Play date with mum who agrees with education tax

[BonnuitMy]

Please let me know if I’m overreacting. I recently overheard a new mum at school talking about a local private school closing down due to the education tax and how this is somehow a good thing. She’s now invited my DD for a play date, would you accept?

😂- and what do you do with mediocre talent in the state system then if it’s not encourage them to be the best they can be? Or sorry - do you not have mediocre talent as they’re all undiscovered geniuses suppressed by the nasty rich people?

Until I hear the objectors of private education rally against educational inequalities that do not specifically affect their own children (e.g. inequalities in achievement amongst some minority groups) then I personally don’t feel the need to explain or reason anyone’s decision to support their DC’s educational attainment. Because it’s quite clear that most people (parents with DC in private and state) support whatever is in their own best interests.

Hate to break it to you but I know lots
of privately educated people with extremely normal jobs! Off top of head
estate agent
state school geography teacher
marketing assistant
sahm now part time in a shop
builder

State school educated friends and acquaintances have similar jobs but also include professor, doctors, solicitors, business owners, senior lucrative IT jobs.

To be fair - who wouldn’t?

Child of aspirational parents who out their child through entry exams to be able to vast their child gif a scholarship only to be deeply embarrassed 5 years later when their child imploded: I’m now a mother to two autistic children

You win the thread!!!

No one can beat this comment, superb.

Often because the state alternative isn’t great. Not everyone lives in the catchment of a great state school. For example our catchment school doesn’t offer GCSE music which isn’t great for a musical child and also doesn’t offer much in the way of sport. It doesn’t even play the sport my child plays at representative level. Where the state alternative is poor, a lot of parents would choose the private route if they can afford it. It’s not always about getting a “leg up”, it’s sometimes about accessing a level of education which some people are lucky enough to be able to access via the state.

I object to all those things.
Am I allowed to comment?
You'll find most teachers do.

Buying privilege others can’t then?
Edit: tried to quote @Another76543 but it didn’t work.

Such is life.

Well it's quite simple really - you don't start from a position of insisting that your child needs to be a super high achieving 'best they can be'.

Well, yes.
But it’s the job of government to try to reduce all that, surely? To do the best for everyone?
And the moral responsibility of the populace to support that.

I didn’t say it’s a misfortune to go to state school, it’s a misfortune for your school to close and be forced to move schools. It’s a misfortune for a school to close where you work.

I’ll await for the comments how moving schools and losing your job is fine.

Many private schools are like some in the state sector (eg faith schools and academically selective schools). Many areas of the country don’t offer any academically schools whatsoever so the only option is to pay. Some children can access similar school via the state. There is huge inequality within the state system. Some are excellent. Others are failing children. If people were really bothered about “equality” they’d look at improving the disparities within the sector serving 93% of children.

For the vast majority of children, moving schools is completely fine though?

Paying to access the same education which some people can access at no cost via the state.

The only option is to pay?
And if you can’t? Come on. You’ll understand if you try really hard.

And if you live in the same place but can’t afford it?
It’s easy to understand.

If your reason for not accepting a play date is that you know that the other child's Mum supports this policy, does that mean that before any other play dates can be arranged, you will be requiring the other child's Mum to declare her position on the issue?

Because (a) asking about that ("Oh how lovely of you to ask, I'm sure they'll have a great time, but first I need to check that you are do not hold bigoted views about children in the independent school sector") is probably going to sound very weird, and (b) the relatively popularity of VAT on school fees means that you're going to be greatly reducing the pool of potential playmates.

Or will you be happy to apply a "Don't ask, don't tell" policy unless the other Mum happens to blurt out her views, and pretend that she is part of the minority that agrees with you?

Yes it’s easy to understand. Some can access an excellent education via the state. Others can’t. That’s where the inequality lies. As you say, you’ll understand if you try really hard. Why are people so blind to the inequalities within the state sector? Why are people so keen to defend it? Presumably because they’re not the ones having to put up with dire state provision.

Would you mind clarifying?

It was quite a simple statement, so not sure there is much to clarify. I'm a teacher at a school with a lot of flux / kids coming and going. I've probably come across hundreds of kids moving schools in my career. For the vast majority, moving schools is completely fine and they take it in their stride.

My eldest 2 went to our local school, it was either SM or RI the whole time they were there- still managed to gain good GCSE results and DD1 gained AAAA* at a level

so yeah even in shit school’s bright kids manage to do well

I knew DD wouldn't be happy at our specific State provision, teachers who worked there confirmed this
Thats why in our case

And not giving a crap about their childs education is why many parents choose State
Except that isn't actually true, its a stupid and lazy stereotype

I don't necessarily disagree with you but in terms of choice...those who choose private school have a genuine choice. They could choose state school.
Whereas most people who send their children to state schools have no choice...they can't afford private, therefore those who choose private will have actual reasons for opting for private whereas state school parents often will have no reason besides finances.