what it is, i just feel so totally alone all of a sudden even though my youngest daughter and her partner and son are coming too