Hi! Is it pregnancy hormones or is it weird?

[Kardelen]

So!
I have a toddler and I’m pregnant to another. Live with parents and husband. Left my little one at home today, as I had an appointment at 8:15 at the hospital for a routine check.

as per usual, appointment times don’t always go to plan and hasn’t done so with any of my appointments so I always wait minimum half hour after my appointment time to be seen. This time was no different and had to wait.

by the time I came out of the hospital it was after 9am. Mum called and I said I’m driving. Anyway, I quickly popped the local grocery store and bought fresh bread etc for breakfast. By the time I arrived home it was 10, and received another phone call from my mum while I was parking. So didn’t pick up.

when I came home first my dad started saying why I am so late. So I explained. Then my mum started questioning me why I am so late. I said the usual where they don’t see people on time, plus went to get bread etc.

and then she was still in disbelief saying what about before going to get bread it still took long etc etc…

so I sort of raised my voice and said it’s normal… I feel guilty that I raised my voice. But how would you guys have reacted? Is it my pregnancy hormones that make me less patient?

I am not immature but I don’t fancy being attacked on here by other users. I didn’t post to be attacked. This gets me frustrated.

its not as if I didn’t communicate at all. I spoke to them when I left the hospital. The journey takes a good 30-40 minutes anyway. And the amount spent in the shop was less than 5 minutes- to get bread for our breakfast.

I’m heavily pregnant so it’s nearly impossible to be chasing around either sweetheart

Blimey she only asked why you didn't bring your kid with you, no need for the passive aggressive sweetheart 🙄

FWIW, I think you were taking the piss if your appointment overran to then go shopping whilst your elderly parents were looking after a toddler, if you can't chase your child around presumably someone elderly would also struggle?

Your assuming I went to shop for clothes?

just popped into get bread

Oh dear, someone's cage is rattled.

You seem to have a lot of growing up to do OP. Your parents have every right to be irritated with you. I doubt it's the first time you've done this either. Nobody owes you childcare.

Where is your husband in all of this ?

I have to say you are not coming across well here OP

As you have posted in elderly parent, then we have to assume your parents are...elderly. So your challenging toddler is going to be hard work for them.
I can't understand why you didn't either go home straightaway, or call them and say "The appt has over run as usual. I'm about to leave the hospital now. Would you prefer if I come straight back and be there in X minutes, or, I was thinking of going and getting us all a nice fresh loaf, but that will obviously add 15mins on. Which do you prefer?"

Ideally no-one would raise their voice - particularly at someone doing them a favour. Only you know if it is your hormones, or if you are generally snippy which your posts are giving the impression you are.

Nobody said that?

Just take your child next time and save the hassle for yourself and your parents. You're having another so I'm assuming you're happy to care for your kids anyways.

As for shouting I think you were probably out of Order. Your parents were clearly over looking after your son and instead you went somewhere else and then ignored their call.

How old is your son? Your parents? You?

You seem that you feel entitled to them providing childcare for you?

Like it is clearly hard to take a toddler to an appointment so of course they will help - why should they? You choose to have another child. They do not owe you childcare.

Tbh I think it’s hard to say whether your parents over reacted or you did.

If they are always being this difficult yet, then I’d ask what else is going on.
If they happily agreed to look after your ds fur one hour and then got upset you took longer than they thought, then I’d wonder what’s going on. Esp if this isn’t an one off.

If this is a one off, you might not have communicated very well to start with. Or you might be getting angry more easily due to hormones. I’ve had ante natal depression and it’s crap.

Id forget about the ‘You should gave taken your ds with you’. This is MN where everyone is supposed to be totally independent and never needing any help at all. Where people are resentful if you do ask them fir help too.
(but you are also supposed to be able to call a NDN, the church etc… if you are struggling).
I don’t find this is happening in RL.

My advice: have a chat with your parents. See of they are struggling with your ds. Or they feel they have him too often. Or they are worried about having another child in the house.
See what sort if info they need (my mum would need to be told they are likely to be late or she gets anxious).
And take it from there.
If you start from I am right (or they are right) position, you won’t find an easy solution

I don’t think people are reading properly. I did say I informed after the appointment when I was leaving.

i won’t be commenting on your other comments.

We can all read fine, you asked if you were being hormonal or if their behaviour is weird, everyone is telling you either your reaction to shout at them isn't normal and/or that you were in the wrong and you don't want to hear that so are being defensive and snippy and don't want to hear it.

You asked for people’s opinion, people don’t agree with you, now your kicking off 🫤

you probably should have just gone straight home, and you could have taken a toddler to a routine appointment, that’s quite easy, but it’s your choice and that’s ok. Maybe just apologise to your mum and that’s that, lesson learnt. She was doing you a favour and you snapped at her I think you’re in the wrong for that.

Okay thank you

If only people responded like you.
i honestly wouldn’t have minded.

normally they are quite happy to look after and they tell me to leave him when I go for these things.
that’s why I couldn’t understand…

Why did you post in Elderly parents- what age are your DPs?

Some on here are honestly really unkind, you’d need a thick skin to ask people for their opinion on MN.

It’s sad I feel sorry for them and how unhappy they must be with life so I just ignore them.

I’m quite new here. So will treat this as a learning curve 😅 and not reply to anymore comments.

I think so too, unhappy with their lives so they try to make others miserable with their comments.

Oh dear. I don't think it's them. I don't think it's pregnancy hormones either.

Did you thank them for looking after your dc, and apologise for being back a bit later than expected?

I don’t think people are reading properly. I did say I informed after the appointment when I was leaving.

No, you said:
Mum called and I said I’m driving. Anyway, I quickly popped the local grocery store and bought fresh bread etc for breakfast. By the time I arrived home it was 10

So they spoke to you soon after 9 and you told them you were driving, so, logically, they were expecting you home by half past. So, 1/2 an hour later, it wasn't unreasonable that thy were worried.

As a pp said, you are getting very snippy with everyone on this thread, so I am going to presume that you were also unreasonably snippy with your parents. However, only you, and your parents can know that for sure.