@cansu I'm glad your dd is in a setting that works. I'm not saying there should be no specialist schools. I'm saying that use of suspension and PEX isn't the way do it. My son has adhd, asd and the dreaded pda profile. He is however managing well at his second mainstream primary with a 1-2-1 and the turnaround has been remarkable.
His original HT never wanted him. Didn't really want any kids with SEND. Had form for constantly suggesting to parents that a different setting would be better. Set a poor leadership example and basically bullied parents (not just us).
She was convinced she was always right. And it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. The environment created an us and them culture between the children, anxiety and stress for my son and, frequent distressed behaviour from his treatment (like a criminal to be managed).
And then the HT sees that as evidence of her position. And she then had this power, having created that situation, to make it into a disciplinary issue, and to suspend and exclude rather than provide education.
Literally the worst experience of my adult life. I hadn't really understood discrimination until it happened. It was the powerlessness and the capriciousness of the decisions.
It has to end because the practice of using exclusion to manage SEND belongs in the dark ages.