'Are lesbians some sort of sacred cow?'
Seriously, though, I'm generally all in favour of keeping debate reasoned and gentle, and for understanding other people's pov. And I have not resorted to name-abusing or abuse on this (or any other) thread.
But surely we have to distinguish between legitimate and illegitimate povs? Which, for me, is probably about the line you cross when your opinion is about disparaging and condemning a whole section of society for no reason other than unpleasant prejudice.
So, scaryteacher is rightwing, and I'm an old lefty, and I expect we would have a vigorous debate about our political differences, without losing sight of each other as people or our own civility and honour.
But if someone disagrees with lesbians just because they are lesbians, that is contributing very directly to the hosility and unfairness that I, my friends and my children have to deal with as a daily reality. Do I have to respect somebody who 'disagrees with lesbians'? No, I don't think so. As a tactic, I would usually choose to continue acting respectfully, but I think they have lost the right to my respect.
And in the OP's example, let's remember that the OP and the teacher's lack of agreement isn't just one of those, "You like Gordon, I like Cameron, we'll just have to agree to disagree" conversations. The OP thinks that her OPINION should be sufficient to censor the teacher from doing what most other teachers take for granted - the ability to mention that she is married (not talk about her sex life, not reveal intimate details about her relationship, just acknowledge her marriage).
So, to martha, I'd reply: are lesbians a sacred cow? Are black people a sacred cow? Are people with disabilities a sacred cow? Well no, none of them, but most people quite rightly recognise and react when a controversial opinion strays over the line into something that should be condemned, not legitimised. I think it's fair enough to come onto MN and start a thread about immigration policy; it's not ok to start a thread saying, "My dd has a black teacher and I'm not happy about it". I would think it fine if someone started a thread challenging the concept of civil partnerships, but I don't think I need to respect it when someone simply says, "Gay people don't have the right to exist in public space, because I'd rather pretend to my children they don't exist". No, no, no, I don't respect that.