Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Flip

1 2 ··· 14 15 16 ··· 39 40

Original poster

Think Carefully Before Opting for Private Education

999 replies

PRMum2012 · 29/04/2013 23:50

i am a mum of two (23 months and 3 in august)I am self-employed, part time and married to a lovely architect. We have a great life and two happy kids.

On paper I would say I have not done too badly with my life and my aim is to work full time as soon as possible now my kids are a bit older. If the work was available I would happily work full time now.

Despite setting up my own business I can't help feeling like a failure that I can't afford for my own children, what my parents did for me.... It annoys me that I put so much importance on it ... I am now passionate about finding a decent local primary school for my children so they don't feel the same pressure i do now, when they are older and looking for schools for their kids ....but i'll be honest ......assuming i can afford it i would try and do it from 11 if i can....!!!!...

Hopefully by then, my kids will have an input too and they will be forming their own opinions on the issue.

Depending on mortgage and family support I can't see that it's possible for anyone with two kids earning under £80,000 - £1000,000 + (as a family income) to afford private education anymore, my advice is unless you have a thriving business or two, work as a dr, lawyer or banker.... Forget it.

It's really hard to watch my younger sibling do it for her kids, they are paying for private prep while we cant afford it.... But it really upsets me I feel like this... why can't I just be happy for them and quietly satisfied that I don't need to pay on top of my taxes for my kids education.

For my own primary education i went privately, tried the local school for secondary education but was bullied so moved back to the private system.... I had a mix of private and state during secondary - my second private school was amazing but the second state school I attended for 6th form (my choice) was great too so why is this all having such an impact on what I want for my own kids.

My DH is much more laid back, he went privately all the way through but doesn't place as much value on it as I do/did....I wish I felt the same way but all I feel now is pressure to earn more money so I can pay for them both from 11.

OP posts:

bella65 · 02/05/2013 14:26

TBH I had never until I was enlightened here, heard of Costco. Pray tell me what and where it is? Not that I will buy my chickens there but I obviously need educating.

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 14:28

Dogs I totally agree about people jumping onto something regardless of what is being said.

If I said that I prefer to shop at Waitrose and turned my nose up at people who shop in bulk and from market traders no doubt i would get hammered. When I say that I prefer to bulk buy etc I still get hammered.

But hey ho, its not as if the double standards being displayed is anything new.

mumsneedwine · 02/05/2013 14:38

Wow ! Been busy at work and come back and find we have moved onto chickens (& Costco !!). Got to love MN.

seeker · 02/05/2013 15:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 15:45

Welcome back mums. It's not just chicken. We've also covered fruit and household insurance :)

Maybe we should get MNHQ to move this thread over to a more appropriate housekeeping-ish forum. What do you think?

bella65 · 02/05/2013 16:09

I don't think anyone turned their noses up at shopping in bulk or market traders- both excellent ways of saving a few quid.

But it's what you buy in bulk that is the issue here :)

It's all about whether you buy 1 Costco chicken or 500.

BTW is Costco a cousin of Tesco?

CecilyP · 02/05/2013 16:43

I have never heard of Costco either but I have a feeling it makes Tesco seem posh.

bella65 · 02/05/2013 16:45

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 16:48

Wishi - The simple answer is that I can't taste the difference between Costco chicken and chicken from a naice store :)

But can you imagine the comments if I were to say that I only buy my chicken from Waitrose and to turn my nose up at people who shop at Costco?

Anyway, the Costco chicken thing is a red herring. My DCs lunch is included in the school fees. I have company plastic which means that the company pays for me to regularly eat at Ramsay's Maze. I don't like oven ready meals so we eat a lot of vegetables, pasta and rice which is quite cheap. My kids prefer water to fizzy drinks. We only drink wine when we go out and that usually goes onto the company plastic.

So the above means that our food bill is quite cheap. However, a lot of MNetters seemed to have fixated on my cheap food bill in isolation. The fact that I spend about £150 a month on eating out, thanks to the company, doesnt get through to people because it spoils the story of a family penny pinching in order to pay the fees.

In fact it's funny how a lot doesn't get through to people. We accept that things won't always be so good for us (triple dip recession anyone?) so we bank DP's income for a rainy day. Yet posters here keep going on about how we are sacrificing stuff to pay the fees and how we are making choices that they wouldn't make. What, they wouldn't choose to privately educate their kids while banking about £45k per year .

Anyway, heading off home now. Be interesting to see if Costco chicken is still being discussed come tomorrow morning.

dogsandcats · 02/05/2013 17:00

Are you, MTSgroupie, going to carry on eating Costco chicken. That is what I really want to learn from this thread!

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 17:04

OP - Mega aplogies for hijacking your thread.

I bet you never thought that it would have morphed into a thread about Costco chicken

wordfactory · 02/05/2013 17:07

I have stopped going to Costco.

Everytime I venture in there I get seduced by the supposed bargains and end up leaving with 99 croissants or an elctronic keyboard! One time DH and I bought a badminton set!

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 17:15

dogs - yesterday evening I popped in to get some drumsticks. £7.95 for 24. Does that answer your question :)

Meal 1. Peri peri drumsticks with cumcumber slices , red pepper slices, home made coleslaw.

Meal 2. BBQ drumsticks with mash and carrots.

I reckon £5.50 per meal for the family.

seeker · 02/05/2013 17:25

So no concerns at all about animal welfare? Just checking.

rabbitstew · 02/05/2013 17:26

That's it - I'm never buying my chicken in Costco if it's actually red herring.

CecilyP · 02/05/2013 17:27

Surely, then, you have already broken your £42 a week barrier, if you include the £4 for fruit, Earl Grey and the cost of the one pint of milk you make last a whole week for 2 children. Do they not have breakfast during the week or lunch at the weekend?

rabbitstew · 02/05/2013 17:35

CecilyP - I think they just eat red herring.

flatmum · 02/05/2013 17:43

What's wrong with Costco chicken? I missed that.

Costco is not really that cheap or that low brow in my neck of the woods, in fact all the times I have been there have been with mothers I private school kids that don't bother working to but ski clothies for their winter holiday.

seeker · 02/05/2013 17:52

Costco chicken is no worse than Tesco value or any other cheap chicken. It will have been produced under dire welfare standards. It may also be full of antibiotics and other nasties. But it's the welfare standards that bother me.

I would also be bothered about the welfare standards of the people who make cheap ski clothes.

bella65 · 02/05/2013 17:53

Jolly gosh!

You can't taste the difference between battery chicken and free range, smothered in love Henny Penny? Battery farmed chicks have tiny thighs because they don't move, they are plumped up with growth promoters and their teeny legs can't support them, and they taste like cotton wool.

I still can't see how you feed 4 people on £6 a day ( and we are not accounting here for items like loo rolls, washing up stuff, laundry products which most people include in their 'food' bill) UNLESS all you are providing is one evening meal and everyone eats out during the day, doesn't eat breakfast , and doesn't snack at all.

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 18:19

Cecily - Some days our kids come home, grab a peanut butter sandwich and head off again. Other days we are either having a business dinner or we are working late in which case its a business expense that is put on the company plastic. Other days we aren't particular hungry so an alopecia enough. So it's not £5-£7 x 7 days a week. As for breakfast, how expensive do you think a serving of cereal is or a slice of toast? Also what do you think is the unit price for a tea bag plus hot water?

This is a weird sub thread. Usually I am asked to justify why I spend so much money on education. I am now being asked to justify why I spend so little on food. .

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 18:20

an "apple" is enough.

Wishihadabs · 02/05/2013 18:20

MTS of course you can live your life anyway you like, and I can think it's really unusual. Either you are being economical with the truth or you are behaving really quite oddly.
Just to recap, you both work ft, you get to eat out and travel for work so you think your dcs don't need to go abroad for a summer holiday or might enjoy eating something other than Costco chicken and half a cup of warm milk!

But it's all ok because you are putting dp ssalary away each month. What are your dcs going to remember of family life growing up ? A meagre existence at home because mum and dad were busy working and going away or out to eat with work, but not with them ? That all the money went on school fees and savings. Of corse your life, your choice but why have you choose this path ?

MTSgroupie · 02/05/2013 18:26

I have repeatedly said that the school fees include lunch. I have repeatedly said that breakfast is usually toast or cereal.

iseenodust · 02/05/2013 18:26

Now I need to know more about MTS's DH - "an apple is enough" for dinner. Does he not say 'nice snack now what's for dinner?'.

Flip

1 2 ··· 14 15 16 ··· 39 40