My mother is in her early 80s and has been very always been sensitive and emotional most of the time. She gets very teary over the fact that my older sister (47), her second born and first daughter, fails to come and see her or check in on her and my dad regularly enough. My dad is in his 90s and his health is not the best. My mum seems to think and feel that my sister doesn’t care about them at all, and complains to me and my other sister about it quite often.
My older sister has three daughters (9, 12, 14) which understandably keeps her busy. She lives about 25/30 minutes away from mum and dad. She used to work full time but now has stopped working for the moment to look after her girls. The thing is she never seems to want to visit our childhood home or make arrangements to come see our mother and father, even for just an hour here or there. My mum isn’t aware she’s not working at the moment. She doesn’t seem to want to get involved with anything that is concerning my mother or helps her with anything much at all.
My sister doesn’t seem to have much empathy or consideration for them and just shrugs her shoulders and says they’re just getting old. She chooses to take overseas holidays and weekends away and never really makes the effort to see them in person anymore and it’s breaking my mum’s heart. Her kids are loaded with weekend activities which leaves little time for my sister to come and see mum and dad, even just by herself. I don’t know why my BIL can’t just look after the kids for an hour or two?. I’m worried that she’ll wake up one day and it will be too late.
I don’t know how to handle this with my mother (or sister). My other sister (45) and I are always around to offer help my mum with simple tasks and keeping her company. She often complains to us about my sister and how she never does this or that.
Any advice from someone who has gone through this would be appreciated.