Could someone let me know if I’m overthinking this or if I am justified in being a little annoyed.
I have wanted my DSs (7 and 5) to start music lessons for a while now and finally found a teacher in the next village who teaches drums guitar and piano and offered his last two 2x45 minute sessions to my children to have a bit of a music-introduction course before they settle into learning one instrument formally. I love the teacher’s approach and my kids were loving it.
I mentioned the teacher to a friend of mine who has 2 kids of the same age and she said she might speak to him to start her two in September.
A few weeks later she is sitting outside the cafe round the corner from his house when we turn up for our lesson and says ‘oh DS and DD are there having a joint lesson. I rang him and this was his last slot because someone else dropped out.’ Obviously no problem and I’m delighted for them.
Then music teacher says after my youngest’s lesson… ‘it would be great if friend’s DS could have the session to himself and DD went in with your DS2 and then your DS2 could have his session alone’. I didn’t mind so much as I thought it might help my youngest concentrate a bit as he gets distracted and can be a handful so I agreed. We put it to friend and she said ok.
Next week it’s all fine.
Following week my son is struggling with tiredness and the fact his father is leaving for work abroad for 2 months the next day and is a handful and distracts little girl and teacher mentioned it at end. Didn’t think much of it but spend week rooming him to be better behaved for next lesson.
Next week I turn up and friend is sitting at cafe again and says ‘oh DD is in with him. We’ve decided my DS should have 30 mins, then DD, then your DS2 and then your DS1 should have his 45 min session’. I was flustered and on my period and a bit spaced out so I just said ‘oh ok’ but then afterwards I’m going into the lesson to drop off my youngest and am about to mention it and teacher says ‘yes a much better situation for friends DD…. She was getting distracted by your son’. I was a bit gobsmacked that no one had asked me about the session or asked my opinion. I left DS2 there, switched in DS1 after his session and then went off to think about it. Today I get text from friend saying ‘I prefer DD to have 30 mins alone as she didn’t like it with your son, so we’ll leave it as it was this week from now on, ok?’
I’m a bit miffed to be honest. I found the guy, committed to 45 mins each. Primed my children to go. Then primed my DS to share his session and now have to prime him to go alone… And some how I’ve ended up losing 15 mins of one lesson to a friends child who I introduced to the teacher… he charges me less obviously for less time. It’s not the money really. Should I say something or just leave it. On the one hand my son gets a lesson to himself which I think I prefer. and perhaps 30mins is better for a child of 5? On the other I feel someone should have asked me. I feel a bit bulldozed. 