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Original poster

please help me with my school dilemma

97 replies

shergar · 08/04/2007 22:10

DH and I can't decide between two schools for our DD, who starts Reception in September. We currently have places reserved at both, and in the next two weeks will need to cancel one.

School #1 is the local state primary, which is 5 minutes walk away. It is lovely, and has its own swimming pool and little wood, and is Outstanding in all Ofsted categories with a great headmaster (however, pretty sure he'll retire soon). Our neighbour's DD, who our DD loves, is also starting there at the same time, and another neighbour's DD will go the year after too. After school care there (DH and I work full time) is a bit of an issue though - children are taken by bus to a childcare centre a mile away, and I feel quite worried about the logistics of it all. (Neighbour also works, and would use same childcare for after school).

School #2 is the local prep school, which is also lovely and set in a huge area of parkland, with brilliant facilities. DD has been at the nursery there and so knows it well, and we originally just intended to send her there as we didn't think we'd get a place at School #1. It's a 10 minute drive away (too far to walk, and across a dual carriageway). There are classes of ten though, and children can stay there doing various activities until 5.30pm, which I am more comfortable with as an after school care plan.

We can afford #2, though it won't be easy as there is a DS to follow in 2 years (Option #1 would definitely allow for more other things like exciting holidays, music lessons and home improvements!) and we just can't work out what to do for the best. Any advice or perspectives gratefully received, and I know that these are both good choices and we're lucky to have them.

OP posts:
ScummyMummy · 08/04/2007 22:15

I'd go for number one because I'd much prefer my children to be at state schools and would only consider private in extreme circumstances. But I also think the local friends, swimming pool, and financial non-penury sound like excellent reasons!

hana · 08/04/2007 22:16

def one
save your money for secondary if you go down that route

percypig · 08/04/2007 22:19

I'd go for school number one, partly because I'm not a big fan of private education, and partly because I really think it's important for primary schools to be part of your local community, iykwim.

The fact that your son will have a friend there, it's so close etc makes it sound perfect. Also, if it's outstanding in Ofsted, then any advantage from small private school class sizes will be outweighed.

Finally, education doesn't just happen in school (and I'm a teacher!) and having more money for extra-curricular things would be a big plus for me.

As for the child-care, is there any chane you and your neighbour could arrange a childminder or part-time nanny together, if you're worried about the distance etc. Personally I don't think it's great for children that age to come out of school (usually tired) and straight on to another biggish centre, going to a childminder's house or even home with a nanny would be my preference.

bozza · 08/04/2007 22:20

I was also going to suggest school one and a childminder.

Hulababy · 08/04/2007 22:23

I'd go for option 2 - child familiar to school, no after school care issue (and after school childminders very scarse where we live).

Only you know if the financial sacrifices are too great.

cat64 · 08/04/2007 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ScummyMummy · 08/04/2007 22:36

Walking to school is also lovely, I think. Real benefit.

Aloha · 08/04/2007 22:37

Are you mad? Number one, obviously!

pointydog · 08/04/2007 22:48

re no 1 childcare - if the children are taken by bus to the after-school centre why are you worrying? Sounds fine.

jennifersofia · 08/04/2007 22:54

Number 1, definitely. Walking to school, v. local friends, freed up fees, etc.

brimfull · 08/04/2007 22:59

no 1 definately.
socially she will be with her local friends which I think is vital for happy children imo.

Nothing worse than all the neighbourhood kids going to the local school and you are the only one at a different school.

Tinker · 08/04/2007 23:04

Don't understand the dilemma. No 1. definitely.

pooka · 08/04/2007 23:09

No 1 without a doubt. Sounds lovely and if you are concerned about the afterschool childcare you could use the money saved from school fees (which will increase as your children get older) to investigate maybe getting a childminder to do school pick up if you'd prefer.
Tot up the cost per annum of option 2, taking into account when ds starts too, and try and save a proportion that you would have spent otherwise for the future. Would make a not inconsiderable nest egg.

Judy1234 · 08/04/2007 23:29

School 2. The after school club is better. We have had 5 children in private schools over the last 19 years and they have been excellent in so very many ways.

Gobbledigook · 08/04/2007 23:33

I'd personally go for option one and find another way around the after school childcare issue.

The state school is outstanding AND you'll have the money to pay for nice extras.

This is what we do. Our state primary had a recent Ofsted and was outstanding in every category. It's a brilliant school and we pay for things out of school like swimming lessons, French lessons, Spanish, football coaching. We have the disposable income to pay for nice holidays, clothes, days out whenever we want etc.

We don't have the childcare issue though as I work from home.

Gobbledigook · 08/04/2007 23:34

Oh and you can walk to option one - a real plus point. For various reasons, I drive to school and I bloody hate it. That's the only downside (but will be a non-issue once all are in school - I have to get my youngest to nursery now so that's why I need to drive).

shouldbedoingsomethingelse · 08/04/2007 23:35

number 1

NO number 2

NO number 1

NO

Oh I dont know I think they both sound great. If the afterschool bit is the only thing worring you pop into school and talk to the head. They may be able to put you in touch with other parents who use it.

pointydog · 08/04/2007 23:36

Not convinced there is a childcare issue.

A minibus picks up the kids from various schools near me and takes them to the after-school club which is just like any other after school club.

No issue if it's well run.

Gobbledigook · 08/04/2007 23:37

ANd, imo, it's more 'healthy' to do things out of the school environment - so I prefer that mine do clubs out of school, have friends for tea and go to others' houses after school. For some reason, I don't like the idea of school being the one place that provides everything.

penmack · 08/04/2007 23:39

no 1 definately. a great school close by with some ready made friends sounds fantastic. children at good state school can get just as good result as those at private schools

shouldbedoingsomethingelse · 08/04/2007 23:42

Our local after school club walks the children from 2 schools (16 children although they will be taking more as they are recruiting extra staff))its only a short walk but along a busy road and across another busy road and they dont use the crossing!

ChocolateTeapot · 08/04/2007 23:46

I would chose number 1 without hesitation.

Judy1234 · 08/04/2007 23:48

Don't forget that 7% of children are in private schools but make up 50% of the university population at the better universities and earn £XXXX more than state school pupils over their future 40 year career, speak better, achieve more, get smaller classes and you have more power as a parent paying fees etc than at the mercy of the state etc etc. It's no contest - go for 2.

themoon66 · 08/04/2007 23:55

I'd choose number 1. Walking distance and same facilities as the fee-paying one. No contest.

shouldbedoingsomethingelse · 08/04/2007 23:55

a Big issue for me would be the class sizes. (10 in a class - grab it now and dont let go

Friends at the same school arent too important IMHO. My DD had her 2 best friends move away with the 1st 2 years of schooling.

Their is no reason why she cant still be friends with your neighbours children.

If I could afford no 2 that would be the option I think I would go for.