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Original poster

Anyone have knowledge of Ampleforth?

194 replies

Tinkerboo · 01/12/2006 14:20

Any Dh's go there? or DS's or DD's now?
We looked around. Out of our league price wise I think, but we were impressed with the young people and the ethos, were we duped?

OP posts:
Judy1234 · 03/12/2006 17:59

I'm afraid the posts on this thread are not exactly an advertisement for boarding schools. The issue isn't fluffy duvets and more exeats these days but the being apart from parents and not having the escape at night in your own safe bed room at home if things go wrong. It's like the bullying in the army. Those environments are not ideal. On the other hand more chdilren are abused and hit and burnt by parents than strangers so I suppose home is the least safe environment there is for some children.

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 03/12/2006 19:29

Xenia, my brother was in the army/Marines for some of the time I was a boarding school, and we always found it ironic how similar our experiences were. I am one of those for whom it was the best alternative to being at home - but I still think parents should be made more aware of what boarding can really be like.

Tonka2 · 19/12/2008 05:31

Hmm that was wierd stumbled across this whilst looking for baby info. I too went to good old AH.

Maisie2009 · 22/12/2008 00:44

Hello, I know I probably shouldn't post but I just can't help it, am completely new to mumsnet but my big sister is about to become a Mummy, was googling baby names and this site came up! Just wanted to dispel a few rumors really, I went to boarding school, and either weekly boarded or was a full-timer from the age of 11, for the first term I was a day girl, but I just felt so left out of everything that went on in the evening that I begged to board. It was the best decision of my life, I had such amazing relationships with my teachers, which meant I had fantastic, personal statements for uni, that admissions tutors could see were heartfelt and from people really involved in my life. I never felt I couldn't go home, or that i had to stick it out. My Dad would come and watch sport games, and I could ring home whenever I wanted. I never felt deserted and feel that boarding made me who I am, interestingly I am one of four siblings, all who have boarded at some point or another. I have a brilliant relationship with both my parents and their new partners, and all the girls and boys at my school (very academic) had a fantastic time. To the point of Ampleforth, I know many people from there at uni, they are very well rounded, full of respect and pride for their school, they said there was no bullying and all years looked after one another! Hope this was helpful, sorry about the essay, but it seemed like you mums needed an up to date point of view!

Anteater · 23/12/2008 17:42

DS is running in a cross country race at Ampleforth in January, so will watch out for the fluffy duvets.
Know a couple of families with childern here; all very happy...

BrieVinDeAlkaSeltzer · 23/12/2008 17:48

Tinkerboo

A former Managing Drector of mine went there,can't say too much otherwise I will identify him.

He has just finished doing 3.5 years for fraud and was so arrogant that he went on the run and told his solicitor that the British police and the SFO were so stupid they would never find him.

How suprised was he to be coming out of Mass in Australia on a Sunday morning and find himself nicked.

Sorry, of absolutely no relevance at all, but I felt that I should share that with you all.

Fragrant · 02/07/2014 19:47

I went to the sister boarding school in Harrogate in the Sixties, and all I can say is "my friends' brothers were great!" A fantastic legacy to share and most did well and achieved much in life 'after school'. I did the same for my son - and he's fantastic! Great values and ideals/ great players in Society! x

flourandeggs · 29/11/2020 20:01

Does anyone have any idea about what is happening at Ampelforth? I have never heard of this happening to a school before, must be pretty major? But if it has such bad issues why are the current pupils allowed to stay?

MrPickles73 · 01/12/2020 06:55

Op this post was more than 6 years old.
If you Google there is a safeguarding report for Ampleforth from around 2018. If you read it I think you will struggle to send a child there.. other schools are available.

flourandeggs · 01/12/2020 07:53

Thanks @MrPickles73 I wouldn’t send a child there if someone offered me a million pounds to do it. Just wondering why it is shut to new pupils but still keeping old ones. A scare tactic to get it to finally modernise it’s safeguarding or something more sinister. I have a friend who was sexually abused there in the early 90’s so I follow the school with horrified interest.

CoconutGrove · 01/12/2020 09:19

I remember reading a newspaper article written by the sister of someone who committed suicide, having been abused at Ampleforth. It was one of the saddest things I've ever read. He'd gone away to school a happy, lovely, "never any trouble" boy of about 8 and come back so traumatised he couldn't speak. Sad

Alwaystheplusone · 01/12/2020 10:53

The executive summary of the 2018 report into Ampleforth and Downside is one of the most horrific things I’ve ever read. Hard to believe both schools are still open.

MrPickles73 · 01/12/2020 11:20

I agree.

flourandeggs · 01/12/2020 11:27

And sadly not confined to Ampleforth. My husband remembers a teacher at his famous prep being ‘reassigned’ to another school... teachers complicit, parents complicit, brushed under the carpet. It shatters children’s lives. But how it was going on at ampleforth up to 2015 beggars belief.

angrysquirrel73 · 01/12/2020 13:41

Shudder.

Loshad · 01/12/2020 21:05

Ampleforth had always had issues.
When i was a very naive kid I remember friends brothers coming home from the holidays and saying things like “its ok if your not a monks favourite “ 😳 I had no idea.
More recently my dc have often played them and I have been shocked at the lack of safeguarding. There is a shop and tea room open to the public literally in the middle of the school, and weekend retreats for the public alos take place within the grounds. At any of these the public are not dbs checked and could easily mingle with students.

Loshad · 01/12/2020 21:06

You are ! Not your

MrPickles73 · 01/12/2020 22:59

But what I don't understand is why parents are still sending their children there?

EwwSprouts · 02/12/2020 08:13

But what I don't understand is why parents are still sending their children there?

This 100%. They can't not know. The Church over love for your own child?

The failures and failure still to address failure is evidenced. www.theguardian.com/education/2020/nov/28/pupils-barred-ampleforth-college-catholic-school-abuse-scandal

angrysquirrel73 · 02/12/2020 08:33

EwwSprouts I'm guessing from the falling church congregations (we are now the only people I know of our age that go to church) I can't think its the love of the church. Is it dedication to the school you attended yourself?? I just don't get it. What criteria do people use to select a school for their children?

CoconutGrove · 02/12/2020 09:06

They must think the abuse there is a thing of the past. You wouldn't pay £36K to send your child somewhere you thought they were at risk surely. Maybe some come from overseas and haven't researched that aspect

flourandeggs · 02/12/2020 09:10

Giles Coren wrote about the phenomenon of picking your old school in the Times... he hated his prep and was suicidal whilst there and still found himself putting his son’s name down. His article openly questions a system that has people believing that who they are as people is entirely down to their school and that they wouldn’t be who they are without the experiences even if they are very negative.

MrPickles73 · 02/12/2020 09:29

flourandeggs. I find this interesting. I asked at our prep school how parents choose and the teacher said quite directly (for boys at any rate) they choose where they went themselves. I was Hmm. We've moved so it's not an option for us but is this really still a belief? Your school made you the person you are? Confused I will try to read it but unfortunately don't have a subscription to the times.

flourandeggs · 02/12/2020 10:03

@MrPickles73 I will see if I can find the article, it was really thought provoking. I think the thing is that private schools market themselves as turning out a particular type of person, and so people believe sometimes that they are a product only of that and that they must perpetuate that for their children. I think at its core it is a fairly basic form of tribalism.
Of course we are a product of so much more than a school - our genes, our family, our friends, various series of events beyond our control... You meet people who went to the same school and they are very different from each other.
But to pick a school where you were abused to send your child to - I would suggest that people are actually unstable if they do that.

flourandeggs · 02/12/2020 10:05

@MrPickles73 Here we go.

www.esquire.com/uk/life/news/a16542/giles-coren-son-schools/

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