IF, 4:3, 5:2 - Maintaining a healthy weight - Chapter 2

[Breadandwine]

This thread is for those who have been practicing IF (Intermittent Fasting) for quite a while and are now at or nearing their target healthy weight. It's also for anyone who is doing it for the health benefits alone.

How do we experience fasts and balance a stable food intake while having little or no weight to lose?

How do we ensure that this WOL keeps us at the healthy weight long term rather than revert to yoyo games?

Several of us have been stable at our goal weight for a few months, now, and others are joining all the time. Obviously, the more the merrier!

Here is the current main thread for posters practicing IF to lose weight.

There are two other associated threads:
This one, which is an absolute goldmine of Tips and Links on how to practice IF, and the research behind it.

And here is a treasure trove of 5:2 recipes, mostly low calorie for fasting days, but there are also recipes for when you want to treat yourself. And, now we're maintaining, we'll need more of these!

anglaise hugs

awful for you, that must be so shocking, not that i'm advocating turning to alcohol and food for solace, but actually theres a lot of useful empty calories that alongside some good friends might help you through.

take care.

((((Anglaise)))))
Is it a deal breaker for you or is it something he and you can compartmentalise?
Then again if he's on FB with her he being rather a twonk.
Hold your head high. The issue is clearly with him not you.

Alan Clark's wife, when asked about his philandering said "4 days a week of him is enough for anybody". It seems odd to those in our generation, but I suspect is more common than many admit.

TIP he is coming over tonight so I'll let you know. He says he loves me deeply and his flirtation was due to problems in his business and uncertainty about his future. He says he finished it last week but I'm not sure and would like proof...and I'm not going to be a pushover, even though I love him. If he wants to make a new start as he says he does, I need more reassurance that it won't happen again. I've never been in this situation so wish me luck. He is certainly living up to the stereotype of French men

Oh great, he thinks if it was OK for Francois Mitterand its OK for him.
Threaten to cut them off and put them in a jar!
But more to the point, try to get him to explain why.
Remember that many, many men can separate sex from emotion - that is why there is a 'call girl' industry.
The main thing is stay calm and come and rant at us rather than scoffing food you'll regret

Anglaise1 I agree with TiP, don't let this ruin all your good work. Maybe you can work it out, I did with then BF who is now DH and our relationship is better than ever (was 13 years ago).
I know it feels like a kick in the teeth but hang in there, you can be strong.

Thankyou both so much TIP and virginposter . I was starting to think I was being such a wimp in wanting to give him a second chance. It is so nice to be able to talk about this. I can't talk to friends and family as they all think he is wonderful and if it does work out positively I don't want them to have a bad impression of him.
Yes, men can easily separate sex from emotion. I am taking that into account;) Sorry for the massive thread creep!

Not thread creep really.

Part of the issue with maintaining a healthy weight is about finding ways to manage stress and hassle without returning to comfort eating and all of that.
Same as MOCNK knows that she can rant about her house safe in the knowledge that the page will roll over.

All the best Anglaise. I'm another one who believes in the compartmentalising theory.

And remember to separate out this issue with your BF from your weightloss. Don't let it affect your eating habits.

Anglaise [hug]

Hope you can work it out!

Anglaise i won't give you my opinion on you problem as i don't know you at all but i do want to say one thing.

Remember who you are and what you are worth because you are so worth it.

Hi Anglaise finishing it 'last week' but then leaving his FB page opens doesn't seem too clever , but I suppose i can only say that if you do give him the benefit of the doubt , only do it once.. My first husband was a serial 'returner' and I was a serial 'forgiver'.. and of course he just kept on doing it finally leaving when my son (his) was 2 weeks old..
Anyway , dont let it ruin all your hard work , and I hope that it turns out in the right way for you , however that is,, .. ( and if its the end , it might just turn out to be the right way for you as it was with my ex).

Yes this thread is great for support off topic or not , and it is great that everyone is so supportive in helping everyone else maintain our gains (or losses) while we still live our lives good or bad .

I am being a utterly carp faster at the moment .

Lots of stressy stuff going on with me also , but so far I'm staying within 2-5lbs of my maintenance weight of 10st , but have been hitting the rather .but not pigging out.. I tend to eat less with stress.

Today was super-difficult as had to go through yet another 'job re-evaluation' (public sector cuts) with my manager .where she made me got through my job description (it already has 29 'essential 'points!) and has to submit a written report of what it was I do to match all of them , (as well has any more I may be doing - lots as I'm also doing my ex bosses job) and then itemise the 10 most important aspects of my role in order with reasons. The last time this happened they downgraded me two grades.. This time if they do I think ill walk and sod it despite the fact ill probably not be able to find another .. I'm already so over qualified for the job as it is.. (far more than the boss in fact ) .

Tomorrow I'm hoping will not be stressy but it might, as I have taken the day off to go and see my sons ex-girlfriend and my 6mth grandson, i've not seen them since the naming day (an upsetting and humiliating event where we all got snubbed if any of you remember) and her moving in with her new BF , , but am hoping it will be ok as she has okd it for me to go . i hope she will be friendly.... ill be driving up to Aldershot for this , then staying o/n in Watford then on to a meeting ion Friday getting back late , so probably wont be back on here until Sunday )

Hope everyone is doing well, especially ATB if you are popping in
, you are going to be so fit!

MOCNK* does this mean you have lost the Wirral house also ? Hope not

hello everyone else

MOCNK you have to tick 'the make my photos public' box in your profile , if you want us to see them

B&W just caught up with the umbilical cord and reindeer poo! very good.. Kids are so amazing .. I hope one day I will have the chance bake with my grandson ..

I have a load of Thomas the tank engine books and duvet set and cushions etc to take to give him which i bought from someone at work , OK.. he's a bit young yet , but every kid i've met loves Thomas!

Hello all, don't post often but wanted to offer hugs and off thread support to all of you with stuff happening at the moment. And also to say well done ATB fantastic! We've just got back from holiday and I put on about 5lb which I'm hoping to shift over the next few weeks, but we did enjoy a lot of lovely wine, pasta, pizza and chocolate that I have no regrets about because I know I've got the situation under control, with one fast under my belt since we've been back.

Laska hope the job situation improves...another public sector worker here but it sounds like you have it much worse than me.

Well done northstar I bet you've lost most of that already. DP is already getting anxious about us undoing all our efforts in holiday, I think he'll be dragging me to the gym more often than I would like!

MOCNK I'm a Blackberry user too, but have a Fitbit One which I use with MFP on my iPod Touch or just on my laptop. I'm not at all bothered about it working with my phone.

Sat here eating peanut M&Ms - I love 5:2!

Laska I do hope it goes well tomorrow - I'll be thinking of you!

Don't forget to take loads of photo's - as if you would!

Then you can show us!

My wife has my daughter's latest scan (20 weeks) framed, on a side table!

hugs to Anglaise (what is it with French men!) and good luck to Laska tomorrow.

Fasting today, but just had a sneaky look at the scale and I am at my lowest ever weight, despite eating more cheesecake in one week than is healthy. I've caught some sort of virus off the kids, sore throat a bit dizzy, headache. I'm not hungry but if I am later I may scrap the fast. I've got to work unfortunately and it is a physical day today. Coffee and paracetamol are required.

Sorry that tomorrow should be today, I just realised the posts were yesterday (bit slow this morning).

Hi all,
OH came over last night and we talked again...we both want to give it a chance. We don't live with each other and I have 2 children (6 and 12), we live 25kms from each other and he comes to my house more. If he didn't care for me I don't see why he would bother...plus all his friends and family think I'm great and he wouldn't have bothered involving me in his life to such an extent if he really couldn't care less. The problem is that the only proof I have that he has kept to his word is by checking his phone and he specifically left that in the car last night. He said if I don't trust him then it won't work, but my point is how do I know I can trust him without proof (like looking at his phone or emails)? Has anyone got any advice on this? He is goodlooking and charming and easy to believe and deep down I'm still wary about taking a risk as if he betrays me again it will destroy me. I look after my children on my own (I have no family here in France), they rarely see their dad as he is in the UK so I'm in quite a fragile position. To make matters worse, I also discovered that he had started seeing an ex girlfriend again - he told me he had seen her once to talk over their painful past history but that was it. Then I saw the text messages (always her contacting him to be fair) and as she is in a messed up state he has seen her a few times. He swears it is platonic and in the text messages there was certainly no intimacy. He has promised he will tell her he won't see her again as they have nothing more to say to each other. The problem for me is that I know he was deeply hurt when she finished the relationship and I can't shake the idea that he isn't over her even though he says he is.
With both things that I found (granted by reading private things) in the space of 2 days I'm in such a mess. But I've never had so much fun, intimacy, affection with anyone before as I have with him. He is very good with my children too and they adore him.
Goodness, re-reading this I sound so pathetic, sorry! I'd lost weight again this morning

Good luck tomorrow Laska.

Anglaise no advice really except to start tuning into your instinct and gut reactions from now on. Try and enjoy your time with him but at the same time be vigilant. Easier said than done, I know... sorry.

Anglais only you know what your relationship is really like. If you both want to try and he is good to you and your kids and you are enjoying yourself then why not.
Imo, the only problem is the trust - you cannot try if you constantly distrust him and check his texts etc. From my experience, you have to forgive and forget until you again have reason to suspect. Are you someone who can stop snooping and accept him? Because if not, I can't see the relationship working. Distrust and jealousy destroy.
Why not give it a go wholeheartedly and enjoy being with him. If in the future you have proof that he's at it again then you must re-assess.
Hope this helps.

good luck laska with seeing your grandson, I hope you enjoy your day.

I have also lost the wirral house too, as they are back on teh market, just have to hope I find another buyer.

thanks for the photo settings tip also, think i have now made my photo's public....boy, for a techie, I'm really not too good at mumsnet settings....just me or are they really very clunky and unintuitive?

I failed another fast yesterday, but probably a lowish calorie day at about 1000 cals, I think it was the baking the banana bread that did it, but if I was properly back on track that wouldn't have been an issue.

anglaise wow sounds like a truly difficult situation to work your way through, and I really feel for you. my gut feeling is if I was in your OH's position, having been caught out, but wanting forgiveness, trust and to move forwards with you I would want to give you all teh reassurance and evidence that you understandably desire in order to put your mind at rest (i.e. the mobile phone) i agree with what others have said about their needing to be trust and that you need to be able to draw a line under it if it's going to be possible to move on, but from what you have said about him delibertely leaving the phone in the car, then I can understand why you still feel mistrustful. In my experience a lot of cheaters try and make out that it is the other persons fault for not trusting that causes teh issues, but they have to take responsibility for their actions in creating that situation. I guess it's all made so much harder when you have your children involved, to remove him from their lives when they have become attached would be difficult, but to continue to have him in when the same thing may happen again is also a risk. hugs I wish you luck in working through things. maybe some counselling together would be helpful?

mumofcrazynamedkids I know, I really want more reassurance but if I want to make this work then I need to have trust in him as I did before. Apart from the slight worry about his ex (which I don't have anymore as she has apparently been boring the pants off him on the times he has seen her) he was always very attentive and involved me in everything he does with friends and family. I'm sure he isn't a serial shagger, he deosn't have sex for the sake of it and only enjoys it in long term relationships and I'm sure the long distance one was never consumated, it was just a means of escape for him which got out of control.
If I don't think the best of him it will never work. He thought long and hard before getting involved with me precisely because I have young children (his are grown up) as he knew it wasn't the easy option.
BsshBossh I will give him the benefit of the doubt this time, but will remain vigilant.
virginposter you are right, I snooped and opened a Pandora's Box of things. Before I did this he had never really given me cause to doubt. Your comment has given me the kick up the bottom to stop feeling sorry for myself and give it another go with him, despite the lack of evidence (although he has deleted his FB page).

anglaise1
In the past it was possible for people to have "strands" to their lives.
Be they professional or hobby or personal.
Nowadays there is this obsession with total openness and trust
and a MASSIVE increase in relationship breakdown.

I trust DH, but I also accept that he's away a lot and always turns his phone off when working.
I've also seen women go weak at the knees near him before working out who I am.
I have never mixed my work and social life (other auditors are saddos unlike me)

You do not have to "trust him utterly" : you just have to know that you are the be all and end all of your time together and that he will tell you the truth about what he's doing, even if you have to forgive it.

That way security and enjoyment lies.
The other route leads to constant suspicion and distrust - and unhappy kids.

If you and the kids come to visit their dad (well you to be young free and single for those days), is it any of his business what arrangements to meet with friends you make?
And if he makes it his business - in a good way - you've hit the jackpot