What are the requirements of a houseparent/housemistress in a boarding school?

[liza25]

Hello everybody!
I am considering on applying as a housemistress in a boarding school. I boarded myself when I was a teenager and I absolutely loved it. My HM was so lovely and I'm still in touch with her today. My question is, what kind of degree do you need to become a housemistress ( university etc.)? And what's the average HM age (silly question I know!)?
Thank you xx

My DS boarded at a big name full boarding school and Ive worked in big name full boarding school bar 1 they are always teachers often senior teachers and it’s part of their path towards a head job or equivalent. In these schools they are well paid often 80-100k pa but IMO earn every penny of it as it’s a 24/7 job 33-34 weeks of the year.
Assistant house masters/mistresses matrons house support staff etc aren’t always teachers and even especially at less prestigious schools or those with a small number of boarders you may also in these type of schools find housemasters/mistresses who are teachers.

Aren’t teachers not are

Happy is partly correct, my DD is at CLC and they keep the academic and pastoral roles separate and so Housemistresses are not usually teachers, although some are. What they seem to look for are people who will put the girls first and foremost, can arrange weekend activities and control budgets. I'm afraid I don't know what training they would have, but a background in childcare would definitely be an advantage. I'm not sure what other girls schools and preps do, but CLC can't be the only one.

My DC has to board (UK) and we have never been told what qualifications the boarding staff have. The previous heads of boarding (married couple) had experience, but no formal teaching certificates, as one of them qualified as a teacher just before they moved to a different school.

I always believed that there were no formal requirements. I shall be interested to see more posts on this thread.

DD is at a mixed vocational boarding school. The house mothers are not teaching staff, their role is pastoral to support the student in the residential areas. I’m pleased that they have that distinction between the teachers (educational) and the boarding (home) areas. The house mothers are able to focus exclusively on their boarders, I imagine it’s a difficult balance to do that if you’re combining a teaching role with a house parent role.

I'm currently a houseparent in a small-ish independent school. I'm a qualified teacher, and began with small boarding roles alongside teaching. Over 5 years I progressed to more senior roles and now that I'm houseparent I no longer teach (my choice). I'm early 30s.

I don't think it matters what degree you have - pastoral and boarding experience is far more important. There are direct qualifications in boarding you can do through the BSA, but they're a lot of effort if you're not yet in a boarding role!

Parkinssheet interesting I was thinking about all the HMs I know about either though Winchester where DS2 went or through work (3 very big name boarding schools) all bar 1 were teacher with a teaching commitment. As I said above the male HMs in particular were using it as a stepping stone either onto becoming a prep school head or deputy head or equivalent of a senior school.
I personally don't think you need to be teacher but I suspect some parents expect it over the years Ive noticed a lot of snobbery from some parents around HMs regarding background degree subject previous position in the school and even previous schools worked at etc. Having worked very closely with some (who had teaching commitments as well as being HMs) I personally think it's a very tough job and a huge amount of work and commitment so maybe not being a teacher is better because it gives them more time to concentrate on the pastoral stuff.

Dd was at a vocational boarding school too and the matrons were not teachers. They needed to have a robust knowledge of safeguarding procedures and pastoral care.

The staff have all completed various levels of BSA Boarding Managment training.

Matrons aren’t Housemistress Totally different roles. Historically they were women of a certain age and class who were single for a variety of reasons divorce etc and had grown up/teenage children they also often had no home of their own often due to messy divorce. They were given reasonable self contained accommodation often in a boarding house as part of the job, cheap/free living e.g food utilities paid for etc. In return they did everything organised washing, cleaners, gave out medication took kids to hospital appointments and often offered pastoral care and support and a wise ear to the pupils in their houses, who often view them as mother stand ins whilst at school, not all pupils want to talk about their personal problems to a teachers and then see them next day over a biology book. As schools have become increasingly hard up schools have experienced trained nurse working in their medical/health centres and junior teaching staff can’t afford accommodation around a school and boarding has moved to weekly flexi the role of matron has changed, many now work in the day only, there’s often no accommodation, many of their roles are being done by junior teachers/tutors who are often juggling teaching commitments extra curricular activities as well.
DS2 was lucky a matron was resident 24/7 but this is becoming increasingly unusual.

At dds school the matrons are the houseparents. The boarding houses are off site so the children have the sense of leaving school to “go home” at the end of the day.

So what is the difference between a matron and a house mistress (or house parent)?

My dd has a head of house and house assistants.
There is also an assistant head of House.
The head and assistant have more responsibility obviously, but the house assistants organise all the activities and accompany children out of school.
I think it's a lovely job, none of her House staff are teachers, they go home after teaching, the house staff are on a rota, so days and nights, plus weekends.

Housemasters & housemistresses at my DCs schools all had a teaching role. From what I gather they all started as house tutors & worked their way up. It's a huge commitment as you have to be on duty 24/7 because when your child is boarding we parents need to know our teenagers are being cared for as well as we could.

Whereas at dd’s School at 6pm they were all handed over to the care of the boarding staff (& the teachers go home).

I think it very much depends on the school. At traditional boarding schools the house master/mistress is likely to be a senior teacher, they will live in often with their families who will be more or less involved, they will often have spacious accommodation, for most parents of boarding school children they are the first port of call for most things, from querying term dates to dealing with academic concerns, all I've worked and DS2's will monitor the academic progress of their pupils grades effort marks etc, advise on GCSE A levels universities provide references for UCAS forms etc and undertake pastoral care of their pupils including working closely with parents when there are issues at home affecting a child e.g death divorce and ill health, and they will often speak to another teacher on a child's behalf if there's issues or worries and if a child is in torunbp;e at school they will support them on top of this they usually have some sort go teaching commitment. They will be assisted by an assistant house master/mistress who may or may not live in and whose probably hoping to get a house master/mistress job in the future, then there will be tutors who will do at least one day a week in the house and one of them might live in as well. The there will usually be a matron as well who as I said above may or may not live in. Its a massive and exhausting job they are often very well paid 80K not being unheard off and that all Ive worked with take it very seriously.

Meant to add that at DS2’s school all the teaching staff lived in and around the school in school accommodation so I suppose you could say no “going home” But then the school operates 24/7 in the evening etc there were numerous concerts plays lectures and other extra curricular activities running all the time which staff were involve/participating/watching. So everyone on site is part of boarding life.

At my dd’s school each house has a full time live in matron whose responsibility it is to do the laundry make the beds up for borders , do the sewing - all the household jobs. They are all older and aren’t teachers.
Each house also has a housemistress if they’re girls and a housemaster for the boys. They are all experienced teachers and are responsible for the running of the house- it’s a 24 hour 7 days a week job and they all teach also. They are responsible for pastoral care of all students in their house not just the boarders.

They live on site-

At my dd’s school, the housemistress is a teacher , they have one in each boarding house. All the other staff are from nursing backgrounds or general pastoral support experience roles.

Sorry I forgot to answer your question about ages, I would say the house mistress in each house is 30s-40s. The other staff are a mix of older, some much younger.

I always think it would be a lovely job, especially with accommodation on site etc.
Ours even have their dogs and cats living there who wander in and out.

My experiences (across handful of different well known schools) same as hsppygardening in all the schools I know. Matron and her assistants the only staff without additional roles.
I personally think role is very, very hard to do well. Matron does a lot of the practical stuff plus lots of hugs, the years 12/13 do a lot of informal ‘policing’ (following a set of rules that certainly don’t match the official ones but are completely respected by the kids), and every single other role falls to the housemaster who has to manage these two groups expertly as well as manage the kids and the parents and the tutors. Not an easy role and I think the type of degree less important than natural ability to organise, empathise and lead.

TBH I’d be quite shocked and, as a parent, not very happy if a housemistress role went to someone who had not had a previous assistant role and who was not already closely involved in boarding school life in some way. It’s far too risky to take on someone inexperienced given the trust the parents place in the housemaster/mistress role.

I agree with Theblessedcheesemaker, I would expect a Housemistress to have been in a junior house role first. Also where they are not steeped in boarding school culture it can be very difficult.
A Housemistress is very different to a matron, especially in a boys/co-Ed school where HMs are often a step away from a deputy headship or headship. Happygardening is right that some girls schools follow the traditional set up of senior teacher as HM supported by assistant HMs and matrons, others, like my daughter's, do not. DS's school has a complicated structure of HM, assistant HM, house tutors, matrons. But it all works out as you don't need a relationship with everyone, just the main ones for your DC. In my case HM, tutor and matron. But DD's school the main contact for everything is the HM, I'm not even sure if they have separate matrons. I think maybe not and the assistant HMs take on a semi-matron role as they are all purely pastoral and do not teach, doesn't mean they didn't originally train as teacher though.

The first houseparents I ever met (prep) had extensive experience of boarding husband was a teacher had been a teacher previously in a boarding prep their children had boarded. Both husband and wife ran the house together they oozed knowledge confidence competence and care. They listened to parents knew when to turn a blind eye to endless pillow fights and form raid and when to say enough is enough, they organised 25+ small boys with help of a couple of matrons to ensure they were wearing the right footwear uniform brushed their hair teeth showered etc they read stories drunk coco looked at stars at night allowed tree climbing provided treats and healthy snack at the right moments spontaneously took children to the local beach applied sun lotion and ensure all wore sun hats were always fair and cheerful. A big job the children loved them and all were very happy.