I send my child to private school because....?

[jabed]

Well, I don?t actually, I just work in one. But it seems to be a constant source of questioning on MN and given the current news articles (I have been reading the DM and Tory graph online) about how many of our left wing leaders hypocritically claim to be egalitarian and socialist whilst buying education for their children , or have had education paid for by their own parents. I just wondered, what is it we expect from education, and why is it some of us are willing to pay for whatever that is and how they see that as worthy of their money.

There you go. :)

It was exactly the oterh way around for us. DS has just com;pleted his reception year in a very traditional prep; small class size, flexible over hours he attends and prepared to have him shadowed by ABA tutor, fairly structured approach - he has done better then we dared to hope.
The stat option on offer was class size of 34, he would have had to move at 7, and as I've already said wouldn;t permit us to have our tutor with him. Twas a no-brainer, despite the expense.
There's no reason in pricniple why the state system shouldn;t be able to accommodate a child like ds - though the class size will always be an issue. It's not an issue of can't, but won't.

I don't know anything about your cause, karlos. But it is seriously crap if you can't find a suitable school for your child. I am not stupid enough to think that any school or sector suits everyone. I wasn't rubbishing you. All I have said is that you are completely wrong about John O'Farrell.

I went to a state comp, which was genuinely comprehensive. My drama teacher took me and my friends to see everything the Royal Shakespeare Company put on, I took part in a German poetry reciting competition, mock elections, debating society, I edited the school newspaper, learnt seceral musical instruments, was in all the plays and even did a bit of district sport. I left with 13 GSCEs and the best A level grades, and since then I've got rather too many degrees, mostly from Oxbridge but two from RG universities, I'm in a job I love and having a great life. I don't feel even slightly inferior to my colleagues who went to indie schools - if anything I'm just incredibly grateful for the genuinely rich diversity of my schooling, from the debating hall to the low-paid student jobs, from the orchestra to the mosh pit. Comprehensives can be brilliant, and not just in the leafy 'burbs (mine wasn't). (Just to redress the balance on this thread! As for my accent...it was described recently as 'lovely, softly spoken and softly pronounced. Which I took as a compliment.)

You are lucky if you found a suitable school. I didn't get very far in looking for DS but enough to know that the ones I favoured wouldn't have him.

They meant they couldn't hear you very well, TheSecret....

Ah, that may be because elocution wasn't on the syllabus at the local comp.....! :)

Sorry - in reply to Karlos.
That is why I chose comprehensive for my DCs ThesecretoftheNile.

@Karlos yes we can make a pretty good guess. It was a best seller and it was nominated for a prestigious award. So it's probably quite good. :)

My central contention about John O'Farrell is that he is a smug, irritating twat whose arguments are of little relevance to a parent in my position. given that is a largely subjective point I don't see how I can be wrong, frankly.
There are plenty of independent schools which can make provision for children with SN, exoticfruits. We ended up choosing the first one we saw for ds, but there were other options. Granted, your London academic hothouses might not have wanted him, but I didn;t wnat them, and wouldnl;t even if he hadn;t had ASD. Awful places.

I'm sorry you've had to fight so hard for what is right for your child, Karlos, and glad that you've found something that seems to be working OK.

So because books sell well and are nominated for awards that means we should assume they're good, does it?
There's that naivety coming out again. When you get to my age you will hopefully have realised that our culture generally rewards mediocrity.Given the quality of Mr o'Farrell's writing generally, I'm content to assume that rule applies here.

Does our culture generally award mediocrity? I think that's a bit of a sweeping statement.

Possibly it is, but the stupidity of the contention that because something has sold a lot of copies and been nominated for some award its quality can be assumed startled me into over-statement.

@Karlos you are a magnificent example of a private school parent.

I think John O'Farrell writes rather well, myself! And it does seem a little strong toCall him a smug irritating twat because he doesn't specially mention circumstances specifically like yours when he is writing an genrql article on state education.

Could you give annex ample of him being a smug irritating twat?

I cant believe this "discussion" is still going on and the hostility shown is really rather sad. Ultimately does it really matter what we as individual parents chose as long as we are happy with our choice. Those who send their DCs to good state schools seem pretty convinced that they would not get anything better in the independent sector. Those of us who pay feel that what we get is better for a whole raft of reasons. But seeker TOSN et al and let's not forget John OFarrell as you and he clearly believe it's no better and as you're being asked to pay for it what does it really matter to you what other people believe and how they chose to educate their children?

Sorry should have read .not being asked to pay for it!!

You surely just find the education that best fits your DC?

I expect that Karlos would have used state education had there been an excellent school locally and I expect John O'Farrell would have paid if he had been utterly disgusted with his local choice.
There are of course those who just think 'independent =good' and you can give them all sorts of evidence that it isn't always true and they won't believe it.
The vast majority of people can't afford the independent choice, even if they would love to take it. There are lots of people who were privately educated themselves who can't do it for their own DCs.
I never know who it gets so polarised when lots of people use both- I know that I am not the only person who would have been quite happy to have one DC at a state school and one at a private and I know many more who have used a state primary school and private secondary or vice versa.

On a personal level, in day to day life, of course it makes no difference to me if someone down the road sends his or her child to private school.

However I don't ever think that the 'as long as we as individuals are happy, whats the problem?' is a satisfactory answer to this or any issue. Then again that is a political viewpoint which obviously not everyone shares.

What does make a difference to me on a personal day to day level is people like Jabed making stupid, offensive, ill informed statements about state schools.

And although on a day to day level it also doesn't matter to me if someone drives a range rover Evoque, or feeds their child nothing but McDonald's, or has a golly wog in the window that I can't see, or kicks kittens, or whatever, I still have an opinions about that which I will give, and I still think that every single one of those things actually matters, whether or not I can see them or they hurt me.

TOSN of course you are entitled to have a view as am I but it appears few things on MN create so many irrate postings and such strong emotions when ultimately most who are against independent ed don't think it's better anyway so why get so worked up? If you genuinely hold this view surely it's like getting yourself worked up that your neighbour drives a Ford and you drive a Vauxhall.

And I meant to add that I completely understand your irritation about stupid offensive remarks about state schools because I feel the same about people who make gross generalisations or stupid and offensive remarks about independent schools the children who attend them and their parents.

If you look, I'm not worked up. I find some of the things on here irritating, but I'm not. 'getting myself worked up', so it is all good!

(and it's more like if my neighbour drove a ford but spent all his time saying vauxhalls were rubbish and basically the same as trabants, and only fords are good, and taking polls of all my other neighbours about why they also thought that fords were best ).

morethanpotatoprints:
You have no idea what it is like to be traumatised throughout your entire education. To dread going to school because you know the teachers will smack you, humiliate you in front of the class, to be called thick, stupid, dmb, mron, imil. For the kids to laugh, some to help and sympathise and then get in trouble themselves
To have hard wooden board rubbers thrown at you and to know that the next day it will all start again

reflecting on my own education made me break down in the middle of a lecture during my PGCE, where I finally composed myself and told my peers of my traumatised childhood. I then sought counselling.

Don't you dare moan about your education

But I do know what you went through. I am sorry. I don?t think your experience was that uncommon either unfortunately? I know lots of kids in my old school got treated like that too.

Whilst there may have been good SM, and whilst there may be some good comprehensives - and whilst state schools may be OK in some places for some posters and for folk like O'Farrel (and I wonder what his DC think or might think in due course? Will they share his view?), I think for many more they are not in my experience and that is my opinion.

Is it by Jove? Well you know what they say about opinions....