Page 2 | DS is given lots of money. DD isn't

Coffee999 · 2023-04-10T15:22:29+00:00

Hi, my son's godfather gives him £200 at Christmas and £200 for his birthday. He is 15. My daughter, 8, has different god parents who give her a game, a book etc for Christmas and birthday. Should we make/ask our son share this huge amount of money with his sister?

thegrain · 10/04/2023 16:49

Nope you get the god parents your parents choose.

Perhaps the daughter's godparent is better with the spiritual guidance aspect but your sons just throws money at him

MissMarplesbag · 10/04/2023 16:56

No it's his money that was given to him as a gift. Would you share a monetary gift with your siblings?

SpecialMangeTout · 10/04/2023 17:01

You can’t ask him to share.
You can compensate for the difference in the way they are treated.

AgnesX · 10/04/2023 17:01

It's not fair but no, because that's not fair either.

Aylestone · 10/04/2023 17:02

No. Funnily enough you shouldn’t steal your sons money and give it to his sister. That’s the unfortunate side effect of carrying out this silly tradition which has lost all meaning. I find the people who are still choosing godparents for their children are the ones who don’t have a clue what it means. Why have they even got different god parents?

Rewis · 10/04/2023 17:03

They have enough of an age difference for the 8yo to not notice unless it's drawn to their attention. Just have the 15yo to be discreet about the money.

hattie43 · 10/04/2023 17:03

No don't make your son share but you should top up the difference in your daughters savings account ,

wendywoopywoo222 · 10/04/2023 17:03

You can't ask him to share but as a godparent myself I always treat my godchildrens siblings exactly the same. I thought most god parents would of.

junebirthdaygirl · 10/04/2023 17:04

Maybe when she is a teenager it will change to cash as 8 year old rather presents. Maybe best for ds not to be splashing the cash around . At least her godmother does remember her so that's good.

iusedtobeasize8 · 10/04/2023 17:04

No

ReadersD1gest · 10/04/2023 17:06

Why would this even enter your head? If you feel she's being hard done by (she's not, it's just life), then redress the balance yourself.
I wouldn't even do that, though.

ReadersD1gest · 10/04/2023 17:07

wendywoopywoo222 · 10/04/2023 17:03

You can't ask him to share but as a godparent myself I always treat my godchildrens siblings exactly the same. I thought most god parents would of.

Why?

Goldbar · 10/04/2023 17:09

No, I wouldn't make him share it. And with a 7 year age difference, surely the discrepancy isn't that obvious. If there was a 2 year age gap, it might be different. But at 15 he will have lots of things that are unsuitable for a younger child, including more money.

But you might suggest to him that it would be a lovely gesture to buy a present for his little sister. My older sibling used to treat me occasionally when he started a holiday job at 16 and I still remember and appreciate those little gifts.

bellswithwhistles · 10/04/2023 17:10

Why on earth do they have different godparents?! That's the question I'd be asking.

I"m surprised at the number of people saying 'No.

That's £400 a year - surely that godparent would be better off just investing £400 for both of your children in an account?

I simply can't imagine giving one child so much money and ignoring their sibling!

ReadersD1gest · 10/04/2023 17:13

Aylestone · 10/04/2023 17:02

No. Funnily enough you shouldn’t steal your sons money and give it to his sister. That’s the unfortunate side effect of carrying out this silly tradition which has lost all meaning. I find the people who are still choosing godparents for their children are the ones who don’t have a clue what it means. Why have they even got different god parents?

Of course parents are still choosing godparents for their children? You speak as though it's some quaint, archaic practice. It's not.
Also perfectly usual to have different ones for each child.

GnomeDePlume · 10/04/2023 17:15

No. This is the problem with God Parents. DB1 was very fortunate with his GM - he was given £1000 for his 18th birthday by her. Mine would send me a 25p postal order!

This is all 40 years ago. I can still remember but it doesnt rankle.

JudgeRudy · 10/04/2023 17:21

RaininSummer · 10/04/2023 16:39

That's bad luck but that's all it is. I hope your daughter doesn't look at her godparents differently since her brother's are so generous.

But is it? I don't feel hard done by because my grandparents were broke. We didn't get gifts from 1 set, they didn't drive or take me out anywhere...but I loved them all the same.

Eggseggseverywhere · 10/04/2023 17:22

Not sure the Godparent would be happy you consider scamming ds out of his money!

PutinSmellsPassItOn · 10/04/2023 17:25

No, but tbh I'd have asked anyone to dial it back the first time.it happened......it's not something I'd be comfortable with. 😬

MissEira · 10/04/2023 17:25

Of course you cant make him share. At her age i would just get her what she wants for her birthday and when she doesnt have a wish you can give her money to even it out.

ReadersD1gest · 10/04/2023 17:26

PutinSmellsPassItOn · 10/04/2023 17:25

No, but tbh I'd have asked anyone to dial it back the first time.it happened......it's not something I'd be comfortable with. 😬

What isn't? A godparent give their godchild some cash?

thegrain · 10/04/2023 17:28

It's also a poor message to send your daughter that her carefully chosen gifts are worth less than money

Littlefish · 10/04/2023 17:29

GoldenGorilla · 10/04/2023 16:41

I give my godchildren money: if I ever found out the parents were making them share it, there would be no more money!

Absolutely this.

I have three god children. Two have siblings. The money I send is for my god child, no-one else!

Oblomov23 · 10/04/2023 17:29

God no. But I'd save for both of them, save a bit more for her.

Original poster

Coffee999 · 10/04/2023 17:32

Thank you. I appreciate all your feedback. I have clear advice. Amazing!

OP posts: