emmatom, no I haven't told him to leave before, before my Grandad died he was kind and considerate, it seems like he has undergone a complete personality change just when I neded hm most.
I'm not really in a position to cope financially on my own but I will cope somehow I'm sure. I'm usually such a strong person and I will cope with anything life throws at me.
Losing my Grandad is hard, he was ill for a long time and I know he was ready to go, it was the best thing really because he was suffering. I guess the past few months are 'catching up' with me, I tried so hard to stay positive and up beat for him when deep down all I wanted to do was scream at God "its not fair, why are you letting him suffer like this?"
My Grandparents were the only people in my family who cared about me, my childhood was shall we say less than happy, my father was abusive to the point that I was stabbed by him on two seperate occasions and I suffered a brain injury from him throwing me against a wall which resulted in mild epilepsy (the good thing being I haven't had a fit for years). My mother was and still is cold and self absorbed (infact that description of her is being very kind), I left home on my 16th birthday.
Sorry I'm rambling, I just wanted to make the point that my grandparents home was my only refuge and as my Nan died a few years ago and now I have lost Grandad I feel so alone.
The funeral service was lovely, a fitting tribute, but dealing with my family was awful, I had to sit and listen as my mother was proudly telling distant cousins that she is a great- grandmother when she has shown no interest in them whatsoever (not that I or my dd would let her anywhere near them), she even put dgs's life at risk even befroe he was born. My older brother has hemaphelia, which means that dd, myself and my mother could be carriers. When dd found out she was expecting a boy the question of hemaphelia arose. The hospital tested dd but the results bame back inconclusive so they tesed me, same result. They asked me if I could talk to my brother to find out the details of his condition but as my mother threw him out when he was 16 and I hadn't seen him for years, I didn't have a clue where he was.
The GP got in touch with my mother to try to find out and she told him that my brother didn't have hemaphelia and I was lying, she then wrote a very nasty letter to my pregnant dd 'congratulating her on the origional way she had found on informing her that she was going to be a great grandmother', we did not ask the GP to do it and FFS she had never shown any interest in my dd anyway. The GP didn't believe her and did his own 'digging' and he found out the my brother did indeed have hemaphelia therefore she had put my dgs at risk, they had to take extra precautions during the birth because of the risk of him bleeding out and test him as soon as he was born. Fortunately he didn't have it and it all was ok, but it could have been so different if the GP had taken my mothers word for it and he did have it.
I'm rambling again, but I've got to get it all out, even if no-one listens.