Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Brexit
Original poster

Do you judge people on how they voted?

347 replies

Rock4please · 01/08/2019 07:55

Just that really. I used to have an open mind on meeting somebody new but, if I discover that they voted leave, I am not interested in furthering the relationship. Similarly, with Americans, I don’t want to associate with anyone who supports Trump.

Am I being unfair and narrow minded or do you judge new people in a similar way?

OP posts:
DemocratleaveEU · 02/08/2019 17:07

@DorisDaysDadsDogsDead. I think it was an ego trip by Cameron. Nothing to do with the rest of the party. We did know that they were taking large amounts of money for “free trade” and taking credit for things they’d funded through our own money. It wasn’t a case of not knowing. We were given a choice

BuggersMuddle · 02/08/2019 17:07

In theory I don't have a problem with how people vote (unless it's something patently awful like BNP), but in practise it depends on the motivation behind it.

I'm not sure I actually am friends with any leave voters, but that's not intentional, but more a factor of my location, demographics and industry Smile

That said, I find ideologues hard work & have cooled friendships with people because of this. That includes e.g.:

  • People on the right who spout shite about immigrants and scroungers
  • People on the left who call Tory voters scum & liberally use words like 'TERF' and 'Nazi'

Basically if you're a good person who's well intentioned we have something to work with. If you're a screaming bigot who 'hates' the people with opposing (mainstream) view, we're probably not going to be able to have a conversation in good faith.

DorisDaysDadsDogsDead · 02/08/2019 17:14

"We did know that they were taking large amounts of money for “free trade” and taking credit for things they’d funded through our own money. It wasn’t a case of not knowing."

We did know they were taking relatively small amounts of money (circa 0.7% of total government spending) for free and unrestricted access to a market of 500 million relatively wealthy consumers, bringing in a quite stupendously large amount of wealth to the country, far out of proportion to the amount in cost.

The fact that the EU hating tax dodgers who own most of the papers, who don't want EU tax evasion laws imposed over here, only focused on the amount paid out, and not the wealth created thereby is frankly disgusting.

And the fact that they invested our money in impoverished regions that Westminster wouldn't have bothered about in a month of Sundays is actually something the EU should be proud of...

DustyDiamond · 02/08/2019 17:43

Am I being unfair and narrow minded or do you judge new people in a similar way?

Yes you are, and no I don't.

I couldn't give a toss how someone voted.

That said, if they're a crazed remainer who tantrums incessantly about Brexit I'll give them a wide berth - similarly a crazed brexiter who tantrums incessantly about Brexit would also be avoided.

I don't require my friends to subscribe to my political leanings & anyone who required me to subscribe to theirs would def not be on my friends list.

DemocratleaveEU · 02/08/2019 17:43

@doris it wasn’t free if we had to pay for it. Oh and thanks to junckers incompetence we now have 25% on all good imported from the USA while we remain members

ooooohbetty · 02/08/2019 17:50

If I knew someone who didn't like me because of how I voted I wouldn't be friends with them. It's incredibly sanctimonious to think that you know better than everyone else. I have friends who like trump, friends who don't. Friends who voted leave, friends who voted stay. We all respect each other's opinion as friends should.

whirlwinds · 02/08/2019 18:02

Quite like you OP I was far less judgemental before the Referendum and Trump. Have Leavers turned Remainers now in the family due to the shambles that became apparent around last year. Majority of the people I know in my area are leave voters, they like me as I like them BUT it is best we do not talk about Brexit they never win the debate as it were because facts are hard to counter

CardinalSin · 02/08/2019 19:08

@UndemocraticLeave Ah, Juncker all by himself. It's thanks to the French, in particular, that we didn't sign up to TTIP which would have allowed American corporations to sue our government for not selling them the NHS.

Doubletrouble99 · 02/08/2019 22:01

DorisDays - I hardly think what we have been paying into the EU is good value for money for a free trade deal with 500m people. We export £145m to the EU and £100m to the USA without a trade deal. Have paid them not a thing and even have a trade surplice with them.

Doubletrouble99 · 02/08/2019 22:04

I agree with the poster up thread about the Scottish indi ref. I have seen horrendous posts from SNP supporters. The vile anti English/Tory sentiment is appalling. The ironic thing is they don't think they are racist!!

reginafelangee · 02/08/2019 23:19

@InTheHeatofLisbon

Incidentally DP and I walked to the Indy ref polling station with our No voting neighbours, and we even went for lunch afterwards!

That's so nice. Unfortunately not my experience.

We were given panic alarms by the police and had to get cctv installed because of the threats and behaviours of our yes voting neighbours.

To this day they still write awful things about us on social media every time Nicola raises the prospect of another referendum.

Sadly I can recite many other stories ranging from unpleasantness through to vandalism and assault experiences by friends and family.

I'm sure there was ugliness on both sides. I can only speak from personal experience and that is sadly why I don't have many yes voting friends in my circle anymore because something ugly took them over.

Mintjulia · 03/08/2019 09:06

The answers of here are quite frightening.

What the majority of people appear to be saying is that they won’t tolerate a different point of view and don’t accept that people are entitled to their own opinions !

daisypond · 03/08/2019 09:11

People do accept that other people are entitled to their own opinions. But they don’t have to be friends with them or respect them for those opinions.

haverhill · 03/08/2019 09:20

I know lots of Leave voters. Some are in-laws, some colleagues. None of them are knuckle-dragging Britain First types. Most are well-qualified professionals. One is a keen amateur botanist and she chose Leave because she was appalled at how ancient flower meadows in (I think) Czechoslovakia were ploughed up on an EU farming initiative. She felt this encapsulated what is wrong with the EU.
I judge people on their whole character, not because they voted differently to me.

lljkk · 03/08/2019 09:22

I don't really have friends... that said, I know I don't have enough in common with someone if they voted Leave and still support Leave. They can't share my values or see the world how I do or have similar priorities. So it would taint my view of them, yes.

Can still be polite & friendly. But know we aren't really alike at all.

Lweji · 03/08/2019 09:28

Typical.
Voted leave because of meadows being destroyed in one country is all that is wrong with the EU.
And for that she risked all the mess that the UK is in.
Some people may be educated and be smart and really good in their fields, but it still doesn't make them capable of understanding or willing to understand complex subjects outside of their expertise and thus simply don't make smart or educated political decisions.
I'd feel sorry for these people if their vote didn't have implications for so many other people.

Peregrina · 03/08/2019 09:37

Voted leave because of meadows being destroyed in one country is all that is wrong with the EU.

I felt saddened to read that. So if we stay in, we can try to press for improved environmental standards, and I believe that enough other countries would support us - Germany for one where there is a strong environmental movement.

We leave and it's one less country to press the case. There is a good chance that those flower meadows will still be destroyed, but we have trashed our economy in the process.

custardcreamzz · 03/08/2019 09:39

Absolutely, to be honest. The whole thing makes my stomach turn now and I dont think I could be in a relationship with someone who had such different views.

KennDodd · 03/08/2019 09:41

@Mintjulia

What the majority of people appear to be saying is that they won’t tolerate a different point of view and don’t accept that people are entitled to their own opinions !

It's not just about a different viewpoint though is is? The Leave vote has had some very serious consequences for people. Friends of mine have lost their jobs as a direct result of that vote. Look at the increase in violence in NI just as predicted. And regardless of whether you think it's a price worth paying, people will be striped of their rights as EU citizens, that is just a fact. People have a right to be angry about these things.

haverhill · 03/08/2019 09:57

I suspect the meadow issue was the thing that made her mind up, rather than being the one reason she voted Leave, but I can’t speak for her.
I respect her opinion though, it’s hers to have.
The thing is, lots and lots of Leave voters are perfectly nice, reasonable people. They just are. So saying things like you couldn’t possibly be friends with one makes the whole debate faintly ridiculous.
We need respectful and intelligent engagement to figure a way out of this mess. Insulting those who have different opinions achieves absolutely nothing.

KennDodd · 03/08/2019 10:04

We need respectful and intelligent engagement to figure a way out of this mess.

But this mess was caused by Leavers, most of whom are still determined to press on with it and make it even worse.

haverhill · 03/08/2019 10:16

The thing is, what do you suggest as an alternative to respectful engagement?
The fact is that over half the people who voted, voted Leave, for myriad reasons. Painting them all as unintelligent bigots is silly.
What other way forward is there? Genuinely interested.

Peregrina · 03/08/2019 10:19

The mess was originally caused by Cameron trying to shut up the Brexiteers in his Cabinet. There was no clamour from the General Public for a Referendum. It's only now that we apparently want a hard Brexit and want to trade on WTO terms, which most people won't know much about and certainly didn't before the Referendum.

In the North and south west there was anger about being neglected and austerity, and I am sure the vote was a protest about that. It's hard to know what the Leave vote in the comfortable areas of the South East was about.

Lweji · 03/08/2019 10:31

The thing is, lots and lots of Leave voters are perfectly nice, reasonable people.

Nice, I'm sure.
Reasonable.... Don't think so.

I'm all for respectful and intelligent engagement. But I've lost respect for people who didn't look at the issues properly and voted callously because of protest or meadows or I don't care what happens but control.

Lweji · 03/08/2019 10:33

Or because they'll get better tariffs negotiating alone. Grin

Swipe left for the next trending thread